Waah! Life Ho Toh Aisi – All Hell Broke Loose (Completed)

pdate-1(The Return)​

Remember this: Legends never make a comeback. They wait for that perfect moment to take the spotlight from overdone, lame and idiot peoples....

"There's nothing half so pleasant as coming home again"
They Say all roads From hell takes you to home...

Start mein Maine socha tha ye kissi jhant aadmi k dwaara banaai gayi ek chutiya quote hai , lekin filhaal mereko ye theek lag rahi thi because We are back bitches...after over 550 days(18 months)we are finally coming back home.... BC bahot yaad aai ghar ki lekin jaana bhi jaruri tha warna abtak mera dimag kaam karna bandh karchuka hota or main marr chuka hota yaa fir kissi paagalkhaane mein padda hota isliye jaana padda and now I am perfectly fine ..And we both are back...

Or jab humdono gayab they toh kya kya hua woh batadun Aapko thoda Mota-2...

Elections.....

In 550 din yaani 1.5 saal mein kaafi kuch hua jinmein sabse main they elections India ki kuch states mein legislative Assembly k elections hue Jinmein Main States they ,Haryana ,UP,Punjab,Delhi,Rajasthan,Gujarat ,Himachal Pradesh and Uttarakhand ...yaani mostly North Indian states mein....So Hua ye ki Haryana ,Punjab ,Delhi ,Rajasthan or Gujarat mein humaari party ko ektarfa jeet milli approximately 75% MLAs humaare they in states mein iske alaawa UP mein bhi humaari he sarkaar aai lekin Humein dusri party se gathbanhan(alliance) karna padda ...Himachal Pradesh or Uttarakhand mein humein haar kaa saamna karna padda lekin un states se koi farak nahi padta tha waise bhi humaari Party wahaan kaafi kamjorr thi lekin Jo humein caahiye tha woh millgaya tha north India par kabja North India ki political superpower ban chuke they Deva bhai or Humaari party Bhartiya Lok dal (BLD)... Deva bhai ne khud cabinet ministers kaa selection kiya Harr states k cm,home minister etc unhone personally select kiye khud unhone ek bhi post nahi li jaisa unhone Babhi ko promise kiya tha woh keval party k Leader Or mentor Banne rahe...North India humaara tha or ab bus isse sudhaarna tha Jo kaam Deva bhai suru kar chuke they already...

Ek or Jo sabse main Cheej thi woh thi Deva bhai ki shaadi ji haan Deva bhai ne Deepika babhi se shaadi karli thi humaare bina he kyunki Maine he jaatey hue ek letter chhoda tha jaisa aapko pata hai usme kaafi kaam ki cheejain thi unmein se ek thi dono ki shaadi hojaae jaldi se Jo hochuki thi...

Uske alaawa Sab cheejain main ahista ahista aap sabko bataata rahunga kya hua kya nahi filhaal time tha ek behtreen returning Entry kaa you know there is nothing in this world like a returning entrance... iske liye maine behtreen din select kiya tha ...Aaj mera birthday hai or Abhi shyaam ko haweli par Deva bhai ne ek bahot badi party rakhi thi jisme kaafi saare leaders ,businessman, politiciana etc mojudd they uske alaawa meri team(Anjali ,Rajat ,Jiya, Pooja,Deepak or Ajay)+ mere bhai meri jaan Sam Mangal Rishi or Ravi toh fir they he.....raat k 8 baj chuke they or main Or Abeer abhi abhi airport se taxi mein aae they or filhaal haweli k bahaar khaddey they ek kone mein....or ji haan Andar kissi ko nahi pata tha ki hum aane waale hain..

Main-Finalyyyyyyy I am back bhenchodddddddd...

Abeer-me too...

Main-oh god it feels Fabulous to be back ...ye hawa ye atmosphere ye haweli ye log ohh! I love it I fucking love it...

Abeer-andar chal be bukh lagi hai ...

Main-bukha he Marta rahiyo gand marre BC entrance kaa kuch nahi entry aisi honi caahiye ki aankhein bahaar aajaein loggon ki..

Hum 10mins orr ruke bahaar cigarette fukki tabtak saare guests almost aachukey they haweli puri tarah sajaai gayi thi Lawn mein party thi..humlog ne apne bags uthaae Jo bhenchod bahot bhaari they..Humlog gate par aae or jaise he guards ne humein dekha unki aankhein bahaar aane ko hogayi...

Main-wassup shyam kaka...

Shyam-B.b.beta...

Main-yo chownk gaye naa...

Shyam kaka humse Galle mille..

Main-bus ab bahaar he rakhoge yaa Andar bhi jaan doge...

Kaka-kahaan they beta itane time kya kiya..?

Main-mast muthiyaan pelli ....:laughing:

Ye sun sablog hansdiye...

Gate khulla humlog Andar aae lawn mein Sab ek jagah ikatha hue they Deva bhai stage par kuch bol rahe they unke sath babhi Sam Mangal Ravi Rishi or Team khaddi thi...

Main-Anjali toh or bhi maal hogayi re 1.5 saal mein....

Abeer -agreed...

Main-maine purpose maardena hai...

Abeer-usne reject kardena hai...

Sabka dhyaan bhai par tha isliye humlog piche chup chaap khaddey hogaye...

Abeer-ab kyun rukk gaya be ...

Main-bitch wait for the exact dialogue fir entry maarenge...

Abeer-bhosdk Tere dialogues k chakkar mein bukha he marr jaaunga main...

Deva-He is Great oopps Sorry he is AP the great ...Genius absolute Genius...Uska dimag normal se kai gunna jyaada tejj chalta hai ...He did things no one can do ..He pulled things no one can pull off.. He proved it many times why he is AP the great ..He can't be defeated usse haraaya nahi jaa shakta kyunki woh sachaai k liye ladta hai ..Sabko pata hai kaise usne north India ko bachaaya wahi ek main reason tha hum North India mein elections jeetey ...And now I am sure he will be back Soon Woh uss Vertigo ko haraadega I am sure you know why because uske sath hai Abeer Singh ...My two of the most dangerous weapons ...Woh dono millke world war 3 suru kar shaktey hain :D ...or jabtak Abeer AP k sath hai AP humessa jeetega because Abeer uske sath hai..You know AP hates his birthday Parties I don't know why lekin usko passand nahi khudki Birthday Parties lekin aaj agar woh yahaan hota toh he would have loved this party...

Ye sunke hum dono aage badhe...

Main-Nope I still hates my birthday parties but I love it that you guyss came here for me....

Ye bolke Main Bheed ko cheerta hua Aage aaya Abeer mere sath-2..

loggon k munh khulle k khulle rehgaye they thodi si awaaj bhi nahi nikal rahi thi Deva bhai or baaki toh almost shock mein they unke cehre par bahot jyaada khussi or surprised emotions they , main stage par aaya ...woh log abhi bhi ghurre jaarahe they jiske 2 reason they 1)1.5 saal baad main waapis aaya tha main I mean AP bhosdko... 2).meri physique jiska jikar main karna bhulgaya toh in 1.5 saalon mein mere pass karne ko kuch nahi tha toh Main train hogaya meri body BC gand faad hogayi meri personality aisi hogayi ki BC gand fatt jaae saamne waale ki matlab jyaada jaanwar type nahi but behtreen body hogayi Jo mere sareer par suit karti hai...jaruri nahi hai jaanwaron ki tarah body banaao ...

Main-Aise kya dekh rahe ho original hun...So guyss I am b....

Main itana he bola tha ki Mangal ne bhayaanak punch mere pait mein diya ...

Main-ohh!shit...

Punch lagtey he main niche girra Or Sam or Ravi ne udhar se Abeer ko ek ek punch diya...woh bhi ghutano par aagaya ...1.5 saal ka frustration ab nikalne waala tha...

Abeer-meri galti nahi hai be ye jaan bujh kar legaya mereko...

Ye suntey he Mangal ne ek laat di Abeer ko...

Or Ravi or Sam mere saamne aagaye...Log bhi shocked they ki ye Kaisa pyaar hai bhenchod ...

Main-are Ravi Sam mere bhai meri ja....

Aage kuch bolta usase pehle ek or laat meri chest par lagi...

Main-ohh !dude this shit is so fucked up...Time out time out...Bhai help...

Deva-sorry Suna nahi maine...

Main-Anjali tum log toh police ho help please...

Anjali-Sorry I am off duty ...

Main-dafukkk...Babhi Aap toh bachaao...

Babhi-1 mere naam kaa bhi maaro...

Main-shitttt....

Unhone mereko ek laat or di or fir jab main niche girr gaya toh uthaake Galle se lagaaliya Hum 5on ek sath Galle lage ...That's what we call brother hood...

Ravi-bc we missed you so much...

Main-we also missed u guys BC...ye kya jhant jaise kapde pehne hain lodu tune durr hatt pencho aukaat he naa hai Teri merese Galle millne ki..

Ravi-or maar khaaega lawde...

Main-joking re gandmarre lekin lag tu jhant jaisa he raha hai..no doubt about that...

Continued...

"You’re fighting a war That I’ve already won."

Update-3 (Feeling Awesome With Mangal ,Deva ,Abeer and 36 others)

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Anjali-Abeer Tere sath he rehta tha rehab mein...

Abeer-nahi allowed nahi tha sath rehna start k 5-6 months kyunki iski situation critical thi toh sath mein allowed nahi tha toh mujhe daily 1.5 hour isase Milne ki permission thi woh bhi iski cell k mirror gate k dusri taraf se lekin fir 2-3 months rehab mein iske sath he raha main then fir bahaar aaye 1 saal tab toh fir ek he ghar mein rehtey they bus ye daily training k liye waapis rehab centre jaata tha ....

Mangal-matlab kull milaake iski bahot buri haalat thi...

Abeer-puch matt be start mein 3-4 months jab main millne jaata toh aadhi baar toh mujhe he nahi pehchanta tha aise he khoon se latpath padda rehta tha ye .. as nose or munh se continuously khoon behta tha iske...

Mangal-ooohhh!

Main-abe khaana khaatey time toh matt yaad dilwaa bhai...

Babhi-Seriously Mangal ...Ab koi iss topic par baat nahi karega...

Mangal-Sorry Bhabhi...

Uske baad unhone merese or kai saare qsns kiye jinke jawaab mere pass taiyaar they wahaan k baare mein thoda saa bataaya kaafi kuch chupaayaa kyunki Sab kuch bataane laayak nahi hota....Humlog subah k 2 baje takk mere baare mein he baat kartey rahe literally kissi ko nind nahi aai kyunki unki curiosity itani thi mere baare mein jaanane ki ...wohlog suntey rahe main kuch sach kuch juth bataata gaya or at last jab sabne ek ek qsn puch liya tha tab unhone mujhe chhoda Anjali and team Haweli par he sogaye they as subah honeko thi...

Main apne room mein aaya Jo meenu ne abhi clean karwaaya tha BC iss room ko dekhne ko aankhein tadap gayi thi wahi bed wai bathroom Sab ka Sab wahi main nahaaya Kapde change kiye or fir bed par gir padda or literally 1minute k Andar mereko nind aagayi gajab ki nind aai Jo subah 10 baje jaake khulli....

Main-are bhenchod kya nind aai hai...phakk BC...

Main fresh hua or fir kal raat waali ghatnaon ko sochne laga BC ek sapna saa lag raha tha woh lekin ek ajeeb se khussi mere mann mein chaai thi ki main waapis aagaya tha...

Main niche aaya toh wahaan Sam Ravi Mangal or babhi kuch baatein kar rahe they hall mein bhai abhi abhi apne room se bahaar aae they shayad kahin jaa rahe they woh....

Main-Supp...

Babhi-uthgaya mera betu....

Main-yo....

Mangal-USa waale bhaisahaab aagaye hain...

Main-tera munh fod dena hai Maine ....

Meenu-coffee ...

Main-naah....

Bhai-acha hua tu uthgaya mujhe laga tha bina mille nikalna padega ...

Main-koi kaam tha kya...

Bhai-haan aa baith... Abeer ....

Abeer-ji bhai...

Bhai-tu bhi aaja...

Hum Sab waapis baithgaye ...

Bhai-tumlog ko nahi maalum hoga lekin humlog chunaav .....

Main-i know everything bhai yahaan aane se pehle puri research ki hai...

Bhai-everything?..

Main-suno..1.5 saal mein North India ki 8 states mein assembly elections hue sabse pehle hue Haryana ,Gujarat , Rajasthan and Uttarakhand mein ...Haryana mein 90 mein se 70 seats humaari party ne jeeti or Sarkaar banaai...Gujarat mein total 182 mein se 130 seats humaari hui humne wahaan bhi Sarkaar banai...Rajasthan ki total 200 seats mein se 120 humaari hui humne wahaan bhi Sarkaar banaai .....Uttarakhand mein humein 70 mein se 20 seats he milli so humein haar kaa saamna karna padda Jo koi baddi baat nahi hai...in elections k 6 months baad Uttar Pradesh, and Delhi mein Assembly k elections hue UP ki total 403 mein se humein milli 180 seats Jo sarkar banaane k liye kaafi nahi thi isliye humne wahaan ki ek or party se samjhotta kiya or usko apne sath joddliya jinko milli thi 80 seats toh humaari total hogayi 260 seats toh wahaan bhi apni he Sarkaar banni...Delhi ki 70 seats mein se 55 humaari hui so Delhi bhi humaari hui...

and abhi 1 months pehle Himachal Pradesh or Punjab mein bhi elections hue Punjab mein humein 117 mein se 77 seats milli as a result yahaan bhi humne Sarkaar banaai Himachal Pradesh mein humein 68 mein se keval 22 seats he milli so yahaan humein haar kaa saamna karna padda...Frankly speaking humne pure north India ko Aajaadi dilwaadi hai or aaplog unhe sudhaarne mein lage ho Jo bahot achi baat hai...

Ye Sab sunke sabne mere munh ki taraf dekha ...

Main-come on yaar coma mein nahi tha main...

Deva-gajab or tujhe pata hai ye Sab Kaise hua...

Main-ek main reason toh ye hai ki humne north India ko surendra se bachaaya jisase humaari reputation pure north India mein fail gayi no. 2 aap sabka hard work hai aapne Jo kiya hai north India k liye woh koi nahi karta log dusron se jyaada aap par vishwaash kartey hain....

Deva-or ek main reason tha tu tune Jo Jo kiya tha naa yahaan jaane se pehle logg Tere debt mein hain abtak humaare kissi bhi neta se kahin jyaada fan following thi Teri uss time loggon ko mere alaawa ek cehra or millgaya tha trust karne ko tune unke liye kya kya saha ye vertigo and all loggon ko Sab pata hai isliye unki sympathy Tere sath thi...

Main-thanks men...lekin ek minute meri fan following thi ka kya Matlab hai ab nahi hai kya...

Deepika-u know AP loggon kaa ek asool hota hai caahe kissi ne unke liye kuch bhi kiya ho woh usse jabtak yaad rakhtey hain jabtak woh aage bhi unke liye woh karta rahe jaise ki ab tum gayab they toh log bhullne lage they tumhe...

Main-Not a big problem yaad dilwaane mein konsa jyaada time lagta hai...Aakhirkar yun he AP na kehtey log mereko....

Deepika- ye baat ...baitho Sab naastha karlo...

Hum Sab naastha karne lage...

Main-a Mangal woh meri 12th ki mark sheet kaa jugaad karwaaiyo...

Deva-mark sheet konsi....?

Main-are 12th ki mark sheet....

Deva-exam kab diya tu 12th k..?

Main-apun ko Jarurat thodi hai exams dene ki waise bhi main aaram se clear kar leta...ab mast Sam or Ravi waale college mein admsn lunga...

Deva- ab bich mein kaise admission lega tu woh bhi bina 12th clear kiye...?

Main-Kamaal kartey ho bhai Ab toh humlog college ko he ek saal piche karne ki position mein hain or aap Admission k liye rotey ho...

Deva-are media Waale nahi maanenge ...Misuse of power bolenge...

Main-woh unki problem hai men why would I care...

Deva-issi matter kaa bawaal banaadenge woh...

Main-wahi Toh kaam hai unka ....

Deva-tu 12th doobara karle....

Ye sun main bhayaanak chownka ...

Main-Say what...?

Deva-12th doobara karle...

Main-woh sun liya tha Maine ye mera shocking expression tha wait a minute ...12 doobara karle what the fuckkkk bol kya rele ho bhai aaj subah subah Thodi leli thi kya...

Deva-are aise he toh chalta hai humessa...

Main-main 21 saal kaa ladka 12th doobara karun woh bhi uss tuche se school mein jabki ye log college mein hain ...What the fuck mujhse toh imagine bhi nahi horaha ye Sab..

Deva-abe puri baat toh sun....aise kaise Mark Sheet banjaaegi bhai...

Main-woh aaplog socho

Babhi-chup hojaao dono...

Main-j baat babhi samjhaao toh sahi kya pagalon jaisi baatein kar rele hain bhai...

Babhi-i said dono chup...Suno Haryana Board mein Ye rule hai ki agar koi Student paper dene centre aane mein unable hai fir woh caahe bimar ho accident hogaya ho jail Mein ho yaa or koi problem ho toh board usse option deta hai ki board kaa ek worker uss bandey k ghar ,hospital yaa jail mein jaaega or uski nigrani mein woh student exam dega ...

Main-thats why I lobe you so much babhi....

Update-4(Intros Over Story Started)

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Main-ab Mangal tujhe ye karna hai ki Haryana board kaa koi khass banda dhund jisse tu ache se jaanta ho or uski ek fake trip plan kar USA ki jiss time exams they or meri marksheet banwaadey waise bhi koi dekhega nahi itana deep lekin fir bhi kami kyun chhodani ....

Mangal-ok hojaaega....

Babhi-or waise bhi isme koi buri baat nahi hai sidhi si baat hai AP aaram se clear karleta 12Th bina padhe bhi or already uske 1.5 saal kharaab hogaye study k or agar ab ek saal or 12th mein waste karwaaenge toh fir future mein problems hongi...

Main-exactly ..Babhi you are so smart...

Babhi-maska matt laga agar college mein admission lega toh meri shartein maanani padengi warna bahot bura hoga...

Main-aapki sabhi shartein manjoor hain...

Babhi-1st - 3 months hain second Semester k exams ko toh tujhe woh toh clear karne he hain sath mein jitane subject ho shake first sem k bhi clear karne hain ...kyunki tujhe kuch bhi nahi pata first semester mein kya kya hua tha toh better hoga study suru karde...

Main-Study ..ummmmm! Hojaaega thoda time lagega routine banaane ko lekin banaalunga main ...

Babhi-2nd -regularly college jaana hai no bunk and all padh likh le ye Tere bhaiya ki tarah tujhe politics mein nahi jaana hai...

Main-ohh! Come on babhi I hate politics...

Deva-aji haan hum toh yahaan paagal baithey hain..

Main-politics sucks ...

Deepika-Yep...

Main-Aap kahin jaane waale they...?

Deva-haan bus Breakfast k baad nikal lunga...

Main-Thoda postpone nahi ho shakta ..?

Deva-ho shakta hai kyun nahi Ho shakta ...Guptaji Meeting jarra reschedule karwaado Dopehar baad....

Guptaji-ji sir...

Deva-Bol AP kya hua...

Main-team ko aane do...

Deva-ok...

Thodi derr baad Anjali And baaki team bhi wahaan aagaye wohlog ghar gaye they kapde wapde change karke aagaye...

Jiya-OMG babhi k hath kaa naasta I love it ...

Babhi-aao baitho Sab jaldi jaldi...

Main-baadmein woh Sab....

Jiya-thoda saa bhi nahi kya...?

Main-baadmein aaram se karlena yaar ...

Anjali- OK ab bataao AP kyun bulaaya itti jaldi abhi Tere pass se he toh gaye they...

Main-aao baitho...

Babhi-Seriously AP kal tumlog waapis aae or itani jaldi firse lag jaaoge ...waise bhi yelog thode din or sambhall shaktey haryana ko Tere bina..

Main-i know babhi but fir bhi making sure what I miss and what is coming...

Babhi-just whatever Andar jaake baat karo idhar mereko ye Sab nahi caahiye...

Main-ok OK..

Hum sablog Living Room mein aaye or baithgaye...

Wahaan Main ,Abeer ,Mangal,Bhai,Rishi ,Sam ,Ravi ,Anjali,Rajat ,Jiya ,Pooja ,Deepak or Ajay Mojuud they yaani humaari puri unit...

Main-So hello team I am back ...

Abeer-haan be woh Sab hogaya muddey par aa jaldi...

Main-so the thing is main or Abeer abhi nahi aane waale they because thoda treatment baaki tha or uske baad thoda mind rest like 6-7 months or gayab rehna tha but aana padda you know 2 reasons hain humaari waapsi k No.1 Is Red John ....

Ye naam sunke wahaan mojuud sablog ko ek dhakka laga jo ki lagna he tha or jabtak woh uss dhakke se ubhartey hain main Aapko bataata hun kon hai ye bhen kaa bhai.....

Red John Is basically a serial killer the Legendary serial killer best in business ..Usne naa keval India ko balki pure Asia Ko pichle 18 saal se hilaake rakha tha India ,Pakistan ,China,Bangladesh ,Nepal ,Japan ,Vietnam he was everywhere... woh shifts mein kaam karta tha woh ek City choose karta wahaan kaafi time rehta or wahaan saikdon loggon ko mout ki nind sulaake fir kuch time k liye gayab ho jaata Woh Pakistan mein lagaatar 3saal takk tha from 2001-2003 takk usne 3 saal mein 102 loggon ko maara tha aise he China mein ,Nepal , Srilanka ,etcetera he was a killing machine people used to call him The Plague of Modern era Usne approx 400-450 approx loggon ko mout ki nind sulaaya tha jisme budhe ,jawaan ,Auratein shaamil thi uska khouf itana tha ki Log Cancer se jyaada usase darrtey they pakada jaana toh durr kissi ko ye bhi nahi pata tha ki woh dikhta Kaisa hai not a single fucking hint ...Ekmaatar theory uske baare mein Jo Theek thi woh thi ki woh ek Indian Tha yaa Pakistani ....Uska baap Indian tha or Shayad Partition k baad uski family Pakistan chali gayi lekin woh waapis India aaya kaafi saal baad.. ye ek theory thi Jo kuch kuch theek kahi jaa shakti thi....

Woh India mein pehle bhi aa chuka hai:2000-2001 mein woh Mumbai mein tha uss time usne 41 loggon ko maara ....fir 2003-2004 Karnataka mein tha woh wahaan 32 loggon ko maara uske baad 2006-2007 Chennai wahaan usne 37 loggon ko maara ...

Serial killer World history mein bahot hue lekin isase dangerous koi nahi hua or almost Sab pakadey bhi gaye but ye nahi jiska ek main reason tha ye akela kaam nahi karta tha iske sath iske alaawa at least 6 se 12+ loggon k hone k guesses hain ..

Fir 2010 mein woh pakada gaya I mean pakada jaane k kaafi kareeb tha Karachi ki ek building mein woh Trapped tha uske he ek sathi ne thodi si tip dedi Karachi police ko Usne exactly itana kahaa tha "Red John Caahiye to Iss jagah aajao uske sath sath uske sathi bhi milljaenge " jahaan se ye theory bhi confirm hogayi thi ki woh akela nahi tha Karachi police ne uss building ko 4on or se gherr liya tha naa koi Andar se bahaar or naa he koi bahaar se Andar jaa shakta tha even Building se nikalne waale Sewers takk ko cover karliya tha unhone ...Fir Unhone John ko surrender karne kaa moka diya lekin aage Jo hua woh unexpected tha Wahaan mojuud log bataatey hain ki uss building mein ek k baad ek 6 bombs blast hue jisme woh puri building or usme mojuud 16 families k 58 members or sath sath john or uski team bhi Mout ki nind sogaye Ye confirm hogaya tha ki john bhi iske Andar maara gaya or uske sathi bhi as Uske baad kuch bhi nahi hua killings ek dum rukk gayi toh loggon ne maan liya ki john is dead lekin aisa nahi tha 2017 mein yaani pichle saal ekdum se Delhi mein waisi he haalat mein dead bodies millne lagi jaisi John K victims ki hoti thi start mein Bhai and government ne loggon mein darr naa faile isliye isse keval ek Behrupiya bataaya or kahaa ki asli red john marr chuka hai lekin jab body count badhne laga or experts ki salaah li gayi toh ye confirm hoagaya ki ye Red John he hai or woh abki baar bhi akela nahi hai ..Uske baad 2018 mein woh Haryana mein aagaya and again police yaa cbi kissi ko bhi koi jaankaari nahi thi ki woh kon hai kahaan hai... Lekin abki baar usne bahot kam loggon ko apna victim banaaya jo ek khatarnaak baat thi kyun woh aage bataaunga red john ki kya kya Styles hain woh aage bataaunga...

Main-Sorry for the pause main readers k sath busy hogaya tha...

Deva-Say what...?

Main-nothing so basically aap sabko maalum hai ki john and team ab haryana mein hai or wohlog bahot soch samjh k kadam uthaa rahe hain As u all know red john ki 3 khasiyat hain No.1 woh keval unhi loggon ko chuntta hai jinke Marne se uss city ,State yaa country ko nukshaan ho Like Scientists, Doctors ,Politicians ,Charity Group k CEO's Wagairaah wagairaah no.2 Woh humessa apne Victim kaa Left hand kaa thumb apne sath le jaata hai no.3 woh victim k blood Se Body par Chaaku se ek banaavat mein Red Likhta hai Jo banaapaana bahot he mushqill hai ...

DEva-AP look this is a serious thing Red John is the biggest threat right now CBI uspar koi jaankaari haashil nahi kar paai hai or harr ek din Woh yahaan khulla ghumta hai it means ki woh kuch bada plan kar raha hai ...

Main-exactly warna woh yun itane kam bandon ko nahi maarta .....iska ek he reason hai ki uske mind mein kuch bada chal raha hai...Woh kuch naa kuch karega Woh serial Killer k sath sath ek organized gang kaa boss bhi hai jisme keval uske trusted bandey hain ...humein usse dhundana hai isase pehle ki woh apne plan mein kaamyaab ho...

deepak-Ye case toh CBI k pass haina ..?

Main-bhai Ye case transfer karwaao toh Apni Unit k pass .....

Deva-hojaaega not a big deal CBI waise bhi kuch dhund nahi paai hai...

Main-So kalse humlog ye case dekhenge And guyss beshak red John or uske Sathi kitane he tejj hon but they are not faster then us ...

DEVA-OK ye toh hua First reason No.2 kya hai aane kaa...

Main-No.2 hai Sanjay Das .....

Unlog ko jitana shock John kaa naam sunke laga tha unse kahin guna jyaada Sanjay Das k naam se laga ...I mean literally woh log space mein chale Gaye they ...

Ji haan Sanjay Das Yaani SD jiss naam kaa hint Surendra ne diya tha Wahi SD.....

Update-5(SD )

​
Sanjay Das India Ka sabse bada underworld Don hai the biggest baddest and most powerful Don in entire india Right now Woh Mumbai se operate karta tha lekin ab pichle kuch time se woh Delhi haryana mein shift horaha hai apne pair yahaan jama raha hai uske naam par kaafi charcha hogi lekin abhi nahi baadmein...jab time or mouka sahi hoga...

Deva-AP look Red John takk theek lekin SD ko humlog Chhod detey hain woh hum CBI,IB +Raw par chhod detey hain woh koi majaak nahi hai AP he is a fucking Beast 65%india uske ishaaron par chalta hai He is something else Surendra bhi uske niche kaam karta tha surendra jaise najaane kitane Uske liye kaam kartey hain ...

Anjali-I agree hum usse nahi harra shaktey uski gang uski power uski pohanch uska khouff humaari soch se bhi jyaada hai Humne beshak surendra ko haraadiya ho lekin SD not even a chance ...

Sab-Yes...

Mangal-bhai SD se humlog jitana durr rahein utana achha hai...

Main-no no no let me make one thing perfectly clear Woh North India mein Gilli Danda khelne nahi aaya hai woh humaare liye he aaya hai...

Sab-what..?

Main-ji haan Mumbai ko chhodke Yahaan Delhi mein woh bhalla kyun aaega chutiya nahi hai woh... uske reason hum he hain No doubt woh 65% India mein failla hai lekin usko 100% caahiye or baaki kaa 35% yaani north india humlog chalaatey hain next usse ye bhi pata hai ki Pure India mein usse keval hum he takkar de shaktey hain isliye woh humein khatam karne aaya hai sathmeim humne uske sabse khass bandey Surendra ko maardiya toh uska badla bhi Lena hai usse isliye ye loud and clear boldun woh humaare liye aaya hai or agar humne kuch nahi kiya toh woh humein maarega nahi balki tadpaaega or tabtak tadpaaega jabtak hum khud apni mout ki bheek nahi maange ....

Ye sun sabko thoda jhatka sa laga...

Abeer-yes it is what it is yaa hum usko khatam karein yaa woh humein ek cheej honi he hai AP or mera already ispe bahot Lamba chauda discussion ho chuka hai Jo isne kahaa Woh Sab sahi hai woh north India mein aaya hai taaki humein haraake khud 100% India mein aajae he knows ki keval hum he hain Jo usse roukk shaktey hain isliye woh yahaan aaya...lekin filhaal Woh problem nahi hai as woh abhi north India mein apna sabkuch settle kar raha hai apna pair yahaan jama raha hai so Woh underground he hoga we can't do anything about that... toh humaari main priority red john ko pakadna hai...

Main-yep baat rahi SD ki Toh fuck it we'll defeat him we will kill him I don't know how I don't know when but I can promise you this agar tumlog mere sath rahe toh i will kill him...

Sab-always with you...

Mangal -Marrenge jeeyenge sath-2 ....Lekin SD k pass toh bhai Unka support bhi hai....

Jiya-kiska...?

Deva-wahi jinka naam nahi letey..

Main-ssshhhhh! Readers ko ek sath saari info nahi deni hai men...

Deva-matlab...

Main-kuch nahi ...SD par Lamba chodda discussion hoga lekin abhi nahi ...Abhi k liye red john Par focus karo bhai aap CBI waalon se baat karlo ...

Deva-hojaaega...

Main-we can't let him kill innocent peoples we have to stop him ....He maybe fast but not faster then us...

Sab-hell yeah let's do this..

Uske baad bhai apni meeting k liye nikal gaye or Anjali and team police station k liye Sam or Ravi college ko chale gaye ...Jaana toh mujhe bhi tha lekin as I said already entry faadu honi caahiye...isliye Maine college jaane kaa program thoda postponed kardiya...Mangal Party HeadOffice chala gaya ghar bache Main babhi Meenu Or Abeer ...

Babhi-AP waise mujhe kuch ajeeb lagraha ...

Main-matlab ....

Babhi-tune Sab Sach bataaya haina kya kya hua...

Main-oh come on babhi ...

Babhi-i know ki tu mujhse kuch nahi chupaata lekin fir bhi mujhe lag raha koi toh baat hai Jo tu chhupaa raha hai humse...

Main-Nothing babhi all good...bus thoda disturbed hun uss sabse isliye thoda awkward lagraha hun nothing else...

Babhi-you know koi bhi problem ho tu mujhse baat kar shakta hai ...

Main-yeah yeah I know that ...

Babhi-waise you know what Nicki madam bhi Tere he college mein hain as a Lecturer....

Main-what the fuck ye kab hua...

Babhi-Nicki toh kabse try kar rahi thi Lecturer k liye school teacher k liye woh overqualified thi kuch colleges se offers bhi aae but usko north India k best college mein he padhaana tha so interviews wagairaah diye they usne 2-3 baar reject hui but last year woh select hogayi ...

Main- that is so cool...

Babhi-yes it is...

Abeer-babhi ...

Babhi-Haan...

Abeer-Shaadi ki album kahaan hai..

Main-hell yeah mujhe album and CD dekhni hai...

Babhi-Meenu...

Meenu-Ji babhi...

Babhi-laa k de Toh...

Meenu-ji babhi...

Uske baad humlog shaadi ki CD dekhne mein busy hogaye or dopehar 2 baje Babhi k pass bhai kaa call aaya...As mere pass mobile nahi tha naa he Abeer k pass humlog bukhe nange log they...jinke pass jhant baraabar kuch nahi tha...

Lawde aisa naa bol meri net worth maalum haina kitani hai bhosdk tujh jaise 10000000 ko khreed lun main...

Ohh!toh actually tu khudko he khareed lega ...Vertigo thoda bahot bacha hua hai lagta hai...

Babhi-(chilaake) AP.....

Main-sorry kya hua...

Babhi-le bhaiya hain Tere...

Main-ji Bhai...

Deva-meri CBI chief Anjana Singh se baat hogayi hai thodi power use karni paddi but woh maan gayi case ACU (Anti Crime unit) (yaani humlog , humaari team ko ek special naam diya gaya hai ) Ko dene k liye but woh caahti hai ki case ki files tum khud personally jaake collect karo Delhi se...

Main-what the fuck Delhi kon jaae ab...

Deva-tu chala jaa Abeer ko lejaa sath mein jaana or aana he hai easy work case milljaega...

Main-ok jaake aatey humlog...

Deva-ok...

Call disconnected...

Abeer-kya hua...

Main-delhi jaana hai...

Babhi-kyun..?

Maine unko bataaya reason ....

Babhi-konsa case hai ...

Main-woh...

Babi-nevermind mujhe nahi sunana jarur koi kharaab saa hoga...

Main-yep..Jaanwar tu ready hojaa...Babhi Rishi car laaya kya koi new...

Babhi-ohh!come on tu jaanta hai usse 1.5 saal gayab they tumlog 1.5 saal mein woh at least 25-30 cars laaya hoga Kuch din pehle bataa raha tha tune Jo Surendra ki property kaa usko CEO banaaya hai uske profit mein se approx 38-39 crore ki cars leke aaya Woh.....Garrage mein check karle...

Main-puchleta usase koi kadak hai kya...

Babhi-jaldi jaao jaldi aao raat ko late matt karna...

Main-ok..

Ye bolke main room mein aagaya Nahaaya kapde change kiye mujhe pata chala ki mere pass kapdey bhi jyaada nahi bache hain puraane waale kuch Sam or Ravi uthaalegaye waise bhi ab mujhe fit naaa aatey Woh kapdey....Jo milla woh pehna or Rishi ko call kiya...

Main-kahaan hai darling...

Rishi-office mein bhai...

Main-sun main Delhi jaaraha CBI headquarters woh Red john k files lene ...

Rishi-millgaya case...gajab...

Main-haan toh koi tadakti fadakti item bata...

Rishi- Koi bhi lejaa men kya dikkat hai...

Main-not my style be tu suggest kar Teri passand mujhe passand aati...

Rishi- Maserati Gran Turismo...

Main-holy shit...

Rishi-Black colour four seater 2.25 Crore price 4698 cc kaa engine + 4.7-litre 460bhp 32V V-Type Petrol Engine Max power 460 bhp at 7000 rpm....

Main-fuckkkk ...

Rishi-top speed 285 KMph ...0-100 Kmph in just 4.2 seconds ....

Main-Shitt this is a fucking beast bro...

Rishi-parking censors +fully secured...Anti lock breaking system...fully airbag efficient...

Main-bus kar pagle rulaaega kya...

Rishi-lele lele tera welcome back gift no.1 ...

Main-no.2 kya hai...

Rishi- Car he hai ...Or kya hoga BC.....

Main-what the shittt...

Continued....

pdate-6(Delhi)
​
Main-dusri car ki jaankaari baadmein lunga...abhi nikalta main ...

Rishi-bye bhai...

Call cut..

Main-jaanwar ready haibe...

Abeer-lawde kaa ready jhant baraabar kapdey bachey hain bc...

Main-Same bhenchod Shopping karne jaana padega BC phone ,juttey wagairaah Sab Lena hai kuch naa bacha hai pencho...

Abeer-car...

Main-matt puch bhenchod ek yahi cheej dhangki milli hai aaj...

Abeer-gajab...

Hum 2no garrage mein aae...toh wahaan cars kaa mela laga tha Guard ne Maserati ki location bataai humlog uske pass pohanchey toh aankhein bahaar aane ko hogayi...

Abeer-whatt daaa fuckkkk ....

Main-bhenchod ye toh aag laga degi bhai...

Abeer-Rishi kaa taste bhenchod daily badhta jaaraha hai...

Main-chalo safar achaa katega...

Ye bolke main driving seat par aaya car start ki BC ekdum gajab sound mein start hui car or Humlog nikal paddey 100 kms approx tha Delhi 1-1.5 ghanta lagna tha iss time traffic bhi kam he milta hai so car aag lagaati hui nikali road par or net 4 baje hum log CBI headquarters k saamne uttare....

Main-maadarjaat kya jhant baraabar building hai bhosdiwaalon ki itani badi building banaai hai but befaltu designing kuch hai he nahi...

Abeer-jhantu log ka annual budget 700 crore hai...

Main-haan bhenchod kartey kya hain itane paise kaa..

Abeer-woh kahaan millegi ab ...

Main-mujhe kya maalum bhsodk mera bhi first time he hai...

Humlog Andar enter hue Toh reception se pata chala Chief madam 4th floor par baithti hain...so chal diye lift se...

Lekin dikkat ye hui ki wahaan kuch log humein kutton k maafik ghurre jaarahe they...

Main-bhosdk ye dekh kya rahe hain...

Abeer-apne sabse Important target ko...

Main-ab woh kon hai...wait a minute kahin tu he toh nahi bhosdiwaale...

Abeer-yo...past mein inka sabse bada target main he tha bahot gand maari thi inki maine gand fatt gayi thi kai officers ki ... last mein jaake bhai jab shant hue tab sulah hogayi thi inse meri ...

Main-bhenchod jaanwar harr jagah gandugiri kari hai tune...

Humlog fourth floor par aae ...wahaan ek aunty type receptionist baithi thi...

Main-bhenchod budhau log ko receptionist banaaela hai ...

Abeer-lol...

Main-hello aunty...

Receptionist-what...

Main-ohh!sorry hello madam...

Recep-Kya hai...?

Main-Anjana Singh ji se millna hai ...

Rece-appointment hai...?

Main-hai kya be jaanwar ...

Abeer-mujhe kya maalum...

Recep-idhar time kharaab nahi karo chalo jaao...

Main-madam ji ko boliye ko AP sahaab aae hain Abeer k sath...

Recp-nikalo yahaan se bina appointment koi nahi jaata...

Main-abe jaanwar bhai ko call karbe...

Abeer-mere pass mobile nahi hai...

Main-what the shittt..Aunty ye landline chalta hai kya...

Recp-Shut upp chup chaap niklo yahaan se...Security...

Abeer-chalbe niche jaake Std se call kartey hain...

Main-ghanta bhenchod 4 floor uss jhant baraabar lift mein main nahi jaane waala...

Abeer-toh...?

Main-hit and run...

Abeer-no fucking way Abe CBI headquarters mein hain humlog ...

Main-toh kya hua darrgaya kya bhosdk...

Abeer-lawda mera...Let's do this...

Main-Madam Anjana ji waise konse room mein baithti hain...

Recep-woh saamne 403 ...lekin guards nahi jaane denge Andar...

Main- let's see....

Room at least 30-40 metre hoga or gate k just bahaar guards khaddey they +2 guards humein bahaar lejaane k liye bhi aagaye they ....

Main-1...

Abeer-2...

Main-3...let's go...

Ye boltey he Abeer ne mere ko ek punch maara pait mein jisse lagtey he main overacting kartey hue humaare pass Jo guards they unko cover karliya...or Abeer room k opposite mein bhaaga ...piche woh jhant baraabar Receptionist chilaai...

Recp-a ruko tum security...

Main-are bhosdko mujhe kya dekh rahe ho woh bhaag gaya usko pakado tumhaare baap ko ...bomb hai uske pass..

Receptionist-Security security....

Ye sun Woh 403 k bahaar Jo guards they woh bhi Abeer ko pakadne doudey...or main 403 mein sidha enter hogaya...

Main-see hit and run always works...

Lekin I guess main galat time par Andar enter hogaya ...
Kyunki Andar chair par ek 32-33 age ki hot maal Auratt baithi thi bole toh ekdum faadu milf...or woh I guess apni jacket nikaal rahi thi... Jiss wajah se uski shirt thodi fondled thi...ji haan yahi thi Anjana ji ....

Main-hi good afternoon...

Anjana-what the hell...Securi....

Lekin woh boltey boltey rukk gayi maybe pehchaan gayi thi...

Anjana-AP..??...

Main-yep yours truly....The one and only...

Or ussi time Abeer gate ko dhakka maarke bhaagta hua Andar enter hua or ekdum firse Anjana ki fatt gayi...

Abeer-w..w.what the fuck it worked...

Main-it always works...By the way Abeer meet Anajana ,Anjana meet Abeer...

Anjana-omg Abeer singh...

Abeer-hi...paani millega sans chaddey hain...

Or ussi time woh jhant baraabar guards or woh bhen ki pakodi Receptionist Andar aae...

Security-hands in the air...

Main-Nahi karunga ...

Anjana-officers leave they are with me...

Main-suna be Gareebon k Tom cruise nikal le...

Security-ok madam...

Or ye sunke woh guards nikal liye....

Anjana-aaiye have a seat ..kya lenge...

Main-coffe black...

Anjana-Supriya 3 coffee ...

Receptionist-sure mam...

Or ye bolke woh lawdi bhi nikal gayi...

Anjana-So finally we met...

Main-yo wassup...

Anjana-i am talking to Abeer...

Abeer-yo wassup...

Anjana-you know jab tum CBI k most wanted they tab main ek Senior officer thi yahaan or tumhaare case par lage Officers mein se ek main bhi thi...

Abeer-Noice...

Anjana-But tumhe pakad nahi paae humlog kabhi too bad...

Abeer-Very bad...I can't be caught....

Main-ye laundey mera dialogue maar raha ...

Anjana-true you can't be caught... On the other hand AP I have heard a lot about you the things you have done are just unimaginable even CBI kabhi surendra balram ko nahi harra paai but you did it...

Main-i ain't no CBI madam I am AP the great I can do anything...

Anjana-i know bataaya naa Maine suna hai bahot tumhaare or tumhaare dimag k baare mein...

Main-yo thanks...

Anjana-or kalse toh news mein tum dono he chaaye ho maanana padega haan vertigo ko haraake waapis aana great ...uppar se aisi entry :D..

Main-yo...3 din lagtaar entry plan kiya main baithke...

Anjana- but I don't think ki kissi bhi rehab centre mein Vertigo kaa ilaaj hai ...but tum toh ekdum theek hogaye..

Main-yo mere doctors badhiya they...and main normal patient jaisa nahi hun..

Anjana- You sure...

Main-sure hone kaa kya hai isme...

Anjana-ok cool...

Main-So boliye kaise yaad kiya humein Files toh aap kissi dusre k hath bhi bhej shakti thi...

Abeer-abe AP woh aunty coffee leke nahi aai be...

Main-shut up...comedy karta hai apne papa k saamne ....

Anjana- actually main millna caahti thi AP tumse you know red john kaa case tumhe deke ek favor kar rahi hun main tum par so I want something in return...

Main-lol favor nahi humlog isko handover karna boltey hain ....

Anjana-fir bhi main caahti toh ye case CBI k pass bhi rakh shakti thi...

Main-l+o+l deva bhai se uppar uthane ki koshish nahi karnekaaa you know you are nothing in front of him...fir bhi bolo kya help caahiye...

Anjana- I want ki tum CBI k liye kaam karo...

Main-i don't work for anyone ....

Anjana- you work for police though...

Main-nope the police works for me...

Abeer- bhisi faadu dialogue bhai...maano Liam Neeson bhaiya shakshaat aagaye hon...

Main- I know but dialogue delivery can be little bit better...

Abeer-haan I guess thoda slow bolta toh or mast rehta ...and thoda loud ....

Main- watch this "The Police works For Me "...

Abeer-you got it bhisi...

Anjana-Helloooooo.....

Main-ohh sorry continue...

Anjana-cbi is a whole different thing AP...

Main-i know but I hate different things...CBI sucks tumlog k liye kaam karne se achaa main UP police k sath kaam karun....

Abeer-lol...Mast tha...

Main-haina...

Abeer- haan but comedy waale dialogues thode fast bola kar like this """ tumlog k liye kaam karne se achaa main UP police k sath kaam karun....""""

Main-are gajab ....

Anjana- you guyss know you are in CBI headquarters right...?

Main-offcourse uppar aatey time niche board dekha tha CBI waala ...

Continued...

Update-7(And the bad luck continues)

​

Aunty coffee le aai thi humne cups liye or usko waapis bhejdiya Anjana ne..

Anjana- you'll get all the resources you need CBI k pass sab kuch available hai harr gadget harr luxury thing...

Main-lol you know meri net worth kitani hai Jo Maine khud kamaai hai...meri family ki net worth to chhodo meri personal net worth kitani hai maalum....

Anjana-1080 Crore INR Jo surendra ne tumhe diye...

Main-nope woh tab thi jab surendra ne mujhe Diye they uske hotels ,malls ,restaurants and hospitals lekin uske baad Maine Uska CEO Rishi ko banaaya you know Rishi right...?

Anjana- yeah yeah mastermind behind everything and business tycoon of yours .....

Main-So usne 1.5 saal mein uss 1080 crore ko 1680 crore kardiya hai ...kaafi corrupt loggon ko nikaalna padda kaafi cheejain back to normal karni paddi and we were ready to go...and uske alaawa meri family ki net worth kaa toh fir kya kehne and tumhaara annual budget hai 700crore so bataao kiske pass jyaada resources hain...

Anjana- AP think about it you'll get all the power...

Main-mere pass already bahot hai power ....its a waste of time Madam you can't change my mind...

Anjana- OK OK I can't beat you in talking...

Main-no offense but no one can...

Anjana- so here is the thing tum bus humein ek do cases mein help karo and I'll provide you anything you want from CBI ...

Main-anything...?

Anjana-yep anything...? Not from me :D from CBI...

Main-i was talking about CBI ....:D

Abeer-ok done ...

Main-kya done be..

Abeer-Ye deal done humlog 1-2 cases mein aapki help karenge lekin per case aap humko ek favour dengi whatever we need any info any tips any leak any government shaking news anything...

Anjana- done...

Abeer-ok done...

Anjana- here are the files for red john case...

Main- thanks...

Anjana- ek or important baat ...

Main-ji...?

Anjana-As red john ne Pakistan mein kaafi tabaahi machaai hai or last time jab woh gayab hua tab usne Pakistan mein he woh building jalaai thi toh jaise he Pakistani janta ko ye pata chala ki Red John waapis aaya hai toh unlog ne protest suru kardiya ki government kuch bhi karke usse maare yaa maarne mein help kare taaki unke saheed sathiyon ko shanti mille or protest kaafi badh gaya toh Pak pm ne apne pm ko call kiya or suggest kiya ki FIA (Federal Investigation Agency Pakistan) k kuch agents CBI ki help karein iss case mein...ab Humaare pm sahaab Pakistan k sath kaafi ache ristey caahtey hain or woh kaamyab bhi rahein hai as pehle se kaafi ache relations hain Pak and India k So unhone accept karliya ki FIA ki ek team humaari help karegi ...or unke kuch agents yahaan hain or hum unhe taaltey rehtey hain tum bhi ye kar shaktey ho bus unhe fake leads detey rehna no problem at all...

Main-dekha isliye bola I hate CBI ...if they want to help then sure main bilkul unhe mana Nahi karunga They can help Red John ek international threat hai specially Pakistan mein toh bahot Nukshaan kiya hai usne toh laajami hai ki log protest karein ...or I respect ki Pak and India k relations kaafi ache horahe hain ...So I will let them help us...

Abeer-gajab Speech bawa gajab....

Anjana- OK as you wish .

Main-so ma'am ijaajat caahta hun...buhbye...

Anjana- listen gimme your no. Jab jarurat hogi call karlungi...

Main-actually to be honest hum dono k pass he mobiles nahi hain ...because abhi settle Nahi hue hain or shopping karni baaki hai...

Anjana- OK OK no problem here take my no.....

Main-thanks...

Anjana- see you...

Ye bolke humlog wahaan se uthey or bahaar nikale...

Main-wassuppp aunty...

Receptionist-go to hell..

Main- abhi 1.5 saal udhar he tha ...

Abeer-lol...Shyanpatti karti hai budhiya....Thokdunga ....

Main-lol...

Receptionist-you...rascals....

Main-bhag jaanwar...

Woh aunty humein Marne doudi lekin tabtak hum dono lift mein pohanch chukey they...or fir seedha neeche...

Abeer- jhantu budhiya....

Main-tune Uss CBI waali ko haan kaahe bola be...

Abeer-abe gandu soch kitani info le shaktey hain hum unse Woh CBI hai unke pass Woh info millegi Jo hum soch bhi nahi shaktey or badle mein kya karna hai kuch cases mein help bhisi easy...

Main-Haan ye baat Toh hai...

Abeer-toh..Sab soch samjh k karta apun...Teri tarah Flirt par dhyaan nahi rakhta main...

Main-Maal gajab hai bhai kuch bhi bol caahe ...

Abeer- degi toh lega iski...

Main-nahi degi Toh bhi lelun main toh...

Abeeer-ahahahahhahah.....

Humlog niche aae parking se car nikaali or nikal paddey ghar ki taraf ...

Abeer-abe Ye Bypass se lele city k Andar se jaaega toh traffic gand maarlega....

Main-abe Nahi yaar jhant baraabar road hai woh bahaar waala....

Abeer- woh 2 saal pehle tha ab nahi hai ....bhosdk sarkaar apni hai yahaan ab...

AP-ye toh hai...rukk ye aage Jo jhant baraabar gaadi hai usko hataane de bhosdka chutiya kaise chala Raha hai ....

Or at last humlog City k outside pohanchey wahaan se ek road sidha haryana enter hota hai Jo kaafi sunshaan hai as kaafi Lamba padd jaata hai toh koi use nahi karta + chori wori hojaati hai idhar kaafi lekin humlog udhar se he nikale as bulletproof car hai So no tension at all ...andherra hochuka tha ...

Abeer- bhosdk angrejj koi Hindi gaana he chala le....

Main-jaa be gareeb aadmi chup chaap sojaa piche....

Abeer- gand marwa....

9:00 baje they and Humlog almost 70% raasta paar kar chukey they ki mereko ek Aurat dikhi Road par khaddi hui....

Abeer- ye kya kar reli hai idhar ...

Main-who cares ...

Abeer-lift toh Dede be bechaari akeli lag rahi hai...

Main- lift maange toh dun aise he khaddi rahi toh side se nikal lunga...

Maine car slow kardi or woh aurat waise he khaddi rahi or jaise he main uske close pohancha usne Hath uthaaya lift k liye ....

Abeer-abe abtoh rokk...

Main- bhosdk trap hoga koi gand marr jaaegi bharre bajaar mein ...

Abeer- mujhe toh kuch nahi dikhraha bhisi humko konsa trap rokklega be or kya maalum sachmein akeli ho shakal se toh seedhe ghar ki lag rahi hai...help karenge toh kya jaaega ...

Main-bhosdk bhutani hui toh ...

Abeer-chupbe gandu horror story thodi hai...

Main-lol...

Or finally Maine usko cross karke brake laga di...gaadi rukktey he woh aage ko aai...usne jeans or top pehna tha 26-27 ki age hogi dikhne mein theek thaak thi...

Woh aage aai Maine sheesha niche kiya ....

Main- hello...

Lady- hi kya aap meri help kar shaktey hain...

Main-yep sure but questions first tum yahaan kaise kyun kab or kaahe ko ho...

Lady- actually main Delhi se aai hun or mujhe aage jaana tha main taxi mein thi but woh driver kaafi nashe mein hogaya yahaan takk aatey aatey or kaafi rough driving karne laga isliye main uttar gayi or usko waapis bhejdiya...

Abeer -ohh don't worry please come in ...

Ye bolke jaanwar ne piche waala darwaaja khola or BC usne khola he tha ki kissi ne darwaaja pakada or usme se ek gun Andar aai...or ek aadmi bola..

Aadmi-"hath uppar""....

Or itana suntey he humaari car k 4on taraf 4 aadmi aagaye with banduks...normal local pistols thi unke pass...

Main-what the fuckkkkkkkk....

Abeer-thats fucked up ....

Continued...

"You’re fighting a war That I’ve already won."

Update-8(We Haawt)

​
Woh koi 25-30 ki age k 4 hattey kattey aadmi they jo shaayd experts lagrahe they mereko insab mein .... unlog ne humko niche utaara ....

Lady-cash ,gold silver ,watch, phones anything you have give it to Us....

Main- actually I have cash but no gold no phone no wallet or phones ...

Aadmi-juth matt bol saale thokdunga warna...

Main-check karle bhai gussa kyun karta hai ...

Unlog ne humein or fir cars ko check kiya toh unhe khaali 5000-6000 rupaaee mille Jo mere pass they....

Main-dekha told you ab jaaein...1000-1000 baantlena Sab ....gotta go now...

Aadmi-a bhosdk shyanpatti nahi kar...

Main- ek minute thoda andherra hai idhar lights mein aa or dhyaan se shakal dekh fir bata pehchaana yaa nahi humein...

Ye bolke hum cars k aage aae light k Andar toh in log ki gand fatt gayi...

Main-bhosdk gandu bhaago idhar se ab ....

Lady-kya hua rukk kyun gaye ...

Main-unki fatt gayi isliye...

Aadmi-y.ye AP or a..a.a..beer hain....

Lady-matlab...

Abeer- MATLAB lawda mera ...

Aadmi2- kya karein ab...

Main-chup chaap nikal lo or ye Sab chhod do toh behtar hai...

Aadmi1-Ye theek keh raha hai chalo humein befaltu kaa panga nahi caahiye...

Aadmi2- Abe abhi inko jaane diya toh hum jinda nahi bachne waale ye dhund k thokdenge humein , pata nahi hai kya inke baare mein ...

Aadmi3-sahi bola ye inko chhod diya toh hum pakka marrenge lekin abhi humaare pass mouka hai inko kidnap karke firoti maangtey hain ...

Aadmi1-saalo paagal hogaye ho kya bhenchod deva bhai se firoti maangoge tumlog saalo tumhaare sath sath Pura khaandaan marrega samjhe ...

Lady-inki gaadi leletey hain...

Main- lawda mera 2 crore + ki gaadi hai chori chakaari karo Par kamsekam aukaat mein rehkar karo ...

Abeer- are bhai hath niche karun kya hath dard kar raha bahot...

Aadmi3- car mein GPS hoga pakadey jaaenge...

Aadmi2-toh kya karein inhe chhod diya toh hum Sab gaye samjho...

Lady -toh maar detey hain...

Main-ahahahah maadarjaat kya Marrne k liye story suru ki hai kya Maine aise kaise maardoge ....

Aadmi2-Ye sahi bolrahi hai maarke laash fainkdetey hain humaara naam nahi aaega saikdon dushman hain inke humpar kon shakk karega bhalla ...

Maine jaanwar ko dheere se bola...

Main-bhosdk shit is getting serious kam se kam aise toh nahi marrna hai BC mereko...

Abeer-i got this tu buss gussa matt kariyo...

Main-abhi takk toh nahi aaraha aage kaa pata nahi...

Abeer-inko main dekhlunga tu gussa kaabu rakhiyo.....

Main-ok...

Abeer-so bahot hua tumlog kaa offer main apna offer deta hun ab jisko jinda rehna hai woh bandukk niche rakhdo turant baadmein fir mouka nahi dunga main ...

Unmein se ek toh piche ko hatt gaya Jo darr raha tha but baakiyon par koi khass assar nahi padda..

Main-3 vs 2 easy hai...

Abeer-3 vs 1 bhosdk tu kuch nahi karega chup chaap khadda reh...yaad rakhna jab takk main hun tu durr rahiyo ...bhulgaya kya uski baat ...

Main-tu sachmein believe karta hai woh Sab sach hai ...

Abeer- par risk he kyun Lena jab main hun yahaan. .

Main-ok OK ....

Aadmi3- chalaaki karega toh thokdunga....

Ye bolke woh aadmin humpar banduk taane aage badha toh Abeer ne ek jhatke se uske hath se bandukk chhinni or uske munh par dusre hath se punch diya or seconds mein usne dusre ki taang mein Goli daagdi woh chilaata hua niche girra or teesra gun uthaata tabtak uske munh par gun taan di Abeer ne ....

Abeer-trigger ki taraf ungali lejaaega usase pehle Teri khopaddi kholdunga ...

Usne turant apni gun niche daali or hath uppar karliye no. 1 punch se recover hua he tha ki Abeer ne uski gottiyon par laat di jisase woh ghutano par girra ...

Ye Sab Dekh k uss Ladki ki gand fatt gayi woh munh faade kabhi Abeer ko toh kabhi niche paddey apne sathiyon ko dekhne lagi...

Abeer- well that was quick....

Main-lawde ka quick reflexes kitane slow they Tere or bhosdk teesre ko turant Goli maardeni thi at least hath mein he sahi agar woh chala deta toh .....aise chance Nahi dene kaa...

Abeer- beta tu beshak better hai par main jyaada experienced hun usne aajtak kabhi Goli nahi chalaai hogi ....

Main-fir bhi chance kyun dena 4 no. Cut tere 6 out of 10...

Abeer- seriously bhosdk I deserve at least 7 ...or 7.5....

Main-aji lawda let's go now....

Abeer-inka kya karna hai ....

Main- chhod de be ab kon police k jhanjhat mein padega already nind aarahi hai bukh bhi lagi hai...

Abeer- isko hospital le jaana or agar aage se mujhe is road par koi vaardat milli tumhaari toh sidha khopaddi mein Goli maarunga...

Aadmi1-j.j.ji bhai...

Humlog gaadi mein baithey start ki or Abeer ne unki gun fainki waapis ...

Abeer-bubye take care...

Or uske baad humlog nikal gaye...

Main- maadarchod bachgaye...

Abeer- lawda jaise humein kuch hone waala tha aise chuttad log rojj millenge humein...

Main-woh toh hai par fir bhi bhai dhyaan rakha kar thoda common sense use kiya kar aise kaise gate kholdiya tune...

Abeer- actually main side story bhulgaya tha ki kya hota hai idhar or uppar se ye bhi bhoolgaya tha ki humbhi normal he hain chorron k liye toh ..

Main-haan BC...

Humlog 10 baje ghar pohanchey toh sablog dinner k liye baithey he they ....Full family (Bhai,Babhi ,Mangal,Rishi ,Ravi or Sam ) they Meenu serve kar rahi thi khaana...

Main-Wasssupp...

Babhi-tera munh tod dena hai Maine gadhe ...

Main-kya hua...

Mangal-abe kam se kam ek mobile toh lele bhai at least ....

Main-time nahi milla Rishi ko bola tha aaj shayad ...

Rishi-yo le aaya bhai....tera old no. Bhi chaalu karwaadiya same with Abeer...

Main-konsa mobile jaldi bata ...

Rishi-Ek google pixel 3xl hai Jo off course tu lega and Dusra one plus6t Abeer k liye...

Main-are gajab ...

Rishi-tere room mein haiga ....

Mangal-85000 kaa phone kon use karta hai bhai....

Main-apun karta hai.... Saale khood S9 rakha hai tune mujhe bolta hai mehnga hai ...

Mangal-fir bhi 60000 kaa he toh hai Tere waale se sasta....

Babhi-ek minute tumlog itane mehange phone kaa kartey kya ho ...I mean seriously itana show off AP ...

Main- main akela thodi hun babhi ye Sab k Sab k pass 50000+ k mobiles hain .....

Deva-shut up main befaltu paise waste nahi karta mera sasta waala hai....

Abeer- same mera bhi I guess 35000-40000 kaa he hai 50 se toh niche he hai....

Sam-main toh keypad waala rakhta hun...

Main-jutha kameena...

Babhi-whatever befaltu k show offs chup chaap khaana khaao ...waise tumlog itana late kaise hue...

Main-udhar CBI headquarters mein he time lag gaya babhi warna kab k aajatey humtoh....uppar se Traffic bahot tha aatey time ......

Deva-case milla ....?

Main-haao...sath mein FIA waale bhi....

Deva-pakistan se ...?haan mujhse mille they Woh ek baar CBI ki complaint ko leke..

Main-maine boldiya ki agar unko help karni hai toh beshak karein....

Deva-sahi kiya ache lage mereko bandey....

Main-hmmm...let's see......

Continued.....

Update-9(FIA-Federal Investigation Agency ~ Pakistan)

​
Dinner k baad Maine apna phone liya mast BC packing se khola gand faad look thi phone ki bhenchod full too paisa wasool apna sim usme daala or fir aaram se sogaya....

Subah meri nind babhi k aane se khulli...

Babhi-oye gadhe uth...

Main-kya hua...?

Babhi-call hai Anjali kaa le...

Main-itani subah subah ...

Babhi-10:00 baje hain gadhe ...

Main-subah he hai mere liye toh...laao...

Maine babhi se phone liya...

Main-Subah subah koi kaam dhanda nahi hai kya ...?

Anjali-wahi kar rahi sun ..apne sath koi FIA waale bhi hain kya Pakistan se ...?

Main-haan.....

Anjali- toh fir jaldi se Police Station aaja...

Main-kya hua...?

Anjali- yelog problem mein hain....

Main-FIa waale...?

Anajli-haan yahaan police station aae hain ...

Main- toh kardo solve kya dikkat hai...

Anjali-teri help caahiye aaja jaldi...

Main-ok OK aata hun 10-15 minutes mein ...

Call disconnected...

Main-babhi kon kon hai ghar ...

Babhi-Abeer he hai Mangal abhi abhi gaya hai party office...

Main-jaanwar ko bolo toh ready honeko tabtak main ready hojaata....

Babhi-ok...naasta..?

Main- aake karlunga .

Uske baas main fresh hoke niche aaya toh jaanwar already taiyaar baitha tha....

Abeer- time se uthaa kar be. ....

Main- abhi college jaane Lagunga tab utha karunga....Chal police station jaana hai FIA waalon kaa koi lafda hua hai....

Abeer- aaja..

Maine Mangal ko call kiya ...

Mangal -Ji sir...

Main-le bhosdk jhantu naye phone se pehla call tereko he kiya hai...

Mangal-bus dhanya hogaya main...

Main-woh toh hai he...

Mangal-kaam Bolbe gandu...

Main-Tu party office se kaam niptaake seedha police station aajiyo...

Mangal-kya hua...

main- woh FIA waalon kaa kuch lafda hogaya hai Anjali k pass aae hain woh log...

Mangal-ok pohanchta 20 minutes mein...

Main-ok..

Call disconnected...

Uske baad hum dono Maserati mein baithey or Police station k liye nikal paddey...

Main-waise jaanwar Reader log bolrahe ki Abeer ko bhi girlfriend deni caahiye...

Abeer- kya..?kon...?kaise readers..?

Main-kuch nahi flow flow mein nikal gaya ...I mean tereko GF caahiye kya...

Abeer- caahiye kaa kya matlab hai lodu agar caahiye hoti toh khud dhundaleta tu thodi dilwaaega mujhe GF ....

Main-chal dhundle tu dhund le...

Abeer- ye BC police station ka bhi renovation karwaaliya kya mast lagrela hai pencho...

Main-yep ..

Humlog uttare toh bahaar Rajat 2-4 pantar log ko dhamkaa raha tha ....

Main-Kaise ho Rajat Saar....

Rajat-mast AP bhai apni sunao...

Main-bus badhiya... Kya kiya inlogne...

Rajat-Girls college k bahaar bakchodi pell rahe they...

Main-bhenchod jhant k Baal theek se aae nahi challe aashiqi maarne ....2 meri Taraf se bhi lagao bhenchod ko...

Rajat-jarur ...Sab Andar hain main aata inko niptaake....

Humlog jaise he Andar enter hue toh saamne hall mein Anjali and team or sath mein 3 unknown faces they jinmein ek 40-45 kaa aadmi dusra 26-27 age kaa ladka and teesri ek cute se 21-22 age ki Ladki Jo traditional attire mein gajab cute lagrahi thi...lekin un 3no k cehre kaafi sad they jissase woh Ladki Or jyaada cute lag rahi thi...

BC kahin ye Nayi heroine toh nahi story ki...

Lawda mera heroine BC pehle bahot hain line mein heroine k liye ...

Lekin jaise he hum Andar enter hue toh whaan mojudd saikdon hawaldaars ,attendants,SI's ,SHo and inspectors or baaki Sab humein dekhtey he apni seat se khaddey hue or taaliyaan bajaane lage...

Abeer-ye kya bakchodi haibe...

Main- respect bhosdk kitana Sab kiya apan ne inlog k liye or fir gaya hogaye toh ab thanks k sath sath welcome bhi kar rahe hain..

Abeer- gajab BC...

Main-thankyou thankyou thankyou bhailog..

Uske baad woh Sab baithey or humlog Andar enter hue...

Anjali-noice entry ...

Main-Swag haiji apna...

Anjali-woh Sah chhodo ye hain FIA agents inka naam hai Javed ye iss team k captain hain ye hain Agent Jamaal or ye Hain Nazia.....

Toh ye sabse bade waala tha Javed Jo inka leader tha and Dusra ladka tha Jamaal and woh Ladki thi Nazia shayad new he aai thi FIa mein...

Anjali-Javed ji ye hain AP and with him He is Abeer....

Javed-Sir please help us sir ..I promise humlog waapis challe jaaenge Pakistan if you help us here...

Main-calm down calm down aaram se bataaiye hua kya hai...

Woh kuch bolta tabtak Mangal bhi Wahaan aagaya ...

Mangal-kya hua...?

Main-Javed Ji aaram se bataaiye...

Javed-Humaare boss ne humein India bheja ye kehkar ki Humlog CBI ki madad karenge red John case mein lekin yaahan aae toh dekha ki CBI waale humein involve he nahi karna caahtey they ..woh humessa humein juthi leads detey taaki humlog case k bich mein naa aaein they always behaved rudely with us......humne socha ki chalo hum kuch toh help kar he rahe hain but jab realise hua ki ye Sab juth tha toh humne socha ki kyun naa hum khud he apne bases par investigations karke CBi ko prove karein ki Humlog kaam k laayak hain ...

but aaj investigation k douraan humaara sathi Abdul kuch jyaada he deep chala gaya ,humlog aaj kuch gundey loggon ko investigate kar rahe they ki unlog ko pata chal gaya ki humlog Pakistan se hain toh unhone Abdul ko kidnap karliya or humein dhamki di ki agar hum log jaldi se India chhod kar nahi gaye toh woh Abdul ko maardenge ...Woh bus ek young Saa ladka hai sir uska koi dosh nahi hai please help him sir...

Main-chill chill don't worry we'll help you ...Jaldi he aapka sathi aapke hoga...Anji where is he...

Anji-pooja ne uska mobile track kiya hai uske according wohlog ne Abdul ko woh apne RG Nagar ki woh basti mein rakha hai ...

Main-konsi basti...

Anjali-are woh haina jahaan ye gundey mawali ,chorr uchake rehtey hain...uss basti kaa naam bhi tha main bhoolgayi...

Mangal- "Gundaghar"....

Anjali- exactly Gundaghar basti...

Main-what the fuck is this name...

Mangal-Maine thodi rakha hai be...ab Gundey logg hain Washington DC toh rakhenge nahi ...

Main-woh chhod apna koi contact hai kya udhar...

Mangal-haan woh mota sambhu hai Wahaan ....

Main- badhiya contact no. millega uska...?

Mangal-rukk kissi se Lena padega ...

Mangal ne uska no. Liya or Sambhu ko call kiya usne confirm kiya ki kissi ek bandey ko yahaan rakha hai kuch loggon ne humne usse kahaa ki humein wahin mille Woh....

Main-lets go guys...

Anjali- kuch force lun sathmein ...

Main-are naa naa ab aise aison k liye bhi force lenge toh kaise chalega apna dhanda...

Humlog bahaar aae Mangal new car mein aaya tha new chamchamaati VolvoXC90 bhenchod jehar thi jehar MUV ...kya look tha BC gaadi kaa uppar se 7 seater...

Main-ye kitane ki li be...

Mangal-1.20crore....2 weeks pehle he li hai...

Main-gajab ...gand faad Di BC main leke jaaun ye wahaan takk...?

Mangal-sure puch kya rela bhosdk.. main Maserati lejaata..

Main-lejaa bindaas...waise ek or 7 Seater car caahiye humein ...

Mangal-Matlab...

Main-abe team k liye alag alag cars mein swag naa banta 2 luxury 7 seaters hon toh Humlog Sab aaram se aaenge...

Mangal-woh toh hai ..ek or hai waise Rishi ne Tere liye li thi...

Main-konsi..

Mangal-woh nahi maalum Tujhe bataaya Nahi usne...

Main-bataa raha tha Maine kahaa baadmein bataadiyo abhi Maserati he theek hai...

Mangal-aaj chalke dekhtey konsi hai...

Main-apni RR kaa kya hua be...

Mangal-RR Jack(yaad haina Jack sabko Abeer kaa assistant cum pa cum Abeer part2) k pass hai ab ...

Main-sahi hai chalo ....

Anjali or Baaki log bhi bahaar aagaye Main Abeer Anjali ,pooja Javed ,Nazia or Abdul VOLVO mein baithey ....Mangal ,Ajay or Jiya Maserati mein baithey...

Or Humlog nikal paddey location ki taraf...

Continued...

Update-10(The Swag)

​
Anjali-chinta matt karo Aaplog AP ne kahaa hai toh Abdul jaldi he sahi salaamat aajaega ...

Javed-thankyou Sir .. We will go back to pak after that...

Main-unhunn ! Don't worry you guyss can stay here ...Tumhaare Desh k loggon ki umeed tumpar tikki hain so stay here and help us ...Koi problem tumhe nahi hogi uska promise main karta hun...

Jamaal-But how.. Humein laga tha CBI runs everything around here...

Main-naa naa I run everything around here...chinta matt karo main keval dikhne mein chhota lagta hun lekin hun Nahi ...

Humlog wahaan pohanchey toh ye ek bar type tha jiski shakal Bollywood k 90's k bars jaise lag rahi thi uske bahaar 2-4 Prsotitutes khaddi thi unke pass 2-4 aadmi daru peeke jhumrahe they...or wahi gate par Sambhu khadda tha mota bhainse jaisa shareer or kala rang bhenchod Koyle kaa paid kahin kaa... Toh humlog uske pass gaye...

Sambhu-Parnaam sahaab log...

Main-parnaam parnaam kya khabbar hai...

Viju-Sahaab pakka toh nahi but Mere hissab se ye Viju kaa kaam hai unlog ne he ek bandey ko kidnap kiya hai aaj ...viju or uske log Andar he hain bhai koi Civilians nahi hai aaram se tapkaa shaktey sabko...

Main-hatt be chutiya samjha hai kya ...ab aise cockroaches ko maarenge hum yahi kaam rehgaya hai.....lekin haan agar tereko Viju ko tapkaane kaa hai toh bindaas tapkaadey humlog aise react karenge jaise kuch hua he naa ho...

Sambhu-Are nahi nahi bhai majaak kar raha tha ...

Main-laga tha mujhe bhi...Javed bhai aap Andar jaao check karo wahi hai kya and fikar not we got your back...

Javed-ji...

Ye bol woh teeno Andar enter hue or unke piche piche hum... Andar lights dim thi or slow music chalraha tha or ek jhantu se sofa par Baitha tha woh Viju apni 2 maal Rakhilon k sath...or uske agal bagal 15-16 aadmi they Jo I am sure uske chamche honge ...Humlog ek kone mein hogaye or woh teeno aage gaye or aage jaatey he Viju ne unhe dekh liya and usne turant music bandh karwaaya ...Woh hansta hua unke pass aaya...

Viju-bola tha tumlog ko main salla bola tha ki chale jaana warna marroge Sab k Sab...ab bhugto...

Ye bolke usne apni gun nikaal li...I am sure ki woh chalaata nahi as uski gand mein utana dum nahi hai ...

Viju-bolo bhailog thokdun...

Mangal-Aise kaise thokdega bhenchod halwa hai kya...humlog kya idhar YouTube videos banaane ko aae hain bhalla... BC bol raha thokdega aise kaise bhosdk...

Ye bolke humlog ne centre mein entry maari or humein Wahaan dekh k Viju ki gand fatt gayi...

Main-Bhosdk Durr hatjaa unse warna ye bandukh tere wahaan daaldunga jahaan Suraj nahi ugtaa...

Anjali-eeewwwww! ....

Main- sorry but filhaal k liye yahi dialogue aaya dimag mein...

Abeer ne Viju ko laat di jisase woh side mein jaa girra...

Abeer- bhosdk baithney ko kon bolega...

Viju-aa.a.a.a.iye bhai aaiye...

Ye sunke uski female friends sofa se uthi or humlog sofas par baithey ....

Ye dekh FIa waale bhi surprised they hona bhi caahiye aakhirkaar AP kaa first impression hota he aisa hai...

Viju-b.b.b.b.bhai aaplog yahaan...

Main-wasssupp...bus tera haal chaal puchney chala aaya log bolrahe they Jaundice hua hai tereko ...ab kaisa hai dawaai leta haina time se.......

Viju-w..w woh theek ...

Main-chup bhosdk...lawde jaisi shakal hai or hath mein revolver rakhta hai bhosdk aise log hotey hain Jo Train k horn ko sunke taaliyaan bajaatey hain jhantu kahin kaa...ye bata Abdul kahaan hai...

Viju-m.m.main nahi j.jaanta bhai...

Main-teri maa ki chinni kam chaaey...

Ye bolke Maine Deagle nikaali jisse dekhtey he Viju ki already fatti gand or jyaada fattgayi...

Viju-.bhbhbhai maarna nahi maarna nahi...a leke aao usko...

Ye bolke uska ek aadmi turant Andar gaya or apne sath ek 24-25 age kaa young bodybuilder hatta katta lekin innocent looking bandey ko leke aaya...ji haan wahi tha Abdul ...usse dekhtey he FIA waalon ki khussi kaa thikaana naa raha ...

Uske cehre par kuch chott k nishaan they I mean usko dhoya tha kissi ne...

Main-Abdul kissne hath lagaaya tumhe...

Ye suntey he Abdul ne viju ki taraf ungali uthaai...

Main-Beat his ass ...fod daal saale ko...

Abdul-no sir it's okkk ...

Main-kya baat karta hai yaar badla toh le...

Abdul-no sir I am good...

Abeer-Abdul bhai tu bole toh main lelun badla...

Main-nahi bilkul nahi maarna nahi hai usko be...

Abeer- bus thoda saa Twist...

Or main kuch bolta usase pehle Abeer ne Viju kaa right hand pakada or apne dono hathon mein fansaake ek jhatke mein Todd diya...ab Viju bechaara chilaaye..

Main-what the fuck...

Abeer- ye new technique faadu hai boss...

Main-fuck you bitch...

Main-so bhailog Sab suno jitane bhi gundey mawaali hai yahaan ,Ye Sab humaare mehmaan hai or humaare yahaan mehmaan bhagwaan samaan hota hai ,tumhaara kya bigaada inhone Jo tumlog ne kidnap kiya isko BC Ek taraf sarkaar India pak ki relationship badhiya karne par jorr de rahi hai or tumlog ye ghatiya harkatein kar rahe India Pakistan ek he hain bich mein boundaries hui toh kya hua...Or dhyaan se sunlo kissi ne inki taraf aankh bhi uthaai aage se toh bina warning thokdunga... Thankyou have a nice day...

Ye bolke humlog wahaan se khaddey hue or bahaar ko aae ab Javed bhai or baaki lage thankyou thankyou khelne or pehli baar Maine uss Ladki ki awaaj suni jab usne mujhe thankyou kahaa kaafi cute si awaaj thi uski...

Beta bolraha hun main isko heroine lele awaaj bhi cute hai dekh or kya lega ab....

Bhag bhosdk shut up...

Humlog Cars mein aae ab Abeer drive kar raha tha Javed uske sath baitha tha aage... Jamaal ,Abdul or Nazia middle mein and main or Anjali aaram se piche...

Abeer-abe tum dono ek sath matt baitha karo BC....

Main-kyun be...

Abeer- BC ab tum lagoge flirting waali bakwass karne bore maaroge sabko...

Main-dekha anjali humaara pyaar hajam nahi hota loggon se...

Anjali-i know I know jealous log...

Abeer- hogaye BC suru...

Uske baad Javed ne Abdul ko bataaya ki kaise kya hua...

Main-A jaanwar...

Abeer- haan...

Main-Woh Ruhi k hospital lele...Abdul ko dawaai wagairaah lagwaadetey...

Abeer-ok...

Abdul-arrey no problem sir I am good iski jarurat nahi hai...

Main-first of all no sir ...second tum theek nahi ho lekin haan ho jaaoge jaldi he ....or abse tum team kaa part ho toh tumhaari safety meri jimmedaari hai...

Javed-waise whose the boss here...

Anjali- Not me meri taraf matt dekho yaar I work for AP....

Main-our boss is Deva bhai and our team captain is Anjali daahling...

Javed-Deva sir Woh politician the super power of north India....

Main-yess yes exactly...

Javed-humlog mille they unse bahot ache insaan hain woh kissi ne bataaya humein ki cbi k against wahi help kar shaktey keval toh Humlog ne CBI ki complaint ki unse ...unhone help ki toh CBI waale kuch din k liye Soft they but firse wahi Sab suru hogaya ....

Main- CBI sucks men....Deva bhai is our elder brother...

Javed-wow matlab aapki puri family he helpful hai...

Main-bhai is god yaar humlog unke baraabar mein kuch nahi...

Humlog Ruhi k hospital pohanchey or ab baari thi maar khaane ki...Main ekdum ready tha thappad ,ghussa, laat Jo bhi aae uske liye...

Continued...

Update-11(The Friendship Bonds)
​

Humlog Andar aae Hospital k toh receptionist ne bataaya Ruhi Apne cabin mein hai or humlog chall paddey uske cabin mein ..or gate par he Maine or Abeer Ne baaki Sab ko aage kiya or humlog unke piche aagaye...

Main-Anjali tera kaam hai usko shant karwaane kaa samjhi warna tu toh gayi...

Anjali-i will try...

Or ye Kehke humne Andar entry li hum bilkul chupp gaye they unke piche...

Ruhi sabko wahaan dekh k surprised thi...

Ruhi-OMG aaj toh humaare bhaag khulgaye kitane bade bade log aaein hain yahaan par ...

Anjali Ruhi se Galle milli...

Ruhi-OH ! God Inko toh chott lagi hai ...

Anjali-yep...isko leke he aaein hain ...

Ruhi-ruko main nurse ko bulwaati hun...

Ye bolke usne Intercom par call kiya ...

Anjali-Waise inse milli yaa nahi tum...

Ruhi-kinse..?

Main-humse...

Ye bolke main aage aaya toh Ruhi ko bhi shock laga Lekin woh bahot jaldi recover hui or seconds k hissab se ek punch mere munh par laga ...BC aaj maalum chala Ladki log mein kitani power hoti hai...BC Pura tooth set hillgaya ...

Abeer-ek meri taraf se bhi maaro he deserve it aise kaise chala gaya ye...

Ruhi-shut up...

Or ye boltey he Ruhi ne ek punch Abeer k pait mein maara BC mere munh par uske pait mein usko kuch khass farak nahi padda but action aisa kiya usne maano gand fatt gayi ho...saala overacting ki dukaan...or FIA waale bechaare dekh rahe humein clueless ki ajeeb gandu log hain ...

Main-what the fuck khoon....

Ruhi-what...khoon kahaan...

Main- mere munh mein...itana jorr se koi maarta hai kya yaar...

Ruhi-i am sorry yaar really really sor.... Ek minute kyun sorry you deserve it Mann toh kar raha ek or dun par mera hath jyaada pain kar raha hai...

Main-i missed you yaar...

Or ye suntey he Ruhi mere Galle se lag gayi ...this is called friendship dude...

Ruhi-Kaisa hai tu...

Main- perfectly fine ...tu bata...

Ruhi-I missed you guyss yaar...kamsekam bataa k toh jaatey...

Main-fir wahi baat agar bataa k jaata toh itane time thodi reh paata...

Uske baad Ruhi jaanwar se Galle Milli...

Abeer-Ohh finally tera gussa kam hua...

Ruhi-i missed you too...

Uske baad Ek nurse aai usne Abdul ko dawaai wagairaah lagaai or Tabtak Ruhi ne humse jaankaari li kya hua kya nahi 1.5 saal mein...

Main-ab khuss hai...

Ruhi-i am so happy that you defeated Vertigo... You are the first person to do so in whole world...

Main-i know woh Rehab waala doctor bhi yahi bola tha ki I am the first one ...

Uske baad thodi normal chit chat hui...

Main-A Ruhi tera woh farmhouse haina meri haweli ki side mein woh abhi bhi khaali he padda hai kya...

Ruhi-konsa woh Jo Tere gaon ki side hai woh...?

Main-haan...

Ruhi- haan khaali he padda hai ...

Main- mereko caahiye woh ...bol kitane mein degi ..

Ruhi- Oho ho ho Bill gates sir ...

Main-Joking..

Ruhi-tu lele yaar terese paise leke kya karungi...Use kar jabtak tera Mann kare...

Main- thanks..

Ruhi-waise Teri dozens haweli hain farmhouses hain toh mera Farm house kyun..?

Main-Actually these are my friends From Pakistan and they are working on a case with us lekin abhi kissi hotel mein rukkey hain yelog Jo humaare dono head office se durr hain ...

Ruhi-dono office konse...

Main-Lol..are ek toh haweli hai he and second police headquarters...

Ruhi-koi ni lele tere friends mere friends...but return mein party caahiye meko...

Main-done..

Ruhi-date decide kar Sab ek mast si party kartey hain...

Main-sure...

Ruhi-bhullna nahi...Anjali isko yaad dilwaadiyo...

Anjali-i will....

Ruhi-waise konsa case hai filhaal...

Main-Red john :D...

Ruhi-what the fuck ....matlab shant toh baithna he nahi hai harr case Tere puraane waale se double dangerous hota hai I mean seriously yaar....

Main-kya karein jab dusre kuch nahi kar paatey tabhi humein bulaatey log..

Ruhi-but seriously yaar you guyss should catch him soon woh khulla ghumraha iska matlab koi bhi safe nahi hai...

Main-hmmm..lagtey hain uspar bhi...

Tabtak Nurse ne Abdul ko chamkaa diya ..or humlog Sab nikalne lage wahaan se...

Javed-thanks doctor...

Ruhi-no problem at all..

Main-buhbye daahling...

Ruhi-bye haweli aati wahaan baithke baat kartey theek se...

Humlog waapis cars mein aagaye...

Javed-AP bhai Humlog hotel mein theek hain no need to trouble yourself...

Main-isme trouble kaisi Javed bhai ab toh team hain humlog toh ye Sab chalta rahega...or uppar se woh hotel aapka bahot durr hai bahot time waste hoga aane jaane mein he isliye ye better hai or apna konsa paise lagna hai free he toh hai ...

Thodi naa nukkur k baad wohlog maangaye wahaan rehne k liye...

Main-ek maid and ek driver with a car wahaan miljaaega Aapko...aaram se raho tension free agar koi problem ho toh anjali ko call kardo...

Javed-thanks AP..

Main- another thing ,let me make one thing simply clear agar hum red john ko pakadtey hain toh he is not your and also not ours he is dead ...koi arrest wrrest nahi hoga ...badle mein hum Pakistani Public k liye ek open letter likhenge jisme ye Sab Saaf likha hoga ki aapne humaari bahot help ki without you guyss red john ko hum nahi pakad paatey...

Javed-Bus yahi kaafi hai sir...

Main-or jaisa ki mujhe pata hai aapke seniors ko aaplog se koi matlab nahi hai as unhone keval time pass k liye yahaan bheja hai Aapko taaki log bhadke nahi...

Javed-ji..

Main-lekin fir bhi aap unhe case related koi info Nahi denge ...

Javed-Ji...

Main-I trusted you guyss with all this so I hope main ye decision leke pachtaaunga nahi...

Javed-Surely not AP...

Main-Ok so ye hotel aagaya aapka ...samaan pack karo 1 ghantey mein driver gaadi leke aajaega uske sath aaplog farmhouse par aajana...

Javed-Ok...Thanks for the help AP...

Main-no problem at all...

Uske baad wohlog gaadi se uttare ab gaadi mein keval main Anjali or Abeer he bache ...

Anjali-You trust those guyss...

Main-i think so ..bhai ne bhi kahaa tha ache log hain mujhe bhi theek he lage I guess we should give them a chance....What about you :?:

Anjali-Same I think they are good....Jaanwar kya bolta hai...

Abeer-Lets give them a chance...

Main-ok then. ..

Humlog Ne ACP madam ko Station drop kiya he tha ki bhai kaa call aagaya...

Main-ji bhai....

Deva-Puri team ko leke ghar aaja ...

Main-abhi ...

Deva-haan ...

Main- kya hua sab theek toh hai......

Deva-all good thodi baatein karni hain...

Main-aatey Bhai....

Continued......

Update-13(The Intros)
​
Andar babhi Or Anjali Ami k thobde par dawaai laga rahe they or Ami kuch bataa rahi thi unko...

Ami-AP is like my godfather I know main age mein usase badi hun and all but woh meri life mein uss time aaya jab mere pass koi options nahi bachey they my life was almost over but he came and healed my life he saved my life and gave me a reason to live I am so thankful I got friends like him and Abeer...I owe my life to him...

Ispar Sab thoda emotional type hogaye najaane kyun unko kaafi touching lagi ye baat..

Main-she is my bodyguard you know...

Ye sunke sabne mereko khaa jaane waali najaron se dekha ..

Anjali-Shut up...kuch bhi bolta hai...

Babhi-Raipta khaaega thobdey par...

Main -arey puchlo usase caahe a Ami bata toh...

Ami -Yep kind of his bodyguard you can say...:D...

Main-lo ab bolo...

Anjali-Shut up...

Main-majaak kar rela tha:D...

Fir kaafi derr takk baat chit challi wahaan par sablog Ami se comfortable they koi darr koi shakk kissi k Mann mein nahi tha jiske do reasons they no.1 woh thi he aisi duniya k liye killer or hum Sab k liye loyal friend...No.2 uski guarantee Maine Lee thi toh sablog aankh bandh karke uspar Vishwash kar shaktey they ..or ye kaafi achi baat thi ki Sab ghull mill jaaein kyunki isko toh last takk jaana hai :D...

Or kaafi derr baad jab Anjali ko police station se call aaya toh woh and baaki nikal liye shayad koi case tha....

Bhai bhi party office k liye nikal gaye ...

Main-Laa tereko room dikhaadeta tera aaja...

Ami-By the way babhi Ji this house is so cute...

Main-this is called haweli itana bada house dekha hai kabhi tune jaahil ganwaar....

Babhi-Tu maar khaaega beta aaj...Ami select whichever room you like...

Main-Abeer iska samaan uthaa toh...

Uska samaan leke hum teeno uppar aae mere room k left mein Ravi kaa room tha or right kaa khaali tha wahin Ami ko bhejne waala tha main...isliye humlog uppar gaye room khola or uska samaan rakha...

Ami-Wow!this room is huge and so cool...

Main-I know...woh chhod tu idhar kaise ...?

Ami-bola toh tha ki I will find you...tu kahin bhi jaa tujhe dhund he lungi main...

Main-fir bhi ittani jaldi....

Ami-I am smart...By the way nice backup story back there....

Main-i know I am smarter then you... Listen yaad rakhna tera only challenge hai yahaan adjust hona ye woh Sab nahi hai ki jisko Mann kiya thok diya jo milla uska hath Todd diya ye Sab nahi challega ...agar adjust nahi hui toh tu waapis jaaegi....

Ami-jarurat nahi hai uski...now can I hug you guyss...I missed you guys so so so so much....

Main-no hugging at all...

Ami-ok thankyou...

Ye bolke woh merese Galle milli ....

Main- Met my Bhai and babhi....

Ami-Yep your babhi is so cute and adorable yaar woh toh even meri side bhi leti hain aajtak kissi ne meri side nahi Lee I love her ..

Main-shut up...Sun Mujhse jyaada unlog par trust kar shakti hai tu ...aage kai baar aisi situations aaengi ki tumhe ek ko choose karna hoga yaad rakhna humessa unlog ko choose karna ...bhai and Babhi are like god to me....

Ami-i will die before going against you...

Main-That was an order....or chhod mujhe ab sans nahi aaraha hai...

Fir woh Abeer se Galle milli...

Abeer-I told him ki tu jaldi aaegi...

Ami- you know me dude I am the smartest one in the room...

Main- aham -aham...

Ami-ohh!sorry second smartest..

Main- better....Ab sun sabko tu jaanti he hai Kon kaisa hai kon k karta hai wagairaah wagairaah Anjali is a Police officer as you know ...

Ami-yeah...

Main-toh main tujhko uske sath bhejunga woh tujhe Sab seekha degi yahaan kaa atmosphere, discipline kaise behave karna hai + tu cases mein help kar shakti hai uski...

Ami-ok sir anything else...

Main- rest le ...or yaad rakh Jo Maine samjhaaya...

Ami-Sure....tera room kidhar par hai...

Main-Side mein ...

Ami-ok ...

Main-agar disturb kiya toh munh fod dunga ...

Uske baad main or Abeer bahaar aagaye ...

Abeer-abe tension naa le woh Sab dekhlegi...

Main-lets hope for the best...

Uske baad main or Abeer shopping k liye gaye or bharr bharr k kapde and shoes le liye..... Insab mein he aaj ka din nikal gaya meri marksheet bhi aachuki thi toh kal admission k liye jaana tha college mein...

Update-14(College-1)

​
Isliye main subah jaldi utha or chakka chakk ready hogaya ...as you know babhi ko showoff bilkul passand nahi hai fir bhi Maine aaj aaj Maserati le jaane ki permission le li babhi se...

Naastey k badd hum teeno car mein sanwaar hue or nikal paddey full swag se college ki taraf ...

Main-Ab bataao college mein kya kuch program hai...Kon kya hai kab hai kahaan hai....

Sam-college mein bahot gandmasti chalti hai be...sun Rohit ne iss baar Presidential Election nahi lada as Mangal ne mana kiya tha taaki dusron ko chances mille ,toh naya President aaya hai powerful background se hai woh ... ab sun couples k baare mein Teri ex Sana Lucky ki current hai ,Divya k sath Ajit set hai woh Riya kaa bhai Ajit ,Ashish or ACP ki laundiya Arushi set hain ,Ritu ne bhi new bf dhund liya hai but utana serious relationship nahi hai Akshat naam hai ladke kaa ...

Main-bhen k lawde Sab set hain ...or tum dono...

Sam-hatt lawda apana moto bhoolgaya kya 1 glass dudh k liye koi gaaein (cow)thodi baandhta hai....

Main-j baat...

Sam-ab baari aai Riya ki toh tension naa le woh abhi single hai but uske piche bhi Ek londa padda hai Abhi naam hai current college president wahi hai...Riya utana bhaav nahi deti usko but woh hath dhoke piche padda hai....

Main-who gives a phakk men ...

Sam-ek do new characters bhi hain jinko jaake dekhliyo tu..baaki Sab jaananey laayak nahi hai....

Main-toh Abhi ye president hai new....

Sam-haan or Koi khaas banda ladda nahi election toh jeetgaya ye ..Ashish lucky Ajit or unki girlfriends ussi ko support kartey Sab...

Main- sahi hai BC ...

Sam-college wahi log chalaatey woh humse panga nahi letey or naa hum unki gand fodtey...

Main-Kull milaake college kaa scene sahi hai...ek kaam kar saare contacts transfer kardey Tere phone se Jo important hain..

Sam-laa...

Thodi derr baad humlog college pohanchey BC hulliya he bigad gaya tha college kaa main gate k bahaar he uss jhant baraabar President k posters lage they jispar jhant baraabar slogans likhe they...Maine Rohit ko call kiya...

Main-Wassup biatch...

Rohit-oh my gaawd finally mereko yaad kiya tune...

main- aatey he busy hogaya tha yaar time nahi milla bilkul bhi uppar se mobile wagairaah nahi tha or naa he no. Tha tera yaad or no. miltey he tereko yaad kiya ...

Rohit -Kahaan hai..

Main- college k bahaar he hun aaja tu gate par...

Rohit-aaraha hun 10 minutes mein, ghar se nikala hun abhi...

Main-chal tabtak admission leleta main ...

Rohit-admission mein dikkat hogi I guess...

Main-kaaeko be..

Rohit-principal strict hai...

Main-gand fod dunga bhosdk Tere principal ki...

Rohit-usase pehle deva bhai se baat karliyo principal thoda high level kaa aadmi hai ...kaafi contacts hain iske...

Main-aisa kya...

Rohit-dekhliyo Tere hissab se...

Main-ok...

Call disconnected...

Main- bhosdko principal k baare mein bataana bhool he gaye ...

Ravi- sorry ye toh BC skip he hogaya tha ...

BC ye toh badi film hai opposition kaa supporter hai Or ek Samaaz Sevi bhi, kaafi support hai iske pass or contacts bhi kaafi high hain iske...uppar se ek respected personality hai ...public welfare k liye kaafi kaam kiye hain toh local support bhi hai...central government mein bhi iske suggestions chaltey hain...

Main-iski maa kaa Burj Khalifa ye kahaan se aagaya ab story mein...last edit mein daaldiya hoga BC....

Ravi-chup be gandu ...

Main- let's see pehle main baat karleta hun usase fir dekhenge Agar baat nahi bani toh ...

Sam-chal humlog class jaatey hain tabtak...

Main-jaao bye...

Sam-bye...

Ravi-see u...

Undono k jaane k baad main car parking mein leke gaya jahaan BC lovers point bana hua tha kaafi saare couples idhar udhar khaddey they Maine gaadi park ki toh BC sabki aankhein car par he rukk gayi Issi liye toh leke aaya tha BC car...fir car mein se main uttara or mujhe dekh k wohlog or shocked they BC as puraane students toh mujhe bahot ache se jaantey hain kyunki kaafi kand kiye hain college k andar past mein...unmein se kuch ne hath uthaake wave kiya kuch ne hello bola kuch ne namstey bhi kiya but mujhe unke faces se laga ki jyaada khuss they nahi wohlog mujhe dekh k reason maybe ye tha ki main kaafi time takk gayab tha or ab waapis aake in Sab ki gand fodne waala tha isliye inki pehle he fatt gayi thi ..Isliye lawde jaisa munh banaake dekh rahe they mujhe bhen k lawde.....

Main parking se bahaar aaya toh kaafi log mujhe dekh k khuss they kaafi surprised they and kaafi ki gand jall gayi thi Jo unke cehron se saaf dikhaai de raha tha ...lekin mera kuch nahi ukhaad shaktey they woh isliye main seedha principal k office ki taraf chal diya or BC jhant baraabar log ghurrtey rahe mereko ...or meri gand tab marri jab mujhe pata chala ki principal kaa office ab uss jagah nahi hai jahaan pehle tha ...

Main-bhen k lawddo offices bhi koi shift karta hai kya ...puchna padega kissi se....

Mere saamne do ladke khaddey they Jo kitab leke koi doubts clear karwaa rahe they or unki doubts clear kar rahi thi ek cute si maal Ladki jokes apart bhenchod gajab Sundar dikhrahi thi woh Ladki aankhon par chasma kaale Baal medium height slim trim sareer kaafi cute thi woh...

Toh kya ye heroine hai bhai...

Main-abe gandmarre gand mein daal le heroine bhosdk apna type naam ki bhi koi cheej hoti hai BC ab najaane kitani cute Ladkiyaan hain iss college mein toh sabko heroine lega kya be...

But ye bahot cute hai....

Main- agreed but apne type ki nahi hai isliye no heroine...

Main uss group k pass gaya ..

Main-hello bhai ye principal office kidhar par hai...

Ye sun unlog ne meri taraf dekha or unmein se ek ladke kaa thobda mujhe thoda jaana pehchaana laga...

Ladka1-AP bhai aap..

Main-yo wassup...autograph lega...

Ladka-pehchaana mujhe ...

Main- actually 50-50 tera face kidhar toh bhi dekhela lag rela hai but naam yaad nahi...

Ladka-Main Anshul ...

Main-ek second Tu Ruhi kaa bhai hai ...

Ladka-Haan..

Main-Oh great yaad aagaya tumhaare ghar aaya tha tab milla tha terese ...

Anshul-haan...Finally aap aa he gaye ..

Main-Yo aana he padda...abtoh college mein bhi aa jaaunga ...

Anshul- That is great news...waise bhi college mein ab taanasaahi kaa Raj chalta hai aap he sambhall lo ...

Main-yo dekhenge kya dikkat hai...ye toh bata Principal office kidhar hai...pehle toh yahin hota tha...

Anshul-aao main chhod deta Aapko...

Main-thanks men...

Anshul-Waise meet my friends ye hai Sunil and Ye Hai Mouni...

Main-hi ...nice to meet you...

Mouni-Same...

Sunil- Hello bhai...

Continued....

Update-15(College-2)
​

Anshul mereko sath leke chal diya or sath mein Sunil or Mouni bhi...

Main-ye harr jagah poster lagaane ki permission kon deta haibe ...

Anshul-KON kya bhai President Abhi daalta hai khudki permission se ...

Main- bahot sahi....

Anshul-ussi ki chalti hai bhai yahaan sab ...Jo usko karwaana hota hai uske liye woh college bandh karwaadeta hai hadtaal karwaadeta hai. .....

Main-Hmm Rohit ko waapis leke aana padega...

Anshul-Mana kardetein hain Rohit bhai harr baar ab toh kaafi lambe time se college mein bhi nahi aae hain...ye Abhi k supporters dikkat detey unko...

Main- woh isliye kyunki uske hath baandh rakhe hain humne he warna pichle 4 saal se usase better Student leader naa koi hua hai naa koi hoga...ye kal kaa ladka usko dikkat dega aji ghanta Papa Haryana Government mein Educational Minister hain uske uppar se Humaare family friend uska bass chale toh abhi firse election karwaake banjaae president ...

Mouni-True..

Main-ye principal kaa kya scene hai...mera admission accept karega yaa nahi ...

Anshul-Normally nahi kartey woh accept unke liye rules bahot important hain...but aapka toh influence hai kaafi hojaaega aaram se...

Main- badhiya...

Anshul-Woh saamne hai AP bhai Office...

Main-thanks dudes for helping me...

Anshul-no problem bhai anytime ..

Ye sunke main office k saamne aaya bahaar ek peon kaka khaddey they..

Main-kaka Andar jaana hai sir kab free honge...

Kaka-Jaao beta abhi free he hain...

Main-thanks..

Ye bolke maine gate knock kiya or Andar se ek bhaari bharkam awaaj aai...""Come In""..

Jisse sunke main Andar enter hua toh Andar Ek 50-55 age kaa thoda budhau type aadmi baitha tha well dressed well behaved or uske aage name plate par likha tha "Aalok Rawat Principal"... Usne meri taraf koi dhyaan nahi diya as woh niche table par kuch padh raha tha ....

Main-Good Morning Sir...

Ispar usne bina meri taraf dekhe kahaa..

Aalok-Morning Please sit down...

Main-thanks sir...

Aalok-Now tell me your Doubt...

Main-doubt...?

Aalok-yeah doubt tumhe complaint karni haina ...

Main-No off course not sir ...Main toh yahaan admission k liye aaya hun...

Ye sunke usne apni gardan uthaai or ek najar se mujhe dekha kuch seconds k liye or firse gardan niche karli...

Aalok-Admission what admission...

Main-Admission in this college Sir for me...

Aalok- Get out. .

Main-excuse me...

Aalok-Get out...Admission procedure end hue almost 10 months hogaye hain...so you are late...and if next year k liye aae ho toh you are very early...

Main-Sir main issi saal k liye aaya hun I know I am late but meri majboori thi you know myself...

Aalok-Mr. AP I know very well ki aap kon hain...

Main-Are waah thankyou thankyou sir...so Aapko toh maalum he hoga main kahaan tha kiss haal mein tha...isliye late hogaya and I don't want to miss another year I can still catch up on my studies...

Aalok-ha ha ha ....Very funny now get out...koi admission nahi hoga abhi next year aana ...

Iski maa kaa bhosdaa bhen k lawde budhau daai chhod dunga teri...

Nahi be Dhyaan rakh Isase nahi ulajhna calm rehh..

Main-Sir try to understand ...

Aalok-dekho main ek baat ko baar baar nahi repeat karta I made myself perfectly clear so please leave.. Or by the way tumne 12th kab ki jabki tum toh exams k time yahaan they he nahi...

Main-Distance se Sir...

Aalok- are you kidding me foreign country mein board Executive ko bheja tumhaare liye..

Main-Sir ek student ki life kaa sawaal tha bhejna toh tha he or waise bhi uske aane jaane rehne kaa saara intejaam humne he karwaaya government k bus papers k paise lage wahaan...

Aalok-Or no. Kitane mille tumhe...

What the fuck bhenchod no. Toh dekhe he nahi Marksheet mein iski maa kaa fill in the blanks ...

Main-W.w..ww.oh sir 90% approximately...

Aalok-great ...So next year bhi aap eligible honge admission k liye best of luck now leave... Or I will call the security...

Bhosdk peon ko security bolta hai...

Main khadda hua or bahaar ki taraf jaane laga toh woh principal bola...

Aalok-please next year bhi matt apply karna I don't want any Murderer in my college....

Main-abe BH....

Control bhosdk control control... Abhi gaali nikal jaati....

Main bina kuch kahe bahaar aaya Lamba saa sans liya or Khudko shant karne laga ...

Main-Iski maa kaa bhosdaa bhenchod jhant k Baal Teri maa ki chut bhosdk ...saala samjhta kya hai Khudko iski daai chhod dunga BC jhant naa ukhaad paaega mera...

Maine gusse mein he bhai ko call lagaaya.

Deva-hello...

Main- ghantey kaa hello...

Deva-kya hua. ?

Main-ye chutiya principal mera admission accept nahi kar raha hai ...

Deva-tune kuch kahaa toh nahi usse....

Main-abtak toh nahi lekin jyaada karega toh pell dunga sale ko...

Deva-tujhe kuch bhi nahi karna woh pohanch waala aadmi hai...

Main-i know I know toh ab admission kaa kya karun...

Deva-Apne Jo Education minister hain Rohit k papa woh Uske kaafi ache dost hain main unko bhej deta hun woh baat karlenge hojaaega admission bus tu kuch naa boliyo...

Main-ok...

Call disconnected...

Main- ajeeb chutiyaapa hai bhenchod aajkal political log principal ban jaatey hain bhenchod admission nahi karwaana matt karwaa aise chutiyon ki tarah kya lodupaa kar raha hai bc...saala Murderer bolta hai mereko bhenchod ...

Main gaali detey detey ek side aagaya ...or Rohit ko call kiya .

Main-bhen k lawde Bangkok se aaraha hai kya itani derr. .

Rohit-mill liya lagta hai principal se hahaha...

Main-bhosdk hansta kya hai...

Rohit-abe chill canteen mein baith main aaraha hun bus....laxman hoga wahin...

Main-jaldi..

Phone cut karke main canteen ki taraf chal diya Jo pehle waali jagah par he thi thankgod lekin renovation uska bhi hogaya tha...Rohit k according abtak laxman he in charge hai canteen kaa chalo sahi hai ek banda toh kaam kaa hua idhar...Main Andar enter hua toh wahaan bheeed dekh k aankh khull gayi meri...bhenchod full too bheed thi udhar par lawde log subah subah bhi yahaan baithey hain college mein kya gand marwaane aatey hain BC ...Maine idhar udhar laxman ko dekha toh woh wahaan nahi milla ...lekin tabhi koi piche se mera naam pukaara or ye jhant baraabar awaaj mujhe jaani pehchaani lagi...

Main-Beta Ashish ...

Mere just left mein ek table k chaaron taraf Ashish, Ajit,Arushi ,Sana and Divya baithey they ....

Or ye tha in log se mera pehla Meet Up mujhe dekh kar woh log k thobdey par surprise or Khussi k bhaav they Jo achi baat thi kyunki mujhe maalum tha Mere bina Ashish ko bhi koi nahi puchega as lucky ne usko koi chutiya se post de rakhi hogi jiska koi matlab nahi hoga ....

Ashish khadda hua mujhse Galle milla or fir Ek ek kar Sab galle mille Sabse jyaada khuss Arushi Or Ashish they or sabse kam Sana thi jiska reason unknown tha maybe lucky k sath reh kar chutiya hogaya ho dimag lekin fir same baat who cares...

Ashish-Bc kaisa hai be..

Main-mast beta apni suna...

Ashish-Bus kat rahi hai jindagi ...

Main-kategi he beta mere bina tereko puchhega kon...

Ashish-Ye bhi hai BC..

Ajit-Kaisa hai bhai...

Main-Are mast Ajit tu kaisa hai...

Ajit-Same katt rahi hai jindagi...

Main-lol tumhaara bhi wahi haal hai kya....

Ajit-Almost ...

Arushi-Hi...

Main-hi..how are you...

Arushi-Good Very good..

Main-chasma kidhar par gaya tumhaara ...

Arushi-:D ab jarurat nahi padti...

Main-Nice..or Mummy ji kaisi hain...

Arushi-Bahot badhiya ....

Main-Divya ji kaisi ho...

Ispar Divya hanspaddi...

Divya-Badhiya hun Sir or aapke aane k baad or bhi badhiya...:D

Main- shabbas....

Sana-Hey AP..

Main-Hi...

Ashish-Baith naa bhai khadda kya hai...

Main Ashish k bagal waali chair par baitha or baaki sabki tarah inhone bhi wahi bakchod sawaal kiye kahaan tha kyun tha kab tha ...or Maine bhi inko bataa diya ki main kahaan tha jyaada jaankari inko nahi di bus ye bataaya main kahaan tha karke ..

Continued....

Update-16(Admission Suxxefoooool)
​
Ashish-Bhai its so Good To have you back...BC Tere bina Sab kuch suna hogaya tha ...

Main-maanta hai ki nahi BC...

Ashish-bilkul bhai pehle nahi maanta tha but jabse tu gayab hua tabse maananey laga hun...

Main-Mujhe pata he tha BC mere jaane k baad yahi boring life hogi tumhaari...

Main aage kuch bolta usase pehle mera phone Baja Jo haryana k education minister Ramesh Singh kaa tha Ye humaari party k khass hain or Rohit k dad bhi...

Main-Ji uncle...

Ramesh-AP I am in college aaja mill letey hain Principal Sahaab se..

Main-you go talk to him naa I ain't coming... Sab confirm hojaae tab bulaa Lena aap..

Ramesh-Ok Main baat karta hun...

Main-Ok bye....

Call disconnected...

Tabhi wahaan Rohit aagaya ...usse dekh even Ashish wagairaah bhi shocked they as I think woh aajkal kaafi kam college aata hai yaa maybe bahot jyaada kam...

Main-Bc Wakanda se aaya kya...

Main uthke usase Galle milla...

Rohit-bhenchod I missed you so so so much bhai.....

Main-Same yaar ...

Rohit-kaisa hai tu..

Main-fit and fine ...

Maine dekha ki Rohit thoda Emotional horaha tha mujhe dekh ke isliye main usko aaram se bola.

Main-Bc Rona nahi be beijatti hojaaegi..

Rohit-hatt BC...

Main-Gajab..

Rohit-Kaise ho bacha party...

Ashish-bus badhiya kaafi time baad darshan diye ...

Rohit-busy tha bro...

Main- aa baith BC...

Rohit ne ek chair Lee or mere bagal mein baithgaya ...

Main-A Rohit Tere papa aae hain college mein ...

Rohit-kya BC kab kyun kahaan...?

Main-mere admission k liye be chill kar...

Rohit-Bc Tere admission k chakkar mein meri lag jaaegi...

Main-Main hun naa BC tension not...

Rohit-President se milla...

Main-kaaeka president...

Rohit-College president Abhi...

Main- Naa I don't care aise president 36 ghumtey hain ...

Rohit-Ye Sab ussi k supporters hain...

Main-lol,Sahi hai...

Ashish-Or kisko support kartey bhai ek wahi toh tha tu toh khadda nahi hua or kisko kartey support ...

Rohit-Bore hogaya tha BC ...

Main-Sahi kiya..let them enjoy...

Rohit-wahi kar raha main.. apun koi taang nahi adaata unke bich I don't even care ab students complaint leke aatey ki Rohit bhai President and team help nahi kar rahi main bhagaadeta saalon ko ki Vote aisi taisi karwaane ko diya tha BC...

Sana-We don't need any kind of help we can manage ourselves tumlog apna dekho...

Main-oh Teri ki..lol...

Rohit-Sabke parr nikal aae hain BC dekhle..

main- again apne ko ghanta farak nahi padta...Ye bc laxman canteen khulli chhodke kidhar gaya ...

Rohit-uske punter log toh yahin Hain woh bhi yahin kahin hoga ...woh aagaaya le...

Main-bc kahaan gayab rehta haibe chutiye...

Laxman mujhe dekh k kaafi shocked tha woh gate par he rukk gaya almost uski aankhon mein aanshu aagaye they ...(As laxman mera khass tha Kaafi time se usko jaanta hun main or uski kaafi help bhi ki hai Maine Paison se bhi or waise bhi college main tabse aata jaata tha jab main 9th class mein tha Tab Rohit Btech mein tha idhar or main Sam Or Ravi uske sath idhar ladkiyon par line maarne aatey they befaltu fukrapanthi karne tabhi Laxman se jaan pehchaan hui thi pehle iski dukaan college k bahaar thi choti si fir Maine 3 saal pehle Canteen kaa tender bharrne ko kahaa isko paise diye toh isne bharra Rohit tab president tha toh ussne tender approve karwaaya or ye yahaan aagaya...mereko bhai maanta hai ye ...age hogi 25-26 iski Dikhne mein normal middle class banda hai Jo sabko respect deta hai )Back to present...

Main-Aise kya dekh raha original hun be...

Ye sun woh bhag k aake mere Galle milla...

Laxman-bhai jaan he challi gayi thi tumhaare sath ab jaake kaleje ko chain milla ..

Main-Tujhe toh nahi but Teri coffee or chaai ko bahot miss kiya BC wahaan ..

Lax-ek he baat hai bhai ..Bus aapke sath sath college ki bhi ronak challi gayi thi...

As scene thoda loud hogaya toh almost canteen mein baithey hue sab ko ye maalum hogaya ki AP bhai aaela hai or as usual mujhe jealousy ,surprise ,Happiness or anger k mille julle expressions mille lekin again I don't care ...

Mera phone firse Baja iss baar bhi Ramesh uncle he they...

Main-Ji uncle...

Ramesh-aaja office mein hogaya Kaam...

Main-Arrey gajab Thanks uncle...

Ramesh-Rohit aaya hai college ..?

Main-haan.. Woh kyun nahi aaega...

Ramesh-Usko bhi sath leke aana idhar....

Main-Sure Uncle...

Call disconnected....

Main-A Rohit....

Rohit-haan...

Main-chal aaja tujhe bhi office bulaaya hai Uncle ne....

Rohit-phakk BC main bola tha tereko meri marregi...

Main- tension not be main dekh lunga ...

Rohit-Bhai ab toh tu he hai...

Main-Ok bhailog Jaldi miltey hain ....laxu aake coffee peeta ...

Laxman-anytime bhai...

Ye bolke Main Or Rohit Khaddey hue or office ki taraf chal diye ....

Main-Tu bhosdk college kyun nahi aata be...

Rohit-bore hogaya hun yaar idhar BC woh president k chamche chutiyaapa kartey fir mereko gussa aata uppar se Mangal bhai bole hain ki bilkul shant rehna hai toh main keval mere lectures k time aata kabhi kabhaar ...ab tu aagaya hai toh rojj aaunga...

Main-yo ...

Rohit- waise Teri ex tujhe dekh k khuss nahi lagrahi....

Main-kon Sana ...

Rohit-haan...

Main-Bhai Lucky k sath Rehti hai woh Or woh lawda meri shakal se bhi darrta hai toh bharrdiya hoga dimag mein sabkuch toh ye bhi jalllney lagi but apan ko kya Matlab gand marwaae BC....

Rohit-Sahi bola...

Hum dono principal office mein aae toh Ramesh uncle or woh principal bada Hans-2 k baatein kar rahe they acha yaarana lagta hai BC...

Raman-Aao aao AP...

Main-Ji Uncle...

Raman-Aap bhi aaiye Sahaabjaadey...

Rohit-Hi dad...

Raman- Principal sir kehrahe hain aajkal tumhaari complaint nahi aati koi...

Main-Ye toh achi baat haina uncle sudhar gaya hai ye ,padhaai mein dhyaan deta hai ab ...

Raman-Mujhe badi mushqill se vishwash hua but Jo bhi hai achi baat hai ...

Main-(aaram Se) Complaint tab naa aaegi BC jab college aaega ...

Rohit-chup be..

Raman-kuch kaha tumne....

Rohit-nahi dad nothing...

Raman-so Jo bhi hai keval padhaai mein he matt ghuss k reh jaana Other activities bhi jaruri hain...

Main-are tension not uncle ab main sambhall lunga isko....

Rama -Great toh tum pohancho class AP tum aajao idhar...

Uske baad Rohit wahaan se nikal liya or Main aage aaya ...

Raman-please have a seat.....

Aalok-Dekho AP jaisa ki Raman ji bhi jaantey hain main apne rules nahi todta kabhi nahi but tumhaara case alag hai Raman ji ne bataaya tum kin haalaaton se gujre ho already tumhaara kaafi time barbaad hochuka hai study k field mein or main nahi caahta ki tum or piche raho ..Isliye I accept your admission ...

Main- thankyou sir...

Aalok-and yet Maine mere rules k khilaaf jaakar tumhe iss college mein liya hai toh meri najar humessa tumpar rahegi and also sab teachers k liye bhi tumhaari guarantee main loonga toh kuch baatein jinka tumhe khass dhyaan rakhna hai no.1 jaisa tumne kahaa tha ki tum Abhi bhi syllabus cover kar shaktey ho exams se pehle toh bus wahi karna hai abhi next semester exams tumhe clear karne hain taaki teachers khuss rahein tumse no.2 No unnecessary fights tumhe koi befaltu kaa scene create nahi karna hai apne kaam se kaam rakho ...Tumhe ek sensible student banke rehna hai jitani jyaada tumhaari complaints hongi utane he tumhaare chances honge iss college se bahaar nikaale jaane k ...Understood..?

Main-yes sir.......

Lawde kaa yes bhenchod sidha sidha boldey meri gand maarni hai bhen k lawde aise indirectly kya rules samjha raha BC...

Aalok-so apne documents leke first floor par jaao main wahaan phone kardeta hun tumhaara admission hojaaega ...

Main- thankyou sir...

Raman-Ok toh Aalok main bhi nikalta hun thanks for the help...

Aalok-No problem at all ...Its good to meet you as always...

Continued....

Update-18(Nicki Mam)
​
Mujhe office mein 1ghantey se uppar lag gaya uske baad uss jhant baraabar incharge ne meri photo maangi ...

Incharge-Myself Pawan Sir...

Main-Nice too meet you...

Pawan-Yahaan Camera k saamne aaiye sir...I card k liye photo leni hain..

Main-Get up mast nahi hai yaar abhi BC bandar k tattey jaisi shakal hogayi hai... suno main Email karta aapko meri faadu c photo woh lagaadena apne phone kaa camera faadu hai kal he faad photos khinche Maine rukk bhej deta email bolo...

Usne apni email bataai Maine photo bhejdi....

Main-Aise he thodi badi lelena Photo hairstyle aana caahiye ...

Pawan-Sure ...I card lelena sir aap parson.

Main-Thanks..

Finally main wahaan se bahaar aaya or seedha laxman ki taraf nikal gaya mid day tha toh classes mein chale gaye they students isliye hall mein ek do students he dikh rahe they ...tabhi mereko ek class se Sam or Ravi nikaltey dikhe main unke piche bhaaga or Sam ko punch diya piche se....

Main-bhosdko classein wlassein lagaai jaarahi hain badi padhaai horahi hai...padhke collector banoge pareevar kaa naam uncha karoge apne bhai kaa naam roshan karoge ...

Sam-Darra diya bhosdk abhi gand fatt jaati meri aise nahi kartey...or rahi baat class ki beta tu bhi karle thoda enjoy Aage aage jab class suru karega naa tab pata chalega...

Ravi-yahaan se harr khabbar bhabhi ko jaaegi or agar class miss hui toh ghar par babhi nahi school waali Deepika Madam millegi ....

Main-dekh bhosdk abhi Sam bola tha aise matt daraaaya karo gand fatt jaati hai saala....

Main aage kuch bolta usase pehle mere pith par koi solid cheej jorr se lagi jisase mujhe kaafi dard hua or main ekdum gusse mein piche mudaa toh piche kaa najaara dekh kar meri or jyaada fatti...kyunki Piche gusse se laal Nicki mam khaddi thi...By God gusse mein toh or bhi mast lagti hai yaar Nicki madam kya figure kya Adaaein kya nakhre aae haaye yaad ho toh Maine bataaya Nicki mam woh pehli aisi Lady thi jiske sapne leta tha main ek time par lekin kuch hua nahi or naa he hoga samjhe...

Main-nicki mam what a pleasant surprise...

Ye suntey he madam ne apne hath mein Lee hui book mere thobdey par dee BC knockout punch k maafik...

Isase achha bhenchod aata he nahi harr jagah dhulaai he horahi hai iski maa ka any body can dance ajeeb bakchodi hai...

Main-Ohh! That hurts ...

Maine dhyaan diya toh Nicki madam k sath ek group tha students kaa I guess Sam or baaki unhi ki class se nikale they Jisme Sana ,Arushi ,Divya or woh nayi maal Ladki Mouni bhi thi...wohlog madam se doubt clear kar rahe they jab madam kaa dhyaan mujh par pada ..

Nicki madam ne aage badhke mera kaan pakad liya jor se jisase mujhe School waali Nicki madam yaad aagayi ...This shit is so fucked up bro..

Main-oouchh! Shit madam sorry...

Nicki-Shut up....

Main-Kasam se kaan tootgaya toh poora face bhadda lagega ...please reham karo ....

Nicki- How dare you come in front of me without your sorry Gift...

Main- actually mujhe pata nahi tha aap yahin milloge Babhi ne bataaya aap out of city ho ...

Nicki-tere aane ki news sunke 2 din pehle waapis aagayi abhi class k baad seedha haweli aarahi thi ki tu yahin millgaya..

Main-meko maalum hota toh gift leke aata befaltu maar paddi..main toh idhar admission k liye aaya tha ...

Nicki-wait a minute tum yahaan admission loge...

Main-loge nahi le chuka ...aap sabko chhodke kidhar jaaunga...

Nicki-OMG ...this calls for a celebration AP ...

Main-(Aaram Se) 9:00 pm haweli par aaj dinner Babhi k hath kaa ...

Nicki-Deepu k hath k khaane k liye I am always down and you know that ...I missed you so so so much yaar abhi school hota toh hug karleti tumhe ...

Main-Chalein kopche mein fir...?

Nicki-(hanske) shut up...so finally college is about to get entertaining... I was bored yaar...

Main-not yet naye log aaein hain unko karne do try unse nahi hua toh hum karenge ...

Nicki - almost 1 Saal hogaya hai unko aae abtak kuch naa hua unse uppar se saddu saa atmosphere hogaya hai college kaa ...

Main-Koi naa main hun naa...

Sam-befaltu k dialogues naa maara kar BC...

Nicki-Language Sam....

Sam- isko bolo naa Nicki mam bina bataae gayab hogaya tha ye naa koi khojj khabbar or uppar se aapka gift bhi bhoolgaya ab toh dho he daalo..

MAin-Ho toh gaya be or kya hath pair tudwaaega mere ...

Nicki-aaj raatko 9:00 pm wahin millna tum teeno abhi yahaan scene create horaha inke doubts clear karne hain..

Main-NO problems... Buhbye ...

Sam-See you tonight mam...

Uske baad Hum teeno canteen ki taraf nikal paddey....

Main-Abe Ritu naa dikhi...

Sam-No idea I guess parson dekha tha main usko ..jyaada dhyaan naa diya...

Main-Rohit se puchta hun ...

Sam-Suna nahi be uska ek bf hai ab chutiye.....

Main-toh bhai millun bhi nahi matlab ajeeb lawdu hai be...dekh be Ravi kya gandu harkat karta hai ye..

Ravi-Gand tod de saale ki..Jaldi-2 chalo be Cigarette peeni hai mereko ....

Hum canteen mein aaye wahaan Laxman k under uske 2 Loundey bhi kaam kartey hain laxman kaa Andar ek chota saa cabin hai jahaan humko cigarette allowed hai lekin secretly, kissi ko pata chala toh canteen bandh turant...isliye hum Andar gaye wahaan bus itana space hai ki ek khidki ,ek Laxman ki chair or ek toota hua bed Hai ...Wahaan 5-6 bandey aa shaktey max...Andar aatey he humne gate bandh kiya laxman apna hissab kitaab dekh raha tha humlog uss bed par baithey ...

Main-bhosdk ye bed toh badlwaa le...kabhi koi item yahaan k yahaan ready hogayi toh BC kon flat takk jaae bed achha ho toh yahin nipat jaae...yaa BC kabhi nind he aarahi ho toh so he jaaein...

Lax- ye toota hua hai tabhi allowed hai AP bhai warna ye Sab allowed nahi hai college canteen mein,nahi toh main kabkaa badalwaa leta...

Main-Bc shyaana hai tu toh...chal jaldi hissab kar fir 3 special coffee Lee aa...

Lax-hissab baad mein hota rahega pehle le he aata...

Main-bc bhai ho toh Tere jaisa...

Tabhi mera phone Baja Jo Rohit kaa tha...

Rohit-Ghar gaya kya be..?

Main-Naa idhar hai Gufaa mein...

Rohit-aaraha BC...

Main-ok...

Call disconnected ...

Main-Lax 4 special kardena ...

Update-20(Investigating)

​
Humlog canteen gaye to wahaan par kaafi students ikatha huele they koi chaai coffee naa milrahi thi bus Sab ek side mein khaddey they line se unko Rajat dekhraha tha..in short aage jaane se rokk raha tha..

Rajat-aage naa aao be ...

Main-kamaal kartey ho pandey ji...

Rajat-Are AP Bhai Sam Bhai Ravi boss..Kaise ho ...

Main-hum bindash apni sunao...

Rajat-ekdum jhakkas...aao aao aage aajao ...Anjali madam aage he Hain...

Humlog aage aae toh counter k pass Anjali Ami or Jiya Laxman se puchtaach Kar rahe they shayad unhone laxman ko as a suspect leliya tha....or woh bechaara darra sehma jawaab deraha tha..

Uske alaawa wahaan Lucky ,Sana ,Ashish ,Ajit Arushi or Divya Bhi they...main unke side se nikla toh lucky ne Meri taraf lawde jaisa munh banaake dekha maine usko smile di ye tha Mera or lucky kaa first face off mujhe dekh k totally jall Gaya tha bhenchod woh..bc kab nada hoga maadarjaat ....

Hum 4on aage aae Anjali or Ami ka back tha humaari side toh main aaram se unke bich mein jaake ekdum se bola...

Main-Whatsupp...?

Ekdum se ye sun woh Dono he darr gayi...

Ami-Holy Fuck you scared the shit out of me...

Anjali-Seriously yaar kaleja hilgaya...

Main- exactly that was the plan ...

Jiya-Wassup babe....

Main-mast daahling ..kaisi hai...

Jiya-mast...

Anjali-matter pata chala...?

Main-haan thoda bahot...tumlog kya Kar rele...

Anjali-bus investigation...

Main-isko chhodo ye mere sath hai...

Anjali- kon...ye? Isne body discover ki hai....

Main-haao I know Bata toh raha hun he is with me ...

Anjali-ok no problem...

Laxman- AP bhai bachi kuchi jaan nikal jaati aap naa aatey toh ...

Main-dhamkaaya kya be tereko...?bataadena haan Abhi badla leletey...

Anjali-kya lagta hai...

Main-no idea...mujhe maalum he nahi kuch...

Anjali-kuch suggest toh kar...

Main-First of all ye sab chutiye log ko bahaar nikaalo aise thodi naa kaam hota hai chappar chappar mein...Rajat Bhai bhejdo sabko...

Rajat-chalo re bacha log show khatam hua aajkaa bahaar chalo jaldi ...koi nahi rukkega idhar...

Main-teachers nahi Hain koi idhar...?

Anjali-nahi Principal Legaye sabko yahaan se meeting k liye ...ki students k liye kaise handle karein ye situation...

Main- chutiya...

Jiya-quick quick everyone i want this place clear...

Sab students udhar se nikal liye bus lucky or uski gang rehgayi...

Rajat-Tumhe kya alag se likhwaake dun...chalo bahaar ..

Lucky-excuse me sir I am the vice president of this college since president is not available I am the student's representative ...isliye humein poora hakk hai jaananey kaa ki yahaan kya horaha hai...mujhe baaki students ko jawaab Dena hai...

Rajat - student president...?aisi Bhi koi cheej hoti hai kya...?

Anjali-dekho aage jo crime scene hai woh tum sable liye disturbing ho shakta hai so I suggest tumlog yahin rukko ..I will get you updated...

Lucky-Sorry mam but we are ok with anything you show us....we are not going anywhere...agar bhejna he hai toh isko bhejo ...I mean why the hell is he with us here...?1.5 saal takk kaayron ki tarah chupta raha or ab waapis aake ye sochraha hai ki yahi boss hai...lekin guess what pehle Bhi kaayar tha or Abhi Bhi hai kuch nahi badla...

Ami-kya kaha tumne...

Main-kuch nahi...

Ami-itani hindi samjh aati hai mujhe ...how the hell...?

Main-shut up...mere pass itana time nahi hai waste Karne ko.....tu pehle Bhi chutiya tha or abhi pehle se Bhi jyaada, apne kaam se kaam rakh warna aisa President banaanunga ki roega college k naam se...do not dare to cross my path...

Anjali-lets go crime scene kaa jaayjaa leletey...

Main-i am not coming...woh bathroom maalum kitana saddu hai...itani bhayaanak badbu aati usme se...

Anjali-fikar not mask hai mere pass extra...

Main- Fuck....

Humlog bathroom ki taraf gaye Anjali k pass ek he mask extra tha Jo maine leliya ... Lucky Ashish or Ajit andar aagaye lekin Sana ,Arushi or Divya bahaar be rukki kyunki unki gand fatt gayi...Sam Ravi or Rohit Bhi gate k pass he rukke as badbu kaafi thi ...

andar Main ,Anjali Ami or Jiya he they ...
Scene ye tha ki Ek 35-37 age kaa guard wahaan padda tha uske maathe(forehead) par chot kaa nishaan saaf dikhraha tha Jo kaafi ghera tha or usme se kaafi khoon nikla tha Jo farsh par tha..blood sookh gaya tha as laash Kal raat ki hai...

Main-Ami Enlighten me...

Ami-you sure...mere pass theory hai...iss Murder ko prove karne ki...

Main- I know you are fast but I also know ki tu close Bhi nahi hai solve karne k...

Ami-lagi shart ...

Main-lag gayi...agar Teri theory Jo sach toh ho he nahi shakti but agar usne sense Bhi banaai toh teri ek wish Puri hogi...

Ami-woh wish ye hai ki tum mujhe ye Puri city or college kaa toor doge...

Main-done...

Anjali-I am excited two of the fastest brains contesting....

Main-dont compare her to me ...see ye tumlog se bahot smart hai but the thing is ye Mera 1% he hai...toh tum log Mera 0.33 % he ho...

Anjali-chup Kar be show off...

Main-sach kadwa hota hai ...Ami start ...

Ami-see gate open tha bathroom kaa raat ko ye toilet karne aaya yahaan khadda hoke ye toilet Kar raha tha iska back tha gate ki side tab koi iska piche se andar enter hua koi hatta katta aadmi at least 6"2 -6"4 heigth...usne piche se iska head directly iss toilet seat par de maara full force se ...dekho ghaav iske forehead par hai toh ek he condition mein Asia ghaav ban shakta hai or woh hai tab jab attack piche se hua ho...also iske kapde dekho touched Hain maano killer kuch dhund raha ho shayad ussi ki wajah se iska murder hua hai ...so hence proved...

Ami ki thoery sun sab chakra Gaye as theory kaafi sahi this or tagdi Bhi ek ek detail mein ghussi thi woh...

Anjali- what the hell ... brilliant Ami...

Ravi-AP version 2.0 is here...

Lucky-6"2-6"4 kaa kon hoga yahaan raat ko...

Main- nice theory make sense little bit...

Ravi-little bit kya be or kya lega yahi sach hai...

Main-nope sach k toh aas pass he nahi hai...

Anjali - what do you mean...

Main-see Harr cheej ko dekhne k 3 angles hotey Hain ek simple jiska Matlab hota hai samjh mein kuch nahi aaya but khudse he imagine karliya sab Jo normal log use kartey Hain....second hota hai thoda tuff angle jisme Jo dikhraha hota hai yaa saamne waala Jo dikhaana caahraha hai ussi ki theory banaai Jo 99% sach jaisi lagegi ye angle Jo Ami ne use Kiya.. ...third angle hota hai hardest Truth ki exactly kya hua ..ye main use karta hun...you know the hardest,bitterest and trickiest thing in the entire world is TRUTH...

Sam-gyaan naa de be Bata exactly hua kya idhar...

Main-done first of all ye bataao death ka reason kya hai...

Anjali- off course injury...

Main-nope blood lost...and secondly ye murder hai he nahi...

Sab-what the fuck...?

Mere munh as ye sunke woh sab blank hogaye...

Anjali-kehna kya caahraha hai ...?

Main- Exactly Jo tumlog ne suna...

Sam-pagal wagal hoagaya hai kya be...

Lucky-ye sathiyaa Gaya hai aise suicide kon karta hai Be...isko woh drugs do tab he kuch kaam karega iska dimag...

Main-kon bola ye suicide hai...?

Sam-what the fuck... suicide Bhi nahi hai murder Bhi nahi hai toh ye hai kya...?

Main-unexpected death ...

Sab-kya...?

Ye sun ek baar firse sab blank hogaye unke uppar se Gaya sab..bc kin chuttad log k bich fans Gaya bc kitane slow Hain ye log...

Main-abe thoda toh dimag lagaaya Karo mera munh kya dekh rahe ho...ok wait let me prove...

Update-21(Genius)

​

Main-ok let me prove...

Anjali-haan please samjhaa hum normal log ko ...

Main-Dekho iske thobdey ko uspe saaf dikhraha hai ye honsh mein nahi tha nashe mein tha ....

Anjali-lekin alcohol k koi traces nahi mille isko body par ...

Main-Itani jaldi naa Kiya Karo...daru bola Maine ...

Anjali-toh..?

Main-Woh drugs leraha tha woh Bhi kaafi quantity mein...ye dekho iski aankhein pupils sikuud Kar chotey hogaye Hain even aankhein Bhi peeli padne lagi Hain..or iska sareer dekho kuch months pehle ye hatta katta hua karta hoga body se saaf dikhraha hai...drugs isko khaagaye...or main point ye wrapper jo mujhe dustbin mein Milla...iske dwaara isne drugs liye..toh story ye thi ki isne yahaan drugs liye or fir nashe mein khogaya toilet seat k pass aake Peshaab karna suru Kiya full enjoyment mein seat par nahi Pura floor par Peshaab Kiya naachtey hue jhumtey hue...Peshaab khatam Kiya isne tabhi iska pair yahaan fisla ussi k peshaab mein or iska forehead iss toilet seat k sharp side par laga woh dekho Jo khoon laga hua hai ...injury serious thi par itani nahi ki lagtey he ye Marr jaae par girtey he drugs ne apna ashar dikhaaya or dard or nashe k kaaran ye uth nahi paaya ye rainghta hua madad k liye chilaaya par koi aas pass tha he nahi ..ussi ranghney k kaaran iske kapdey aise lagrahe Hain maano koi kuch dhund raha tha yet kuch he minutes mein kaafi blood lost hojaane k kaaran ye marrgaya...hence proved accidentall death...drugs and blood lost killed him...

Maine baat khatam Kar sabki taraf dekha toh woh bus munh faade Meri taraf he dekh rahe they...

Main-What the hell kahaan fans Gaya yaar main...

Anjali-What the shit...Sachi..?

Main- off course ..forensics jab postmortem karenge tab prove hojaaega...

Jiya-brilliant...

Sam-bhenchod ye toh pehle se Bhi tejj hoagaya...

Ravi-kaafi tejj woh Bhi...

Lucky kaa munh aisa hogaya tha maano kissi ne munh mein dediya ho uske ..Uska munh dekh k he mujhe hansi aagayi...

Anjali-thankgod jyaada investigation nahi karni padegi see that's why we missed you..let's wrap this up guys...Rajat Body ko bhejdo postmortem k liye...uske baad he report banaana...

Rajat-Ok mam..

Ami-So mere trip kaa kya hua..?

Main-kaaeka trip..?

Ami-shut up you promised ki agar Meri theory considerable Hui toh tum mujhe college or city kaa tour doge...

Main- theory toh galat thi ...

Ami-but still sensible toh thi...

Anjali-yep Theory kaafi sahi thi..

Ravi-agreed made sense to us tu naa hota toh wahi sahi maantey humlog...

Ami-see sablog bolrahe abtoh ...

Main-ok ok... College kaa tour dedunga but no city tour itani sahi Bhi nahi thi theory...

Ami-done...let's go...

Thodi derr baad Anjali and team nikal gayi body hatwaa di gayi aaj koi Bhi classes nahi thi so students bakchodi pelrahe they harr jagah...Main Ami Sam or Ravi ghumrahe they or sab k sab ladke humein ghur rahe they... actually humein nahi Ami ko because she was looking red hot ... Tight Black top n jeans mein woh ekdum cute lagrahi thi.. infact woh thi he cute ye toh main Bhi maanta hun.. infact usase jyaada cute Maine aajtak koi nahi dekhi... innocent yet deadly...

Ami-holy Molly this college is huge..so many rooms....

Sam-view is lit...

Ami-why these guys stalking us like this...

Main-Not us only you...

Sam-this is India Ami :laughing: a hot girl like you is always followed with guys...

Ami-thats cool...

Ami-Tumhaari class konsa hai...

Main-Frankly I don't even know ki Meri class konsi hai ...

Sam-woh dekho second floor par woh Left se 4th room...humaari class wahi hai...

Ami-nice...

Humlog ghoom he rahe they ki Nicki mam kaa call aagaya mere phone par...

Main-Ji madam...

Nicki-Hogaya Solve ...

Main-yo...aapko kon bola...

Nicki-Ye Rohit Arushi wagairah Hain mere Pass...

Main-ohh!

Nicki-Ek baar library mein aa toh..

Main-ok...

Call disconnected...

Humlog library pohanchey...

Main-Ami only students and staff allowed here tum yahaan ruko view enjoy Karo hum 5 minutes mein aae...

Ami-No problemo..

Hum teeno andar Gaye toh wahaan Nicki mam I guess class lerahi thi kuch students ki ...Yaa doubt clears Kar Rahi thi aisa he kuch...wahaan Rohit Ritu Simmy Pity wagairah they or first year waale Bhi Sana , Arushi , Divya and all ...Hum Rohit k bagal mein baithgaye...

Rohit-Whatsupp..ghumaalaaya..?

Main-Ghumaaraha Still...

Nicki-kya tha yaar ye...?

Main-nothing Serious...just accidentall death..badluck killed him...

Nicki-ohh!..

Main-Ye Rohit and group with me haan go easy on them...

Nicki-jyaada sifaarish naa Kiya Kar ek Baar tu class suru Kar fir Tera Bhi number lagega...Sam Ravi se Puch...

Ravi-main toh jaanta he nahi madam isko...

Sam-humko alag rakh k ilaaj Karo iska aap...

Main- Mera no. Nahi lagega aap nahi lagaaoge...

Nicki-Yep I can't because you are so cute ,but I know someone who can...Lagaaun Deepu ko phone....

Main-lo ji ab majaak Bhi nahi Kar Shakey aapke sath...

Rohit-lol...

Main aage kuch bolta tabhi ek ladka bhaagta hua aaya Jo Rohit k sath hai I guess Vishal naam hai uska ...

Vishal-AP Bhai woh aapke sath Jo ladki thi woh mushibat mein hai...

Main-ohh my God Ami ...For God's shake...Main aata re...

Ye bol Main Ravi or Sam bahaar ki taraf bhaage...toh wahaan library gate k just saamne Ami khaddi thi or uske saamne teen ladke khaddey they actually 2 he khaddey they ek niche padda tha shayad Ami ne gand fod di thi uski...Or baaki 2 ki Bhi futtaney waali thi...Woh uski taraf aatey usase pehle Maine Piche se jaake Ami k kandhey par hath rakha...

Main-Ami...

Lekin main aage kuch bolta usase pehle Ami seconds k hissab se palti or Ek bhayaanak punch mere pait mein rakhdiya...Ye mere liye unexpected tha isliye counter nahi Kar paaya or punch lagtey he main niche girra ghutano par...or jaise he Ami ne dekha ki Piche main tha woh bhi chownki...

Main- what the fuck Ami....andhi hai kya...

Ami-oh God I am so so so so sorry AP ...

Sam-What the shit this was some Hollywood level shit...

Ravi-bc Bruce Lee aagaya tha yahaan toh reflexes dekhe...

Rohit-That was dope bc ...

Main- Kar kya rahi hai tu...

Ami ne mereko uthaaya...

Ami-ye teeno mujhe Pareshan Kar raha tha...

Main- Ami this is India yahaan almost sab tujhe Pareshan he karenge ...what the fuck this is painful...Kya faayda Anjali k sath rehne kaa thoda bahot toh seekh...

Ami-Sorry ..I am trying naa yaar...

Main-lawde kaa trying....or tum bhosdko aisi gand fodunga ki maadarjaat doobara dikhoge nahi college mein iss bhenchod ko uthaao or Gayab hojaao teeno...

Ladka-h.h..h.umne kuch nahi Kiya...

Main-toh khadda kyun hai jaa naa maadarchod ....

Ye sun unhone uss ladke ko uthaaya or 9-2-11 hogaye library side students kam they Warna bc beijatti ho jaati...bc saara jorr yahin lagaadiya...

Ami-i Am really sorry yaar .

Main- chal ab Ghar chal...Gand Todd di Meri bc ...

Sam-woh Bhi badhiya waaali...

Rohit-Ye toh mereko Bhi sikhaana yaar...

Main-Chup bhosdk...

Continued..

Update-24(Bad Day)

​

Main or Ravi firse khaddey hue or bahaar ki taraf chal diye saari class fir hansi humpar or toh or woh lawda Sam Bhi hansa...

Ravi-iski toh gand fodd Deni hai Maine...

Main- sabki he tod denge bhenchod dekh Kaise hans rahe Hain gand marre...

Ritika-jaldi please...

Main-Haan re jaarahe Hain udd k jaaein Kya ab...

Ritika- excuse me ..?

Ravi-(Aaram se)lawda Mera ...

Main-nothing madam ...

Hum Dono bahaar aagaye ...

Ravi- badi mushqill se baithey they bc ...

Main- college suck I don't believe tumlog itane lambe time se Kaise sehrahe ho ye Sab...

Ravi-humaara itana nahi hota tha Bhai...infact ye madam toh bahot sweet hai ...

Main-Lawde kaa sweet dekha Maine ...

Ravi-Aamtorr par aisa nahi karti...

Main-Jo Bhi ho hai badi mast ...

Ravi-jhakkas dikhti hai...

Main-Kya faayda bc ...

Ravi-Rohit ko call Kar toh ...kahaan marwaa raha hai bc ...

Main-good idea ...

Maine Rohit ko call Kiya ..

Rohti-Ji sir...

Main-kahaan haibe ..?

Rohit- Ghar par thoda kaam tha wahi niptaa raha...

Main-Ghar par he rahiyo bhosdk ...

Rohit-kya hua ...

Main-Kya gand maardi hai iss college ki bc achaa khaasa Hua karta tha bc sablog gandu jaise behave Kar rahe Hain..ground mein bc 8-9 janne cricket khelrahe Hain 2-3 basketball 2-4 waise he jhant khujaa rahe baithke bc 4 team toh cricket ki hua karti thi idhar pehle...

Rohit-lol organise toh naa karwaatey games principal lodu or president Maha lodu ...ground ki haalat dekh bc kkitaney khaddey or pathar wagairah paddey hain kissi ko hath pair naa tudwaaane yahaan khelke ...

Main-bhosdk aaj dimag toh aisa firaa hua hai ki Dono ki he gand fodd dun ....bhenchod Mohabtein movie kaa gurukull banaa Diya college ko ..Kya lawde lawde rules Hain. 10 minutes late naa ho shaktey teacher hai nahi class mein tab Bhi phone naa use Kar shaktey Wagairah wagairah bhenchod ....lawda Mera rules follow karega...

Rohit- bhai Sab badalna padega Sab kaa Sab...

Main-Ye principal sochraha hai Sab iske under hai pehle isko aukaat dikhaana hai ki baap Kon hai opposition mein hai lawde opposition kaa he banke reh... bhenchod seats saalon ko 15% milli Hain nakhre behnchod Rulling party waale Hain inke ...iski ladki ko chod dunga main...

Rohit- bhai sahaab tagdi maal hai ....

Main-fir toh bc ussi ko chod denge...Or fir ye lawda President or uski lawdi team inki maa ko chhodun bhosdko ne maa chodd di college ki...Inka toh level Bhi nahi hai Bhenchod ....

Rohit-Sahi hai bhenchod..

Main-or fir ye lawde Sam ki gand maarni hai...

Rohit-what the fuck Woh kidhar se aaya be...?

Main-Abe lawda abhi humpar Hans raha tha bharri class mein ...

Rohit-gand tod de bhosdk ki...

Main-wahi...chal karta call back...Karle Tera kaam...

Rohit-ok Bhai..

Call disconnected...

Main-bhai simple c baat hai classes Apne buss ki baat nahi befaltu frustration hoti hai or frustrate bc mujhe hona he nahi hai befaltu sir dard hoga...fir gussa aaega aise fir dikkat hojaaegi... Sablog ko semester clear caahiye woh main kardunga bc itana IQ toh hai ki Bina padhe nikaal lun ...

Ravi-Bhosdk fir Bhi attendance toh complete karni padegi naa...Warna rusticate kardenge..

Main-kitani % caahiye hoti attendance...

Ravi- dekhle iss semester ki complete karne k liye tereko at least 90%+ present rehna hai..waise toh 70% he hoti hai but tu gayab tha toh woh Bhi absent lagegi...

Main-koi naa attendance lagaake nikallunga yaa sojaaunga bc who gives a fuck...Babhi ko Bhi boldunga aaj...

Humlog laxman k pass aae...toh canteen mein Woh Anshul (Ruhi kaa Bhai) woh maal Mouni or woh teesra ladka Uska naam Kya tha bhenchod...Sunil Sunil ..wohlog baithey kuch padh rahe they....

Anshul-Wassup AP Bhai ...

Main- Matt Puch Bhai ..Subah se hide and seek khel raha teachers k sath...

Anshul- Matlab...?

Main- teachers bahaar nikaal rahe class se...

Anshul-Puri class ko...?

Main-nahi humse he kuch khaas lagaav tha...

Ravi-lol ahahaaha..

Main-Oye LAX...

Lax-ji Bhai ...

Main-2 ....

LAX- Abhi laaya Bhai...

Ravi-andar chalein ...

Main-Chaltey Hain kuch toh frustration Kam hogi..

Ravi-Aaja...

Main-Abe tumhaari padhaai Puri nahi hoti Kya..kabhi class wagairah nahi lagaatey bahaar padhtey rehtey...

Ravi-Actually I guess I know ye log k notes nahi bane they toh Nicki mam ne inlog ko tabtak class se out kardiya jabtak notes naa complete hojaaein ...apni he class mein Hain ye...Sam ne Bhi Tabhi woh notes banaae they...

Main-lol...

Anshul- yep aapse Bhi buri haalat hai..

Main- Ruhi ko boldey woh likhdegi :laughing: doctor waali handwriting mein kuch Bhi kuch Bhi likhdegi wahi check karwaaliyo..

Anshul-hahaha nice idea ...but woh ultaa mujhe he fod dengi...

Main-toh fir Likho bhai mast main Chala...

Humlog andar cabin mein aaye or cigarette jalaali ...ki tabhi Nicki mam kaa call aagaya...

Main-Ji madam..

Nicki-Tumlog firse bahaar nikal Gaye class se...

Main-Nikal Gaye nahi nikaal diye Gaye ....

Nicki-CLASS mein movies dekhoge toh Yahi hoga...

Main-Teacher late tha toh khaali chalaai thi movie woh madam ekdum se saamne aake khaddi hogayi toh main Kya karun....or waise Bhi ye classes waala system bhooljaao ab...

Nicki-matlab...

Main-main naa lagaane waala Semester clear toh main waise Bhi kardunga Bina class toh befaltu dimag kaa dahi Bhi kyun karwaaya..

Nicki-kon Kiya dahi. ..

Main-actually aap he ne suruwaat ki...

Nicki-maine kuch nahi kiya ye rules Hain Meri class mein Jo Bhi late aata sidha bahaar he jaata...

Main-Aji haan aapke bade rules hogaye ...

Nicki-ab Hain toh hain....

Main-oho ho nakhre..

Nicki-ab nakhre Hain toh Hain...

Main-main toh new tha mujhe toh bulaana tha andar rules samjhaadetey ...

Nicki- nope...

Main-toh main rojj he late aaunga jabtak samjhaaoge nahi bahaar he rakhna ...

Nicki-ye jidd naa laga ab...

Main-infact aaunga he nahi itani Subah uthke even alarm se Bhi pehle uthgaya tha main can you believe this full excited tha class k liye Subah he waat lagaadi aapne...

Nicki-woh isliye ki tu time se aae aage se....

Main-agar samjhaatey tab naa aage se aata on time nahi aaunga abtoh aaungaich nahi ...1st or 2nd class cancel ...

Nicki-ab ye nakhre Tere...

Main-hain toh Hain ab Kya karein...

Nicki-maine sorry nahi bolna caahe kuch Karle ...

Main-mujhe sunana Bhi nahi sorry...aap Apne rules dekho jaake ...

Nicki-Kya ladkiyon ki tarah Kar raha hai yaar...

Main-ab Hain toh Hain Kya karein..

Ye bolke Maine call cut kardiya or Agar Nicki mam ko kissi cheej se nafrat hai toh woh hai Unki call yaa baat bina permission cut karne waalon se...

Ravi-hogaya kalyaan bc bataake toh cut karta ...

Main-hum frustrated Hain toh dusron ko Bhi toh karein...

Ravi- lawde lagwaaega Bhai...

Humne cigarette pee tabtak 2 Baar Nicki mam kaa call aaya Jo Maine nahi uthaaya cigarette peeke humlog bahaar aae wahaan baithey toh Laxman coffee Le aaya ...

Main-Bc Kya movie k chakkar mein lawde lage aaj...

Ravi-din kharaab ho toh Bhai Kya Kar shaktey Hain....

Humlog baithey he they wahaan ki udhar kaafi saare students Ek sath aae at least 15_20 toh honge he Jisme Ritu ,Simmy ,Piyu , Vishal , Raj or Avinash Bhi they (Ye sablog Rohit k sath Hain or last part mein bhi aachuke hain)

Main-ye Kya haibe...

Ravi-Ye Rohit ki class k students Hain saare he aagaye ye toh almost...Oye Raj aajao be idhar wahaan naa seat millegi

.
Woh Sab humaari side aagaye or baithgaye...

Ritu-Hello AP ...

Main-Hi...Kya hua...?tumsablog?

Ritu-Nicki mam yaar achaanak mood kharaab hogaya unka or jiss-2 k notes thodey bahot bhi complete naa they un sabko bahaar nikaal Diya or no entry kardiya jabtak complete naa hon...pata nahi ekdum se gussa hogayi .

Main-ahahaahahahahah...

Ravi-lol gajab ..

Ritu-kya hua...

Main- koi phone aaya hoga uske baad gussa Hui hongi...

Piyu-haan Ek phone Kiya tha unhone but tumhe Kaise pata..?

Main - kyunki unke gusse kaa reason humlog he Hain or phone humein he Kiya tha madam ne...

Ritu-Seriously ...

Main-ahahaahahahahah ..

Ravi-bola tha phone cut Matt karr ..in becharon k l lagwaadiye ...

Main-bola toh tha apun frustrated Hain toh dusron ko Bhi kartey hain...

Ritu-Puri class gaaliyan degi tumhe..

Ravi-munh fodd dunga Ek Ek kaa...

Wohlog kuch boltey usase pehle Anjali kaa call aagaya..

Main-Ji Madam...

Anjali-Wassup...?

Main-all good you tell.?

Anjali-listen aaj 4:30 pm par Station aajaana ...

Main-Kya hua..?

Anjali- commissioner sir ne bulaaya hai sabko..red John k liye..

Main-Uska Kya...

Anjali-I don't know yaar koi plan wagairah hoga...

Main-humaari team k alaawa koi naa ho wahaan...

Anjali- unhone keval humein he bulaaya hai...

Main-shabas pohanchjaaenge...

Call disconnected...

Commissioner k baare mein jarra bataadun Jo last part mein Apne khass SP they yogesh uncle unka Promotion ho Chuka hai or ab woh Commissioner of police Hain...

Continued....

Update-25(Ritu)

​
Ritu mujhe thoda awkward lag rahi thi woh caahe kitana he normal behave Kare uppar se but inside woh kaafi Pareshan thi shayad woh confused thi ki Kya main apni relationship ko continue karunga yaa nahi yaa maybe woh continue naa karna caahti ho...isiliye Main canteen mein se uske sath bahaar nikla Ravi Bhi Sath mein tha lekin woh situation ko samjhtey hue wahaan se gayab hogaya ....or hum dono parking mein aagaye..

Main-So finally we officially alone met...

Ritu- yep I was waiting for this...

Main-mujhe boldeti main mill leta..call kardeti...

Ritu-mujhe laga tum busy hoge itane time baad aae ho bahot kaam hoga so thoda wait karliya ...

Main-good see tumhe toh maalum he hai ki main ghumaa firaake baat nahi karta ...

Ritu-yeah I know...

Main-So baat ye hai ki main loggon k cehre padhleta Hun or tumhe dekh k saaf lag raha hai ki tum tensed ho depressed ho..and that is not good...

Ritu-no no I am fine....

Main-Sssshhh..! Mere saamne Juth nahi bolpaaogi...and mujhe reason Bhi pata hai insabka and the reason is me ...You are confused about me you are depressed about me ...and I don't like it ...I know tum kuch kahogi nahi because you are so sweet but Yahi sach hai ...lekin Ek baat main saaf bataadun Ritu you are free to do whatever you want to do Maine pehle Bhi kahaa tha main tumhaara bf nahi Hun Jo tumhe force karunga kissi cheej k liye it's your life it's your choice so jaise caaho waise life spend Karo apni and forgot me bus as a friend yaad rakho wahi kaafi hai tum caahe jiske sath ghumo mujhe koi problem nahi hai kissi ko Bhi boyfriend banaao mujhe problem nahi hai ...You know Ritu tumhe mere baare mein Sab pata he hoga my personality is like a playboy main Ek ladki k sath nahi reh shakta jyaada time ye Maine pehle Bhi kahaa tha main aajtak kaafi ladkiyon k sath Raha lekin Jo attachment Mera tumhaare sath tha woh kissi k sath nahi hua or I guess hoga Bhi nahi but frankly speaking tum Bhi mere sath nahi rehpaaogi and you know it and I know tumhaara bf hai ab and I love that I am so happy for you I hope you stay happy always ...Meri taraf se tumhe tension lene ki koi jarurat nahi hai kyunki agar tension logi toh bimaar hogi Jo bahot bura hai...

Main chup hua or Ritu ki taraf dekha toh uski aankhon mein ye bade+2 aanshu they bc ...

Main-are Kya hua wtf...

Lekin main kuch bolta usase pehle usne mujhe kass k hug karliya...

Ritu- I always respected you AP but aaj Meri najron mein tum or Bhi unche hogaye ....See 2 things 1st Mera koi bf nahi hai I mean haan I have some boys as friends but no i don't have any boyfriend ...

Main-opps that was a mistake...

Ritu-secondly you are the only guy I met who is so open truthfull about himself and I love this about you...I know tum ye pyaar wyaar mein believe nahi kartey but I hope ki agar Mera boyfriend ho toh tumjaisa ho...

Main-chance he naa hai I am one and only ..

Ritu- so I pray to God ki in future tum he mere boyfriend ho...

Main-nope I am over this boyfriend girlfriend shit I hate itek Baar try Kiya abtak lawde lagele hain main playboy he theek Hun...But ek second agar tumhaara koi bf nahi hai toh tum mujhse confused kyun ho...

Ritu- 1.5 year is a long time AP mujhe laga tha ki maybe tum badal Gaye hoge I thought that drug made you something else ...mujhe nahi maalum tha tum humaari relationship ko Kaise handle karoge isiliye darri Hui thi...but AP tum nahi badle you can't change you are the same AP I loved once ...

Main-apun nahi badal shakta never...chal aankhein ponch Le koi aajaega befaltu mein...

Ritu ne apni aankhein ponchi or normal Hui...

Main-So live freely now Jo karna Karo koi tension Matt lo i will be always there for you ...

Ritu- I know ...You are the best friend I have ever had...

Main-Chal pakka Matt nikal ab Naya bf Bhi dhundana hai tujhe...

Ritu-very funny ...what about you tumhe Bhi toh koi nayi ladki dhundani hogi aajkal flirt wagairah nahi kartey tum ...Kya hua AP the great slow hogaya Kya...?

Main-lol never I am faster then ever bus thoda settle hojaaun fir shikaar dhundunga Yun chutkiyon mein pataalunga ... my flirt game is on point...Bus abhi bahot bakchodi horahi hai thoda normal hojaaun fir Start karunga...

Ritu-very good...ladki dhundun...

?

Main- I dont depend on anyone...Main apna shikaar khud dhundata Hun...

Ritu-lets see..

Finally Ritu kaa matter Bhi short out hogaya ab woh Bhi normal thi Warna bechaari depression mein challi jaati uske baad Main or Ravi Ghar aagaye...ghar par hall mein Babhi Or Meenu baithi baatein Kar rahi thi...

Babhi-aaiye aaiye sir...

Main-Sidha bataadeta hun Meri koi galati nahi thi ...

Babhi-oho ho!

Main-Nicki mam ki galati hai unko sunaao aap...

Babhi- Cool... Nicki kaa call aaya tha mujhe usne kahaa ki tumhaari galati hai tumhe sunaaun ...you know Maine Kya kahaa ..?

Main-nope...

Babhi-wahi puraana dialogue tum dono k matters tum dono suljhaao main bich mein nahi aaungi aisa he school mein hota tha aisa he ab hoga...

Main-Main nipatlunga...

Babhi- + mujhe semester clear caahiye I don't care tu Kya karta hai Kya nahi mujhe bus 2 cheejon se Matlab hai first college se rusticate naa hona no. 2 semester clear karna ...

Main-dono he karlunga main don't worry...

Babhi-good for you Warna main Tera munh fod dungi...

Main-great...

Meenu- khaana lagwaadun ...

Main-yep Jaldi fir humein Anji k pass jaana hai...Jaanwar kidhar hai...

Babhi- party office Gaye Hain dono...

Main-A Ravi phone Kar toh unko bol sidha Station he aajaein..

Ravi-karta ...

Humlog ne khaana khaaya or kapdey change kiye and fir RR Leke Station k liye nikal paddey ...Car park karke humlog andar aae ye Haryana kaa biggest and most busiest police station hai iske under at least 550 villages 45 police stations or small chownkies toh pata nahi kitani aati Hain andar hall mein constables , attenders , FIR department ,Receivers etc waalon k cabins they kaafi Saare uske alaawa 7 cells thi Jisme temporarily Criminals ko rakhttey Hain fir first floor par 4 bade rooms Hain Jisme 8 sub inspectors baithtey Hain Uske alaawa Ek bada saa room hai tech related stuff k liye jahaan Pooja kaa cabin hai fir ek record room hai jahaan puraane records files wagairah rehtj Hain....uske alaawa Ek office Senior PI (Police Inspector) kaa hai I mean Jiya kaa or Fir Area chief kaa Office hai yaani Anjali kaa ...uske alawa staff room , equipment room ,Weapon room ,store room, waiting room etcetera Hain ...kull milaake ekdum faadu police station hai...

Humlog sidha first floor par aae Wahaan Sidhiyon k saamne he Jiya kaa office hai jisme kaanch kaa gate lagaa hai Andar Jiya k sath 4-5 log mojuud they ..

Ravi-Abe ye Ashish Ajit lucky wagairah yahaan kya kar rahe Hain...?

Actually Andar Jiya k sath Ashish ,Ajit ,Lucky ,Sana or Divya they...

Main-aae honge college kaa koi stuff Leke ...

Continued...

Update-28 (I Am What I Am)

​
Lekin Meri Sahi chalti Hui life tab dagmaga gayi jab Maine Canteen mein kadam rakha or Meri najar sidhe ek table par gayi or wahi k wahin rukk gayi or Mera Mann khudse he bol padda...

Zindgi Ka Har Zakham Uski Mehrbani Hai;
Meri Zindgi To Ek Adhuri Kahani Hai;
Mita Deta Har Dard Ko Magar;
Ye Dard Hi To Uski Aakhri Nishani Hai!

Mere just Saamne Riya baithi thi usne mujhe dekha Maine usse or humaari aankhein ek dusre se milli orr kuch derr k liye wahin k wahin rukk gayi Maine uski aankhon mein dekha she was alone , stressed ,Happy ,still bright and Non Caring and you know mujhe ye Sab Kaise pata hai because I know her that well...Uski aankhon mein almost mujhe dekh k aanshu aagaye they lekin humaari najrein nahi hatti or tab mere aankhon k aage ekdum se humaari Puri relationship flashback mein chalne lagi fast forward mode mein...

There was A time I loved her..

Or jaise he flashback khatam hua Maine apni aankhon ko wahaan se hattney kaa hukkam Diya aisa he Riya ne Kiya maybe woh Bhi past ki journey Kar aai thi uske baad woh ektak niche table par dekhne lagi...tight yellow Salwaar suit mein woh pehle se bhi jyaada cute lag rahi thi I admit that but dikkat ye thi ki mujhe ab ghanta farak nahi padta tha...

Sam-Beijjati naa karwaa chup chaap seedha guffa mein chal...

Main-Lawda Mera I dont care Aaram se chall...

Humlog guffa mein aagaye andar ..main caahe kuch Bhi kehlun but mere dil k kissi Kone mein Riya abhi bhi shaamil thi but dikkat ye thi ki mujhe uss Kone se ab koi waasta nahi tha bc firse romance waali line nahi pakadni hai Kon itani mehnat Kare Kon iss dil ko manaae woh Sab firse karne k liye naa Ji naa hum adultery waale Hain yahin rehneydo...

Main-Jokes apart Riya pehle se Bhi jyaada hot hogayi hai...

Sam-Hahahahha bhag be lawde...

Ravi- Aashiq jaaga Kya be..?

Main-Aji lawda Mera ...itana chutiya samjhaa hai Kya ek baar chhod Diya Jo chhod Diya doobara uss taraf nahi jaata main..bhosdko tumhe toh maalum he hai...main toh generally bataa Raha Hun ki woh kaafi hot hogayi hai...

Laxman- Yahi hai Kya woh Bhai...?

Ravi-Haan yellow waali...

Laxman- Chalo mulaakat hogayi aapki ...

Main-Hogayi...Bc mujhe 85% ladkiyon k naam yaad nahi rehtey jinke sath main soya Hun but iska toh mujhe nail polish Bhi yaad rehta hai...

Ravi -hahahah matlab you still have feelings for her...?

Main-Offcourse natural Hai Bhai itani pataaka ladki k liye feeling toh hongi he but don't worry we are not getting back together...woh feelings naa Hain...

Ravi-Good for you Warna fir lawde lagenge...

Humlog ne cigarette or coffee pee bahaar aae tabtak Riya jaachuki thi or Bahaar aatey he mera phone Baja Jo Jiya kaa tha...

Main-Wassup J....?

Jiya-All good kahaan ho...?

Main-college ...

Jiya- class mein yaa free ho.,.?

Main-Free...Kya hua...?

Jiya- Main yahaan bahaar aai Hun woh shops k waastey idhar time lagega tumlog aajaaao idhar bore hori main...

Main-Aata Hun...

Humlog bahaar gaye to wahaan Jiya k alaawa 4-5 hawaldaar Bhi they...or Lucky and gang Bhi ...uske alaawa kaafi students or Bhi they Jo lucky k supporters they yaa president k supporters...I don't know...

Main- Wassup...

Jiya-All good Work going fine...

College k gate k saamne 3-4 dukaan Hain Uske alaawa 1 cafe , Restaurant or juice parlor wagairah Hain unmein se kuch par Tambaakhu related products sell kartey Hain wahi bandh karwaane aai Thi Jiya...

Main-Ajay nahi aaya...?

Jiya-Wohlog Kissi Ko arrest karne gaye Hain toh main free thi isliye aagayi..

Ashish-abe tumlog ko aaj Bhi bahaar nikaala madam ne...

Main-Nikaala nahi khud nikale hum bhosdk dekha nahi...Kya chutiya dimag Leke paida hua tha bc tu...

Ashish- Kya Lady Policie k aage gaaliyan dera hai sharam naa aati..

Jiya-I don't mind humaara chalta rehta hai AP continue Karo...

Main-ab bol bc or khaaega ..

Ashish-Nope Pait bharr gaya...

Ashish- Aajkal kiska game bajaane ki planning Kar Raha hai..

Main-Kissi kaa Bhi nahi lode Hitman samjha hai Kya mujhe ...haan agar koi villain aaya toh Uska jarur bajaa dunga ....

Jiya-Ye Sab teko killer samjh baithey ...

Main-Chutiya log yaar ..

Aise he time pass mein aajka din nikala or aise he next 2 din orrr nikal Gaye hum jaan bujh kar Nicki mam ki class mein late hotey or woh humein bahaar nikaal deti full gusse mein...main enjoy Kar raha tha ye Sab bc kyunki ek baar bakchodi suru Hui toh ye sab naa millne waala ...or abtak John bhi koi bakchodi Nahi Kar Raha tha bc mujhe toh ye samjh naa aaraha tha ki woh Aisa Kar Kya Raha hai...

Next day Bhi Subah humaara Yahi plan tha ki Class mein late jaaenge college hum time se pehle he aagaye they canteen ki taraf jaa he rahe they ki ek peon mere pass aaya ...

Peon-AP beta Principal Sir ne bulaaya hai tumhe abhi...

Main-Abhi...?Aisa Kya hua...?

Peon-woh nahi maalum beta ..

Main-Ok let's go...

Main Sidha Principal k cabin mein gaya wahaan woh akela baitha koi documents read Kar Raha tha ...

Prin- AP please have a seat,..

Main-Thanks Sir...

Prin-So coming to the point I guess 5-6 din hogaye tumhe college aatey hue right..?

Main-Yess sir...

Prin-Oe classes kitani lagaai iss bich tumne...?

Main-.w.w.woh Sir...

Princ-Letme tell you 0....I told you AP tumpar najar rakhunga main...

Main-woh toh sir...

Princ-No no no main koi high school teacher nahi Hun AP Jo tum bahaane banaaoge ...tum rojj college aatey ho yahaan ghumtey ho 70% time Canteen mein spend kartey ho baaki 30% ghumtey hue waste kartey ho jab Mann karta hai bahaar challe jaatey ho even tumne I-card nahi liya abtak ...Maine kahaa tha tumhe insabka khass dhyaan rakhna hai as a sincere student rehna hai toh raho Warna I will rusticate you from the college...

Main-Wait a minute don't turn this around on me no.1 Maine abtak college mein kuch bhi nahi Kiya hai so I am still a sincere student ...rahi baat I card ki toh mujhe abtak inform nahi Kiya Gaya hai ki Woh bana yaa nahi bana..

Princ-Woh khud jaake pata karna padta hai...

Main- I paid 2 million rupees as fees for this college woh Maine I-card k liye chakkar kaatne ko nahi diye Hain...

Princ-Padhne k liye Diya Hain I know but padh bhi toh nahi rahe tum class mein tab jaatey ho jab already half class khatam hochuuki hoti hai then tumhe entry nahi milti uske baad tum class ki taraf dekhtey bhi nahi tumhaare friends bahaar see aakar k yahaan ladaai kartey Hain...

Main-Kon friends...

Princ-I don't know you tell me jiss ladki ne ussdin library k saamne ladaai ki thi...even tumhe bhi maara usne ..

Main-She was not with me woh police waalon k sath thi...

Princ-Lekin us time woh tumhaare sath thi...But the point here is classes kyun nahi lagaatey tum...

Main- I don't need classes to pass the exams I can do that on my own...

Princ-Toh fir admission kyun liya Distance education se he karletey college aane ki jarurat he naa hoti...

Main-I love the atmosphere here...

Princ-Stop playing with me AP ...I know tum sochrahe hoge ki main ye isliye Kar Raha Hun ki main opposition k leader kaa dad Hun but no no AP main bachon k sath Rivalry nahi rakhta everyone is equal to me and even I know ki tum mujhe yahaan se nikalwaa shaktey ho but nikalwaaoge nahi kyunki itani aukaat hai nahi tumhaari I run this college now or ye mere rules k hissab se challega I don't want to know Kya reasons Hain but aage se mujhe tum class mein caahiye attendance agar Puri nahi Hui toh main exams se pehle he bahaar faink dunga tumhe ...

Bhen k lawde Teri maa chhod dunga aise Kaise bahaar faink dega ...bhosdk ganje sirr waale lawde jaisi shakal hai Bhenchod mujhe seekhaaega...

Prin-Do I made myself clear...?

Main-yep...

Prin-Then go to the class..

Main-Ok...

Ye bolke main khadda hua...

Princ-Ye gussa Mera kuch nahi bigaad paaega...

Main-LOL iss gusse ne bade badon ko naa chhoda sir don't try to play with me because you will lose...I get that college related cheeejon k liye bolo daant bhi lagaao lekin do not try to get personal kyunki agar main personal hogaya toh fir dikkat hojaaegi...don't think I am changed now I am the same AP I used to be isliye Principal ho Principal banke raho ...don't try to be on my other side because I have done some terrible things there things you can't even imagine so I request you sir do not mess with that side of mine it's bad very very bad...Just listen this about me ..

Bbhosdko official dialogue aaraha hai taaliyaan bajni caahiye Reviews mein...

Main-Just Remember this Sir " I Am The Best At Being The Worst"...

Update-29(Solved)

​
Principal k lawde lagaake or khudke lawde lagwaake main wahaan se fully frustrated bahaar aaya... or bhenchod Meri frustration bahot chutiya hai gand maardeti hai...

Maine bahaar aake Sam ko call Kiya ..

Main-Aajao be class mein...

Sam-Abhi toh suru bhi naa Hui hogi ...abhi Kya karega ...

Main-class lagaani hai...

Sam-kyun what the fuck...

Main-kyunki bhosdk ye Principal ne gand maardi hai Meri ..bc sawaal jawaab ki gand mein ghuss jaata hai Sab phone par he puchle lawde..

Sam- frustrated hai Matlab tagdi gand maari hai aarahe Hain humlog...
Main uppar Gaya I card k liye toh woh ready tha...

card Bina attendance nahi lagti because i-card par ek bar code hai jisko scanner par scan karna padta hai woh scanner class k andar hai just enter hotey he ....Main class k saamne aaya or fir Sam or Ravi ko Puri baat bataai ...

Main-fuck this shit bhenchod college takk toh theek Hai lekin agar abki baar ye Principal personal hua naa toh iski gand maardunga ... bhenchod haaka noodles jaisi shakal hai or nakhre Tom cruise waale....

Humlog bahaar khaddey he they ki Nicki mam wahaan aagayi...

Nicki-Oh..! Finally tumlog ne haar maan he li I knew it ...aagaye naa line par...

Lekin humaare serious thobdey dekh k woh bichmein he rukk gayi...

Nicki-What happened..?

Main befaltu Nicki daahling k uppar frustration nahi nikaalna caahta tha isliye Bina kuch kahe class mein enter Kar Gaya ...I card scan kiya Nicki mam ne piche se awaaj di lekin main anshunaa Kar aage badh Gaya...

Ashish-Lol...aagaye line par bhosdk..

Main-bhen k lawde gand naa fulla munh Todd dunga jhant k Baal.. badi chull rehti hai Teri gand mein ...idhar aa mitta deta Teri chull bhenchod...

Ashish-BC Subah Subah gaaliyann...yakkk..

Main-jaa be jhant k Baal...

Ye suntey he Aashish seedha apni seat ki taraf nikal liya or humlog piche jaake baithgaye...

Meri body k baare mein bataadun as you all know Mera gussa bahot kharaab hai or vertigo ne usko or jyaada kharaab kardiya hai but treatment k time main Gussa control karna seekh Gaya Hun isliye ab mujhe gussa aashaani see nahi aata ..lekin aata hai tab bahot bhayaanak aata hai Jo mere mind k liye bahot khatarnaak hai...

Pehle Main frustrate hota Hun uske baad woh frustration gusse mein convert hoti hai slowly or convert hotey he main gand maardeta hun fir...isliye main control Karke baithgaya class mein...

Nicki mam ne class suru ki or us time mujhe realize hua ki mujhe lawda kuch nahi pata Kya chal Raha hai or mujhe pehle puraana Sab cover karna padega iske liye tab jaake kuch aage jaa paaunga but fuck this ye easy hai who cares..

Bore hone laga toh main Bench par sirr rakhke Sone ki koshish karne laga ....lekin kaamyaab Nahi hua or Puri class Aise he nikaal di Maine ...Nicki mam chali gayi or next class start hogayi ....hum firse bench see khaddey hue or scanner par fir se attendance lagaai or waapis seat par aagaye har class ki attendance alag alag lagti Hain scanner mein..or jaise he main attendance lagaake waapis jaaraha tha tabhi woh RITIKA madam class mein aagayi...

Riti-Oho ho...! Welcome Mr.AP...

Main-thanks...

Riti-Good To see you here...

Main-Same...

Ye bolke main waapis apni seat par aagaya or wahin
bench par sirr rakhke baithgaya ...thodi derr baad woh madam piche aai...

Riti-Ye Sab toh bahaar bhi hojaata class mein aae ho toh thoda padhlo...

Main-kuch samjh nahi aaraha pehle puraana clear karna padega uske baad class mein dhyaan dunga abhi befaltu mein ratta nahi maarna hai ...

Riti:-koi help caahiye toh bolna puraane syllabus mein...

Main-Sure...

Uske baad woh madam aage challi gayi ussi time Bhai kaa call aagaya ..

Main-Ji Bhai...

Deva- Thodi problem hai Ghar aajao ek baar ...

Main-Serious?

Deva-nahi normal he hai...

Main-ok aatey Hain .....

Iss class k end hotey he humlog ne card swap Kiya or nikal liye class se bc attendance bhi lag gayi or bahaar bhi aagaye...

Humlog haweli pohanchey toh wahaan Anjali and team already aachuki thi or wohlog mast coffee peerele they. .....

Main-Aaila Sablog idhar Aisa Kya hua...

Deva-aao Sab...

Humlog andar Drawing room mein aagaye.. Wahaan Main,Sam,Ravi,Abeer,Mangal,Ami ,Bahi ,Anjali ,Rajat,Ajay,Deepak,Jiya, Pooja or Rishi mojuud they...

Deva-So the problem wahi same hai tum sabka police k sath involvement ...

Mangal-Matlab. ....

Main-Matlab ye ki Opposition waalon ne sawaal uthaane suru kardiye honge ki humlog itana police k sath kyun rehtey hain I mean humlog kaa Kya kaam unke sath...

Deva-exactly ..lekin ye abhi andar ki baat hai or bahaar nahi aai hai lekin bahaar aai toh dikkat hojaaegi ...Kuch toh yahaan takk kehrahe Hain ki Police AP k ishaaron par chalti hai Jo wohlog boltey wahi karti hai Kya ye police Mangal ,Abeer ki personal hai wagairah wagairah...or media waalon ko jaise he opposition kaa statement milljaaega wohlog fir rukkenge nahi...ab unhe ye toh nahi keh shaktey ki Humlog sath he Hain toh Kya Kiya jaae..

Anjali-Agreed ye toh problem hogayi...

Main-yep...

Abeer-Shri Shri AP ji koi idea bataaiye...

Main-Actually ek idea hai...wahi puraane waala...

Deva-kya...

Main-consultant waala...waal Delhi ,Mumbai ,Kolkata ,Chennai etcetera big cities mein Local log As Police k public Consultant hotey Hain wohlog unofficially police he hotey Hain but koi powers nahi hoti unke pass bus woh advice detey Hain police ko ...In short police k helper hotey Hain Aisa kissi state mein nahi hai ki koi officially police kaa consultant ho toh kyun naa Haryana ko pehla Aisa state banaaya jaae ...

Deva-Gajab ...

Mangal-Brilliant ....

Deva-Double faayda ek opposition se pichha chhutega or tumlog openly police ki help Kar paaoge no. 2 isase bhi humaari he party kaa faayda hai kyunki ye kaafi badhiya kadam hai public ki security k liye toh public kaa support millega woh alag...

Main-Bus fir ek kaam Karo Harr District mein se kuch kaam k 5-6 bandey lo taaki ye naa ho ki keval humein he banaaya hai but bandey trustable hone caahiye ...fir Kal Subah ek badi si press conference karke Sab officially announce kardo ... Opposition ki fatt jaaegi ...

Mangal-Bilkul...

Abeer-Yep...

Deva- Sahi hai ...Gajab ...Dimag toh Tera he hai humlog toh waise he baithey Hain...

Main-Sadly true...

Deva-chup be...

Main-lol...

Uske baad Bhai Mangal or Abeer nikal Gaye sath mein Anjali and team bhi Bhai ne Haryana Police k top officers ki meeting bulaaali urgent...kaam Jaldi niptaana tha toh wohlog lag gaye ...or humlog ne Aaram se rest liya ...

late night takk Sab district k names aagaye Bhai k pass bus ab Subah announcement hojaani thi...

Continued...

...........30

Update-31(Where Are We?. ?)
​

Main aage kuch sochta usase pehle uss aadmin ne doobara woh kapda mere munh par lagaaya Maine koshish ki apni saans rokkaney ki par kaamyaab nahi hua kyunki Meri body nashe mein thi or Mera kahaa nahi maanrahi thi....main caahta toh Iss drug se fight Kar shakta tha Mera mind Aaram se jhell leta itane ko but agar Aisa karta toh woh Orr jyaada sunghaatey bc ganwaar log or jyaada mein fir Jaan kaa khatra bhi rehta hai ....isliye Maine koi virodh nahi Kiya or kuch minutes mein behonsh hogaya...

Uske baad Sab kuch blank hogaya bc kuch samjh mein Nahi aaya ki ye hua Kya ...Kon they yelog kahin Surendra k sathi toh nahi...Naa naa unki gand fatti paddi hogi already new life suru Kar chuke honge wohlog...toh Kon ho shakta hai...Vithal k bandey...?

Nahi Vithal jail mein hai or last time uski itani fatt gayi thi ki woh doobara uss side nahi jaaega ....bc ...

Main kitani derr behonsh Raha ye toh maalum nahi but Meri aankhein kissi k chilaane se khulli....bc sirr pura ghumm Raha tha or dard Kar Raha tha woh alag badi mushqill se aankhein khulli bhenchod...halki-2 ....5 minute baad Meri aankhein dhangse khulli toh Maine paaya ki ye awaaj Sam ki hai ..or main kissi baddi si puraani lekin sundarr si haweli k bade se hall mein ek pillar se bandha hua tha...or mere just bagal mein Sam or Ravi bandhey they...

Main-bhenchod ye Kya hai be...Kon they woh bhen k lawde...

Sam-chup be...left mein dekh...

Main-Kya hua bhossssdddd.......

Maine thoda ghumm k dekha toh meri gand fatt gayi or main gaali waapis khaa Gaya...kyunki mere left mein or Sam k just saamne ek Puri family khaddi thi...wahaan 4 aadmi achhe khasse kapdon mein 30-40 ki bich ki ummar k unke alaawa 3 auratein almost ussi ummar ki ...uske alaawa 4-5 gundey type bandey dandey Leke khaddey they...woh log shakal se Desi lag rahe they Gundon ne dhoti kurta pehna tha...but Auratein kaafi sajh dhaj k khaddi thi kaafi jwellery wagairaah pehni thi unhone kull milaake kissi Ameer family se belong kartey honge wohlog...

Main-Hi wassup...yaar achhi bhalli family se ho firoti maangtey hue sharam nahi aati...Bhagwaan ne itana Sab Diya hai toh ye kidnapping waala dhanda kyun kartey ho...

Sam-(Aaram se) bhosdk Style naa maar gand footjaaegi...

Main-Sorry ....

Unlog k faces kaafi Serious they najaane kyun bc Maine toh kuch bhi naa Kiya tha unka ....

Main-Yaar ghurrtey he rahoge yaa bataoge bhi.. ki hua Kya hai...humlog kahaan Hain or kyun Hain ...tumlog ho Kon...??

Gunda1-Chupkar Sab pata chaljaaega filhaal chup baith...

Ravi-dont mind him haan Bhai he is like this all time...

Sam-bc FBI waalon ne kidnap nahi Kiya hai inko English mein Kya samjhaaraha hai .....

Ravi-Sorry my bad...

Main-Bhai kam se kam khadda toh kardey niche Farsh bahot thanda hai...

Gunda2-Koi hotel nahi hai ye thakur Sahaab aatey he honge chup chaap baitho..

Humlog 10-15 minutes aise he baithey rahe or wohlog humein aise he ghurrtey rahe...bc Kya chutiya family hai aise bhi koi ghurrta hai Bhenchod...Sharam k maare Maine he gardan niche karli....or bc ek toh shardi thi uppar se niche farsh bc meri gand freeze hone Lagi thi bimaar Orr hojaaunga bc...

Or finally humaara intejaar khatam hua Haveli kaa gate khulla or saamne se ek 60-62 ki ummar kaa aadmi andar aaya Robdaar cehra safed tanni Hui muchein sirr par pagdi safed Kurta niche dhoti pairon mein Desi Juti...hath mein chaddi or kalaai par sone kaa mota saa kadda...uske piche -2 kam se kam 20 hattey kattey gundey or unke alaawa 1 25-26 ki age kaa ladka or 20-22 ki ek Sundar c ladki...Bc patla sareer bhurri aankhein Kaale Baal bilkul Desi lehjey k Salwaar suit mein Qyaamat lag rahi thi woh ...

Uss budhaau ko aata dekh humaare saamne khaddey log piche hatt Gaye...haash bc lawde kabse ghurre jaarahe they.....woh budhau apne serious thobdey ko Leke mere just saamne aake khadda hogaya...bc ab ye ghurrega Gay toh nahi Hain yelog ...yakkkkkkkk
Bc kahaan fans Gaya...baat ki suruwaat uss ladke ne ki Jo budhau k sath aaya tha..

Ladka-Dimag toh theek hai tumhaara Thakur Sahaab k saamne baithey ho...khaddey hojaao...

Main-ghanta be Yahi toh main bolraha Hun khadda Karo kabse niche baraf jamm gayi hai...Kaise khaddey honge 6 jagah toh baandh rakha hai....

Ladka-Wajir kholo unhe ..

Ye sunn ek hatta katta Banda saamne aaya bc Kya Jaanwar jaisa sareer tha uska....usne humaare hath pair kholle or main Turan uchhalke khadda hogaya...or bc apne bums massalne laga iski maa degree celcius gand fatt gayi...

Ladka-Vinay Singh naam Hai Mera or ye hain.. A ladke theek se khaddey raho...

Main-Rukk be..ab bolo....

Ispar woh budhau bola....

Budhau- Mera naam hai Thakur Baldev Singh....

Main-Myself AP nice to meet you...

Ye kehke Maine hath badhaaya milaane k liye...

Sam-(Araam Se) bhai please rukjaa yaar bahot maar padegi kasam se...majaak majaak mein gand footjaaegi....

Ravi-Main toh bolne waala Hun ye humaare sath nahi hai...

Main-Tau Ji humein yahaan kaaeko laaya Gaya Hai...? Or Kya tumlog jaantey ho humlog kon hain..?

Wajir-dhamki deta Hai humein..

Main-are nahi bhaisahaab dhamki nahi generally puch raha hun ki "Kya aaplog humein jaantey Hain aisa karke.. "...

Thakur-haan Haan Pata Hai Pata Hai Uttar Bhaarat k sabse taakatwar pareewaar se ho tumlog... Deva Singh k bhai ho...

Main-are waah.. Fir ab ye bhi bataado humein yahaan kyun laaya Gaya Hai...?

Thakur-sab Pata chal jaaega tumhaare sathiyon ko aanedo...

Main-mere sathi kon sathi...

Bc kahin Abeer wagairaah ko toh nahi laane waale... Lawda Mera Abeer gand fodd dega inki fodd toh main bhi deta agar expected hota toh Bc chloroform ne maai chhod di...

Vinay-Wajir iske sath ek ladki bhi thi woh kahaan Hai...?

Main-kon ladki...

?

Wajir-woh bhai police waalon k sath rehti Hai aashaan nahi Hai uthaana Bhaanu gayaa Hai bandey leke mouka miltey he uthaalega...

Main-what the fuck Ami... Usko kyun uthaarahe..?

Vinay-kyunki woh tere sath thi... Or bhaasa sudhaaro apni yahaan ganwaar nahi hain koi sabko English aati Hai..

Bhenchod Ami ko kidnap karenge Bc Usko hath pair todne kaa mouka milljaaega...

Main-sorry bhai but Kitane bandey Gaye hain Usko lene..

Wajir-8 hain...

Main-4-5 toh pakaa Gaye samjho...lekin baaki leaaenge Usko...

Wajir-ek ladki Hai woh kya karlegi...

Main-woh toh Tera Bhaanu bataaega aake...

Thakur-insabko andar leke jaao Mehmaan aane waale hain ye sab hataao yahaan se...

Wajir-ji thakur sahaab..

Ye bol usne humein sath Liya or seedha uss haweli k third floor par legaya... Bc jo bhi ho haweli thi bahot he shanaadaar... Woh humein ek alishaan kamre mein leke aaya... Jisme 2 bade-2 beds king-size uske alawwa Almiraah wagairaah attached bathroom Bc...

Wajir-yahaan rukko tumlog...

Main-kyu bhai baandhega nahi...

Wajir-ha ha ha..

Main-wtf..

Wajir-kyun baandhun..?

Main-bhaag Gaye toh humlog..

Wajir-yahaan k 4on taraf k almost 20 gaon thakur sahaab k hain.. Harr gaon mein thakur sahaab k bandey toh lagaalo tum iss haweli se bahaar nikal bhi Gaye jo ki impossible Hai tum nahi nikal shaktey iss haweli se bahaar but by chance agar nikal bhi Gaye toh jaaoge kahaan...itani maar padegi ki paglaa jaaoge or fir waapis yahin...

Main-gajab confidence Hai bhai tumhaara... But ye toh bataado ki humein yahaan laaya kyun gayaa Hai...

Wajir-woh sab jaldi he pata chal jaaega...

Ye bolke woh wahaan se nikal Gaya...

Ravi-bhosdk tune koi kand toh nahi Kiya Tha naa...

Main-lawda kand karunga be aaya hun tabse Muth bhi nahi maari kand ghanta karunga...

Ravi-toh yelog kon hain...

Main-mujhe kya maalum bhosdk tumlog bataao... Kahin meri gairhaajri mein tumlog me toh kissi ko nahi peldiya Tha...

Sam-lawda tere jaane k baad humlog ghar se college or college se ghar bus...

Main-toh ye bhen k lawde hain kon... Chalo ek kaam kartey hain humein kya kya maalum Hai inke baare mein woh bataatey hain... Let's see kya pata chalega...

Sam-Mobile wagairaah kahaan Gaye Bc 2-3 laakh kaa nukshaan toh yahi hojaaega warna...

Main-bandey Desi hain but Tejj hain durr fainke honge taaki track wagairaah naa ho...

Sam-Agreed.. Paison k liye ye nahi Kiya Hai INhone ye confirm Hai...

Main-Shabbas... apni family k sath bhi koi panga nahi Hai inka ye confirm Hai...

Sam-Gajab... 20 gaon Kam se Kam iska Matlab iss area kaa baap yahi Hai...

Main-Haan sahi Bola... Baaki family members chup they iska Matlab khouff ghar se he suru hota Hai iska. ..

Sam-Desi hain lekin well mannered or well behaved hain English bhi aati Hai...

Main-Haan... +Joint family Hai....

Ravi-Bhai jo bhi ho Ladkkyaan maal hain maal..

Ye sun hum donk ne Ravi ko ghurra...

Main-Abe bhosdk... Isko Maa behen ki gaali bhi nahi de shakta bhai Hai bhosdkaa...

Sam-GAND fodd de bhosdk ki gaali deke kya karega..

Continuesd....

"You’re fighting a war That I’ve already won."
Update-32(Holy fuck)

​

Humlog ne Sab calculate karke dekha but kuch samajh nahi aaya ki ye log kon hain kyun hain... Kareeb 2 gantey baad humaare room kaa gate khulla or woh Wajir waapis andar aaya...

Wajir-aajao Bahar tumhaare dost aagaye hain...

Main-kon dost?

Wajir-aake khud dekhlo...

Main-chalo re...

Humlog uss Wajir k sath - 2 niche aae toh hall kaa najaara dekh meri aankhein khulli rehgayi.. Kyunki wahaan Ami toh thi he uske alaawaRohit, Ashish, or Ajit bhi they....

Main-what the fuck....?

Ye sun Unlog ne meri taraf dekha or humein wahaan dekh or bhi shocked hogaye..

Ami-AP... What the hell tum log yahaan kya Kar raha Hai...

Main-hindi kaa balaatkaar bandh Kar... Or humlog wahi Kar rahe jo tumlog Kar rahe... Kidnapped AF...

Wahaan Unlog k alaawa Thakur woh ladka Vinay Woh maal ladki uske alaawa woh 3 aadmi or shayad baaki 3 ladies unki wife thi.. Uske alaawa wahaan Wajir or uske 10-11 gundey bhi they but twist ye Tha abki baar unke pass revolvers thi...

Main-tumlog yahaan kya Kar rahe ho bc..

Rohit-No clue bhai bc khopaddi par revolver dharke Gym k bahaar se leke aae hain...

Ashish-Same...

Vinay-aapas mein he baat Kar loge kya...

Main-terese Kar letey hain bhai tu ye bataadey ab yahaan kyun leke aaya Hai...

Vinay -abhi bhi nahi samjhe...? Yaa naa samjh hone kaa Natak Kar rahe...

Main-Haan natak ko hum bollywood hero horahe hain kaaeka naatak bhai mujhe toh ye bhi naa Pata main kahaan hun kyun hun or kaise hun....

Sab-same no idea...

Vinay-Tumlog Yamunanagar mein ho...

Main-What the fuck....

Rohit-bc...

Vinay-Yamunanagar Haryana k bilkul....

Main-Bhai London se nahi hain humlog Pata Hai Yamunanagar haryana k border outer par padta Hai... But sawaal ye Hai ki humlog yahaan hain kyun...?

Thakur-Woh apne is Amitabh Bachan Se pucho...

Ravi-Nahi Amitabh nahi Ashish Hai iska naam toh...

Sam-Abe chupre yaar...

Main-Ashish tune kya Kiya bc...

Ashish-w. W. W. Woh....

Main-Abe wowowoow kya khelraha Hai seedha-2 bol kya Hua...?

Ashish-idhar aao side mein...

Hum sablog ek side ko aagaye...

Main-ab bol re...

Ashish-yaad Hai Maine tujhse pucha Tha ki kuc log mujhe dikkat derahe hain Villagers hain chindi chorr type Tera naam ledun unko daraane k liye...

Main-bc don't fucking tell me ye log wahi hain...

Ashish-haan...

Main-Lawde yelog chindi chorr nahi tere baap k bhi baap hain... Kam se Kam background toh jaanleta inka...

Sam-Haan bc... Or Hua kya puri baat bata....

Ashish- Jyoti...

Main-Ab ye kon Hai bc...

Ashish-iss thakur ki Poti... Granddaughter... OR meri girlfriend.... Ex bol shaktey.. Matlab girlfriend bhi nahi keh shaktey ban Shakti thi Haan ye keh shaktey itana serious relationship nahi thi bus friends se thoda uppar..

Main-Wtf..

Bhen k lawde ye kya hota Hai friends se thoda uppar girlfriend se thoda niche bhosdk sabji mandi aaya Hai...

Ashish-toh Hua yun ki hum dono relationship mein they not so serious but theek thaak tab ye Vinay ne humein dekhliya ye uska bhai hai ussdin ye isko sath le aaya waapis.. Or fir Kuch gundey leke humein samjhaane Gaya Agar ye seedha boldeta ki meri behen se durr reh toh main maanjaata par ye bc wahaan jaake Hawa jamaane laga toh Maine bhi jhaad diya tab ye waapis chala Gaya fir mereko phone karne laga ki Meri behen ko tumse koi Matlab nahi Hai wagairaah-2..maine fir sunaadi isko... Or Maine tujhse pucha ki Tera naam ledun kya Darashall Tera naam Maine already lerakha Tha woh toh bus formality k liye puchs terese... tab jaake inhone phone karne bandh kiye they bc mujhe laga darr Gaye honge tere naam se but bc firse ye khud aagaya college jiss din Woh murder Hua Tha or bolne laga meri behen se durr reh usko terese koi Matlab nahi Hai uski shaadi Tay kardi Hai humne tune usse fansaaya tha toh Maine kahaa Agar ye baat Hai toh meri baat karwaado clear hojaaega Sab I mean mujhe usase koi Matlab nahi agar usko mujhse koi Matlab nahi toh.... Toh fir akad dikhaane laga toh Maine fir sunaadi isko ki bc aukaat - 2 karta Hai mujhe nahi jaanta kya Baap opposition kaa leader Hai sathmein AP Mera best friend Hai uss din tumlog jab Ami ko college ghumarahe they naa uss time maine dikhaayaa ki woh dekh mere dost akele he kaafi hain tere liye... Tab fir ye dhamki Dene laga toh Maine bhi hawa maarne ko boldiya ki main dekhta hun kaise hoti Hai shaadi... Karke dikhaana... Bus ye matter Hai...

Main-bus... Bc bus bus what the shit ye matter nahi lawde ye kand Hai kand yelog Tere baap hain...

Rohit-holy fuck... Bc kamsekam puchh toh Liya Kar bhai kand karne se pehle...

Sam-naa naa jab toh isse Hawa banaani hoti Hai bc bada aaya sunaane waala Hawa banaaney k chakkar mein humaari Hawa nikalwaaega tu....

Ravi-lawde shaadi nahi Hone dunga se kya Matlab Tha Tera bc ye kya baal Vivaah karwaarahe jo tu rokega...

Main-ab jab ladki ko he terese koi Matlab nahi toh boldey ki bhai bindaas karwaado shaadi humein koi problem nahi Hai humlog chaltey hain...

Ravi-Haan bhai bolde...

Ashish-Boldeta hun usme kya Hai... Chalo...

Humlog waapis Aage aae..

Main-excuse me bhai mujhe just abhi matter Pata chala we are very-2 sorry kya haina young blood Hai toh munh mein jo aata Hai woh nikal jaata Hai intentions galat nahi they iske... Or abhi bhi bindaas shaadi karwaado aap humein koi problem nahi Hai.... OR kripya Kar humein ijaajat dijiye... Shaadi mubaarakh.. Humlog nikalein...

Ye sun unsabney humein ek sath ghurra.. Bhen k lawdo ek toh ye ghurrna bandh Karo warna Maa chhod dunga tumhaari..

Ispar woh Thakur gusse mein utha or chilaaya..

Thakur-kahin nahi jaaoge tumlog jabtak Jyoti ki shaadi nahi hojaati tumlog yahin rahoge... Rokk k dikhaana kon rokega..

Sam-hum kyun rokenge bhalla humein koi problem naa Hai...

Thakur-jyaada baatein Matt banaao humaare saamne tumne humein dhamki di Thakur baldev singh ko dhamki mere pareewaar ko mitaaega tu.. Mujhe barbaad karega tu.... MUJHSE Beekh mangwaaega tu...

Majn-(aaram se)Bhen k lawde Ashish aisa kya-2 Bola tu..

Ashish-(Aaram se) or bhi bahot kuch...

Main-bus beta hogaya kaam firtoh....

Thakur-4 din baad shaadi Hai Jyoti ki... Tabtak tum yahin rahoge Agar aise nahi maanoge toh fir jabardasti karna humein aata hai or humein nahi Matlab tum kon ho hoge Tum Deva k bhai hum thakur hain ghar ki beti k liye jaan le bhi shaktey hain or de bhi denge...

Main-toh isko rakho naa chicha humein kyun sath mein rakhe ho Kam se Kam humein toh jaanedo...
Ispar woh budhau mujhpar chilaaya...

Thakhr-koi nahi jaaega yahaanse samjaa tu...

Main-Woh toh theek Hai chicha lekin itani unchi awaaj mere saamne nahi karneka...

Ye sun unke pure pareewaar ki aankhein bahaar aagayi...

Vinay-a ladke tameej se...

Main-chup re Iss Ashish ki Tarah chindi chorr nahi hun jo tu dhamkaadega samjaa AP naam suna hoga or kand bhi dekhe honge mere ijjat se rakhoge toh ijjat se rahunga ye thakur giri mere uppar nahi challaana boldeta hun warna fir kand toh main bahot pehle se karta aaya hun...

Ye sunke thakur or Vinay mujhe ektak ghurrne lage but Unka ek aadmi danda liye meri taraf badha 5'6 height Mota tagda sareer... Bc proper gaon waale Sab more tagdey he hotey...

Aadmi-kya Bola re Haan kya Bola...

Woh aa toh raha Tha mujhe darrane lekin Ami ko laga mujhe maarne aaraha isliye woh mere piche se nikalke Aage aai or ek he second mein ek flying kick uske thobdey par di bc munh se thook or khoon kaa mixture udaa uske mujhe Munh par hath rakhna padda apne bc yuckk... or woh dhadaam se niche giraa...

Ye dekh k Hall mein ghapp Shanti Chaa gayi thakur and family ko toh kaato toh khoon nahi yahi haalat baaki sabki thi I mean unko maalum Tha ki Ami ye Sab jaantti Hai but aaj live example milgaya Tha...

Main-what the hell ye kya Tha... Woh khaali daraane ko aaraha Tha....

Ami-really... And how do you know that...?

Main-bhoolgAyi main shakal dekh k aukaat padhleta hun saamne waale ki..

Ami-Haan toh main nahi padh Shakta Na dimag...

Rohit-bc ye toh Bruce Lee Hai...

Ajit- sachmein bc...

Ravi-Marr toh nahi Gaya be woh...

Maine check Kiya toh abhi theek Tha bus thoda shocked Tha or thobdey par lagne k Karan dimaag ghum Gaya hoga...

Continued.....

#1,143

Update-33(Shit)

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Or jaise he wohlog shock se bahaar aae unhone apni bandukkein humpar taandi...

Thakur-bandukkein niche...

Main-thanks...

Thakur-Jigra Hai tujhmein...

Main-Jigra toh dekha he nahi Hai chicha aapne...

Thakur-humne kidnap Kiya Hai toh Sab kuch soch samjh k he Kiya hoga ab dekhlo ye tumpar depend karta Hai yaa toh aaram se raho mehmaan banke yaa fir hum tumhe rakhein kidnappers ki Tarah... Humlog dono he Kar shaktey hain Bandon ki humaare pass koi kami nahi Hai..

Ravi-Isko chhodo humlog toh mehmaan banke he khuss hain..

Rohit-Hard Agree....

Sam-Yep mehmaan will be good...

Thakur-Theek Hai... Wajir andar lejaao inhe...

Main-Ek salaah deta hun chicha aapko Pata Hai ki aap humein mehmaan ki Tarah rakhenge or fir chhod denge toh fir bahot dikkat hojaaega Deva bhai fir ye nahi dekhenge ki aapne kiss intentions se humein kidnap Kiya Hai unko kon samjhaaega...

Thakur-uski jarurat nahi padegi...

Uske baad humlog ko woh Wajir firse ussi kamre mein le aaya...

Wajir-Ek baar Sab yahin baitho sone k liye sabko alag kamra miljaaega...

Ye bolke woh wahaan se chalaa Gaya or uske jaatey he just jaatey he Ajit ne Ashish k pait mein punch diya or piche se Sam ne gand par laat maari woh niche girra or girtey he Rohit ne ek or laat uski pond par di...

Ajit-Bhoss....

Ye bol woh chup hogaya Ami ko wahaan dekh k shayad Sharma Gaya ladki k saamne gaali Dene se...

Main-tension not usko aadhi gaaliyaan samjh nahi aaengi or aaengi toh bhi koi farak naa padta...

Rohit-bhosdk aise kand firstly karne he nahi or agar karna pade toh fir pehle humeinn
Bata ye nahi ki agar tu Lucky k sath Hai toh humlog Teri help nahi karenge politics alag Hai dosti usase uppar bahot pehle se jaantey hain tereko humlog samjhaa...

Ashish-Sorry yaar heat of the moment mein yaad he naa raha...

Main-Bc woh Sab chhod hogaya so hogaya Ashish ki bhi galati nahi thi Naa usne ladki k sath kuch galat Kiya or naa he koi galat intentions they iske or ye Bola bhi tab Jab uss Vinay ne Hawa dikhaai toh overall itani bhi galati naa Hai iski.. Or galati toh bc inki bhi nahi hain thakur log apni ijjat k liye bahot protective hotey hain... Toh galati kissi ki nahi hain...

Sam- Bhenchod Agar galti kissi ki nahi Hai toh hum kya yahaan Vote maanganey aae hain...

Main-Bc ab ye Pata Karo yahaan se nikalein kaise...

Ami-Woh Sab toh tab Pata chalega jab koi idea ho iss jagah kaa.... eyes par cloth baandhke laaye they mujhe., route yaad karne ki koshish ki but bahot lamba route Tha...

Rohit-tereko chloroform sunghaaya Tha naa...

Main-Naa usko bachna aata Hai insabse easy Hai uske liye behonsh hone kaa natak Kar rahi hogi ye...

Ami-exactly...

Rohit-Gajab...

Sam-Apna backup aane k chances kitane hain...

main-keh nahi shakta 50-50 Kyunki wohlog kabhi nahi dhund paaenge humlog ko inhone kidnap Kiya Hai Kyunki Ashish ne ye baat kissi ko bataai nahi hogi toh sawaal he paida naa hota ki woh directly yahaan aajaaenge.. lekin Haan agar Tum logon ko uthaatey time koi cctv wagairaah mein milgaye Hon ye toh fir alag baat Hai Kyunki jahaan se humein uthaaya wahaan koi cctv nahi Tha..

Ami-Nowhere near me...

Ashish - Same sadak se uthaaya bc...

Rohit-Not sure maybe hoga gym k outside....

Main-or yelog itane samjhdaadr toh hain humaare mobiles kahin durr he rakhe honge..

Sam-Matlab chances Kam he hain... Bc 4 din takk yahaan Rehna padega iss kamre mein bandh...

Ravi-Nahi re Bola naa usne Orr rooms bhi denge....

Main-Bhen k lawde tu chup he raha Kar Teri gand kaat dunga main kabhi...or be lawda Mera 4 din rahega yahaan koi naa koi plan toh banaana padega....

Ami -let's fight them all... I can take them all..

Main-Chup re... These motherfuckers have at least 100 guards in here that too with guns... That is the problem.... Or Agar humlog ne force Kiya toh yelog goli chalaane se darrenge nahi...

Ravi-Ek kaam kartey kissi ek ko yahaan se nikaaaltey secretly woh bahaar jaake Bhai ko bataaega fir bhai bandey leke aaege or inki maai chhod denge...

Main-Sound awesome...

Ami-main Karega aaram se...

Main-Shut up.... I will do it... .. Teri hindi bahaar kissi ko samjh nahi aaegi.. Or naa he tujhe route maalum apne area takk..

Rohit-ghar takk thodi Jaana haibe yahaan se nikalke phone bhi toh Kar shaktey...

Main-ye log k 20 gaon hain bc or harr gaon mein bandey woh alag pakadey Gaye toh kaam khalaas isliye sochraha hun inke area se nikalke phone karun but uske liye pehle toh inke area kaa layout Jaananaa padega... Fir haweli kaa map banaana padega ki kahaan se nikala jaae.. Raatko nikalne k chances high honge toh ussi time karenge first of all pehle Sab info ikatha karenge... Let's start mission rescue...

Sab-Yes sir...

Rohit-bhosdko chillaao Matt baap ki shaadi Mein aae ho kya...

Main-Abe Teri item Hai konsi inmein se waise
.....

Ashish-Konsi bhi nahi abtak toh naa dikhi...

Main-Toh ye Vinay k sath ladki kon thi...

Ashish-uski choti behen Kritika... Iski photos dekhi hain ek do baar... Or woh jo 3 couples haina aged woh budhau k betey or unki wife's hain.. 2 toh Jyoti k cacha cachi hain or ek uski Maa or bapu....

Main-Meri baat chalaaega ye Kritika k sath..?

Ashish-Lawda chalaaega Mera ek baar baat chalaai thi yahaan fanse hain agli baar seedha uppar honge bc...

Main-let's see try kartey hain... Dikhne mein toh theek thaak Hai...

Sam-lawde first of all tujhse set naa hogi or agar hogayi toh ye bhen k lawde shaadi karwaa denge seedhi Tum dono ki... Bol Karega shaadi...

Main-lawda Mera Karega shaadi bc... Time kya hua re....?

Sam-No idea...

Rohit-Raat hochuki Hai I guess 8-9 k bich kaa time hoga...

Main-bc khaana bhi khaana Hai abhi chloroform ne Maa chodd di hogi calories ki ab bharr pait khaana mille toh chain paddey... Warna dikkat hojaaegi...

Rohit-Tagdi bhook lagi hai bhai...

Thodi derr baad woh Wajir wahaan aaya...

Sam-Yaar kamsekam khaana toh khilwaado...

Rohit-haan bc paani takk naa pilaaya Hai tumlog ne aise Thodi mehmaanon ko rakhtey hain...

Wajir-khaana lag Gaya hai...

Rohit-toh laa dey bhai jaldi se...

Wajir-nahi...

Ravi-what the fuck nahi kaa k Matlab Hai bc...

Wajir-Niche aake khaana padega sabke sath...

Rohit-No fucking way...

Main-Ghanta be... Niche tumlog bc ghurrtey rahoge aise khaana nahi khaa shaktey humlog...

Wajir-humaare yahaan mehmaan pariwaar k sath he khaana khaatey hain...

Main-mehmaan ko hum konsa teri bua k ladke hain... Bc formality k liye mehmaan Hain yahaan laake dedo khaalenge...

Wajir-thakur sahaab kaa order Hai ye Agar khaana khaana Hai toh 10 minute mein niche aajao warna bukhe raho... Gate khulla Hai...

Ye bolke woh wahaan se nikal Gaya...

Main-bhenchod ajeeb lawdapanthi Hai... ye kya nayi bakchodi Hai bc ab....

Sam-Haan bc sabke bichmein baithke...

Rohit-bc bukh bhi toh lagi haibe....

Ravi-Haan bc bahot jyaada....

Ashish - Haan be aise raat nahi nikalegi....

Main-chalein fir...?

Ravi-or kya Kar shaktey..

Sam-let's go...

Main-OK.. Lekin ek baat dhyaan rakho koi kuch nahi bolega unko bolnedena apna chup chaap khaana khaao or nikalo...

Sam-yep...

Rohit-lets go...

Continued...

Update-35(Mission Failed, Caught!)

​

Round lagaane k baad woh Wajir humein waapis Andar Le aaya.. Tabtak woh vinay and party andar jaa chuki thi toh Wajir ne andar aatey he woh haweli kaa bada saa gate bandh Kiya or fir usko lock lagaake chaabi khud rakhli... Bc itana bada gate Bina lock k naa khulega mujhse uppar se taala laga raha maadarjaat...

Main-sun bhai alag alag rooms rehndey humaara 2-3 he room mein karwaadena Sab...

Wajir-kyun..?

Main-phone bhi nahi Hai TV bhi nahi Hai itani jaldi sone ki aadat Hai nahi thoda time pass he karlenge...

Wajir-theek Hai theek Hai lekin raat ko Shorr nahi hona caahiye...

Main-bhajan kirtan nahi karna Hai bhai... Baatein he karenge...

Wajir-theek Hai ye room toh Hai he tumhaara iske aage waale 2 or lelena... Kuch kapdey already hain rooms mein... Or sath mein bistar bhi lagchuke Hain...jab tak sone kaa time nahi hota tumhaara kissi bhi ek room mein baith jaao...

Main-thanks men really appreciate that...

Wajir-Your welcome...

Ye bolke woh wahaan se chala gaya or hum Sab ussi room mein aagaye jisme pehle they...

Rohit-Bhosdk gate dekha haweli kaa... Lawde Raja Maharajaon k time kaa Hai... Bc..

Main-lawde uppar se locked Hai...

Ashish-Toh ab bc.... Plan cancel...

Main-chup be kalmuhe....

Ravi-lo bhai bistar baantletey hain...

Main-Bistar baanton tumlog apun toh aaj raat he kalti hoga idhar se or fir backup leke aaunga...

Sam-lekin kaise...

Main-ye khidki dekh raha Hai... Yahaan se jaaunga...

Sam-bc... Gand nahi fattegi...

Main-easy haibe...jyaada uncha nahi hoga... Nahi fattegi...

Ye kehke Maine khidki kholi toh bc gand fattke hath mein aagayi 3rd floor kaafi uncha Tha iski Maa kaa ghosla...

Main-nope fattegi bilkul fattegi..

Dikkat ye thi ki third floor se second floor takk even koi balcony bhi nahi thi balcony seedha 1st floor par thi bc lekin wahaan takk kaise jaaunga... Main dikkat first floor takk pohanchney mein thi aage toh easy Tha....or uppar se khidki piche ki taraf thi toh koi guards nahi they...

Ami-ek idea Hai...

Main-kya...

Ami-ye bed sheets(Chaddar) haina Inki rope banaatey hain humlog.. Yahaan se first floor ki balcony takk toh pohanchegi....

Main-brilliant way to go...

Rohit-gajab...lekin deewar kaa kya Karega

Main-Abe niche jaake kuch dhundlunga koi lakdi, chair drum wagairaah kuch bhi boost lene k liye... Thoda wait kartey hain sabko sonedo fir bhaagunga....

Ye kehke humlog baithgaye tabtak wohlog bistar baantaney Lahey..or kareeb 2 ghantey baad sabkuch ready Kar Liya.... 2 bed sheets thi jo first floor ki balcony se only 2-4 feet uppar rehgayi thi...

Main-gajab Ami...

Rohit-yahaan tabse dekh raha hun koi guard nahi aaya Hai...easy Hai...

Main-let's do it then....

Sab-best of luck dude...

Main-thanks...

Rohit-bhosdk jaldi leke aaiyo backup....

Main-Sure thing...

Ye kehke main khidki par chadda or bed sheet pakadke niche latak gaya...

Main-bhosdko dhangse pakadna chhod diya toh gand foot jaaegi meri...

Ravi-tension naa le...

Ye bol main niche ko uttara dono hath se woh rassi kasske pakdi Hui or taangein deewar par full movie type scene Tha bc but dikkat ye Hai movie mein girrega toh niche soft hota hai idhar bhenchod gand marrjaaegi... Mast Thandi thandi Hawa chal rahi thi bc shardiyaan jaatey-2 dikkat derahi thi... Jyaada andherra nahi Tha or jyaada roshani bhi nahi thi as 2-3 lights jall rahi thi garden mein... . Main ahista ahista niche pohancha balcony khaali thi even gate bhi closed Tha isliye main rope k end takk pohancha or aaram se balcony mein uttargaya... Haashhh! Bc main problem yahi thi ab aage aaram se uttar shakta Tha ....main balcony ki deewar k uppar chadda or side mein lage lohe k mote pipe ko ek hath se pakada or fir ahista ahista ek pair wahaan rakha or fir dusre hath se pipe ko kaske pakada and then dusra pair pipe par laaya... Waise toh main balcony se niche kudd shakta Tha aaram se kyunki jyaad unchi nahi thi but usase awaaj jyaada hoti isliye pipe theek Tha... Maine uppar dekha toh wohlog khidki se jhaank jhaank k dekh rahe they bc movie chalrahi Hai kya... Or finally main niche ground par uttar gaya haash! Bc finally niche aagaya Maine niche se uppar dekha toh bc bahot uncha lag raha Tha kaafi unchaai thi... Ab mere saamne ek he cheej baaki thi deewar... Main deewar par chaddne k liye koi cheej dhundane laga toh mujhe ek lohe ka khaali drum dikha jo deewar se thodi durr Tha Agar bhaagke main iske uppar jump leke uppar kuddunga toh aaram se pakad lunga uppar se... Maine woh drum hilaaya toh thoda weight Tha usme isliye Maine usse uthaana theek samjhaa Maine usse uthaana caaha par woh waapis girr gaya jisase halki si awaaj Hui or woh awaaj iss sunshaan raat mein thodi loud sunaai di... Bc achaa hua kissi ne Suna nahi warna chudd jaata... Lekin woh kehtey haina "Jab Kismat mein he hain lawde toh kaise khaaega Pakode kyun be bhen k lawde.." mujhe uss time kutton k bhonkney ki awaajein aai 2 se jyaada kuttey they or unki awaaj dekh k lagraha Tha ki woh idhar he aarahe they woh bhi bahot jaldi se....

Maine ek mini second mein Sab calculate Kiya no fucking way main itani jaldi ye drum wahaan lagaake deewar paR chadd jaaunga pakada jaaunga gand marrjaaegi... Isliye Maine agli he second waapis uss pipe ki Taraf doud lagaadi or bhenchod seedha jump maarke bandar k maafik half pipe cross kargaya or fir jaldi-2 uppar chhadne laga... Tab woh kuttey udhar ko aaye unka bhonkana bandh hogaya Tha as unhe wahaan kuch deekha nahi or unko dekh Maine speed slow kardi bilkul aaram - 2 se Bina sound uppar chaddne laga bc 3no k 3 pitbul mote tagdey maadarjaat ye toh cheer faad kardetey agar fans jaata toh woh idhar udhar ghumein lekin unhe kuch nahi Milla or idhar main balcony par chadd gaya iss bich woh 2-3 baar or bhonkein... Aaj nahi nikaal shaktey pehle kutton ki setting Karni padegi isliye Maine uppar ishaara Kiya.. Or fir bedsheets pakadke uppar chaddne laga lekin bc fir wahi baat Kismat mein he lawde they Main jaise he uppa chadta balcony kaa gate khulla or koi bahaar aaya koi kya bc Kritika thi bc night suit mein maal lag rahi thi... Abe maal nahi lawde woh gand marwaadegi usne ek baar niche dekha or dusri he second uski najar mujhpar paddi mujhe dekh k woh shocked rehgayi maybe cehra bhi naa dikha ho usse mujhe Pata Tha woh chilaaegi isliye pehle he Maine woh bedsheets chhodi or balcony mein kuddgaya or iss Tarah kudda ki Mera hath uske munh par padda jisase woh balcony mein girri or main just uske uppar girra.... Aaah! Ye scene toh bc movies mein he dekha Tha aaj ho bhi gaya... Main uske uppar Tha totally or uska pura sareer main apne sareer par mehsush Kar paaraha Tha bc kya boobs they uske holy fuck meri chest k niche kuchall Gaye they woh.. Meri aankein uski aankhon mein thi woh shocked thi but Mera cehra dekh thodi Kam shocked Hui shayad usko laga koi chorr worr hoenga... Bc pehla adultery scene aaya Tha aaj story mein gajab...

Continued...

Update-36(Saved)

​
Kritika-ummmmmm! Hummmmmnnn...

Main-sorry I didnt understand a word you just said..

Hath hataaega tab naa bolegi bhosdk...
Oh shit..
Main-chilaana nahi Haan..
Maine hath hataaya toh uske munh se pehla word ye nikala...

Kri-tum yahaan kya Kar rahe ho...?

Main-juth nahi bolunga bhaagne ki try Kar raha Tha lekin fail hogaya tumhaare kuttey aagaye...aise jaanwar koi paalta Hai kya bhalla yaar...

Kri-main bhi sochun wohlog itana kyun bark Kar rahe hain...

Main-My bad...

Kri-Ab uthoge...

Main-oh! Fuck sorry...

Ye bolke Main uske uppar se utha or usko uthne k liye hath diya jispar usne mujhe ghurr
Kar dekha toh Maine hath waapis hataaliya... Bc bhalaai kaa toh jamaana he nahi Hai... Woh khaddi Hui Maine uppar dekha toh wHaan naa toh bedsheet thi or naa He woh log... Bc even khidki bhi bandh kargaye they gajab bc...

Kritika - Tum Bhaag kyun rahe they...

Main-what do you mean tum Bhaag kyun rahe they kidnapped hun yaar bhaagunga nahi toh kya karunga I can't live like this... I am bored like hell... I will die if I stay here more..

Kritika - oh! Hello.. Kidnapper ki Tarah rakhtey toh kya kartey..?

Main-toh theek Tha Kam se kam bandhey toh rehtey yaa behonsh rehtey...

Kri-fir kaise bhaagtey...?

Main-main koi naa koi raasta nikaal he leta you know I am too fast..

Kri-fainkna bandh karoge tum..? Kitana fainkoge...

Main-internet wagairaah nahi chalaati kya...?

Kri-main faltu cheejein search nahi karti...

Main-newspaper toh aata hoga... Are woh chhodo TV par toh news dekhti hogi... Woh bhi chhodo aajkal toh mere return k baad social media par bhi main he chaaya hun... Kamsekma kahin toh dekha hoga ki main kon hun...

Kri-bol toh aise rahe ho jaise hero ho koi..

Main-excuse me I am bigger then a hero in North India... Iron man hun idhar kaa main...

Kri-whatever... Dekho abhi main daji ko nahi bataaungi ye sab as already bahot problems hain unke uppar lekin Agar doobara bhaagne ki koshish ki toh main bilkul bataadungi sabko...

Main-Ek baat bataata hun mouka Hai abhi bataado doobara mouka nahi dunga main fir... Mera plan ek baar fail hua wahi bahot shock ki baat Hai 2 baar fail no way...

Kri-tum yahaan se nahi nikal shaktey... Tumne jyoti di ko dhoka diya...

Main-what the fuck... O hello I don't even know your jyoti di.. Dhoka Dena toh durr ki baat Hai or dhoka Ashish ne bhi nahi diya... A tumlog usko bulaalo naa idhar Hai kahaan bc woh idhar lawd....i mean idhar waatt lagi paddi Hai or woh gayab Hai usko bulaao usase pucho ki bhai ye sab sach nahi Hai humaara bhi picha chutte tumlog bhi tension free hojaao...

Kri-kal aajaaengi woh...

Main-gajab toh Kal sabke saamne usase puchlena...

Kri-nahi sabke saamne nahi Kal raat yahin par...

Main-lol.. Nahi aa paaunga...

Kri-kyun..?

Main-bahot kaam Hai Kal mereko...

Kri-matlab...?

Main-off course bhaagunga yaar or kya karuunga... Kal apun gayab...

Kri-kal 6 k 6 Dogs khulle rakhwaaungi...

Main-waise toh I love dogs but unko maarne mein mujhe koi problem nahi hogi...

Kri-eeewwww! Tum dogs ko maaroge...?

Main-joking.... 6 dogs hain toh Mera raatko nikalna impossible ab kuch Naya plan karnekaa Hai mereko... Bc kya lodu... I mean ghatiya jagah Hai...

Kri-oh hello aisi jagah pure haryana mein nahi millegi tumhe itani badi haweli dekhi hai kabhi...

Main-haao rojj dekhta hun...

Kri-kidhar sapno mein...

Main- Aji lawd....Abe gaali Dena bandh karbe...

Kri-what..?

Main-sorry thoda control nahi rehta ... Mera Matlab Tha I guess isase 5 gunna badi haweli toh hogi humaarimm..or isase 5 gunna jyaada area mein faili Hai..

Kri-You gotta be kidding me...

Main-yaar tum bilkul Bhi I mean thoda saa bhi I mean slight saa bhi nahi jaanti main kon hun kahaan se hun kya karta hun...

Kri-Actually nahi... I mean I know ki tum kissi powerful background se ho lekin jyaada nahi Pata...

Main-Haryana k cm, home minister wagairaah wagairaah ko toh jaanti hogi...

Kri-offocurse itani knowledge Hai mujhe and Haan don't tell me tum unko jaantey ho... Fainkana nahi...

Main-jaanta nahi banaaya he humne hai..

Kri-very funny...

Main-bhai theek kehtey hain bc kon bhains k aage been bajaae...

Kri-tumne mujhe bhains Bola what the hell...

Main-tereko nahi Bola re woh ek kahaawat Hai... Tu ek kaam Kar Google Kar Deva Singh yaa AP yaa Abeer yaa mangal etcetera etcetera uske baad baat kartey hain...

Kri-abtoh tumne meri curiosity or badha di ab Google karna he padega...

Main - kartey raho main chalta... Ciao...

Kri-oh hello idhar se kahaan balcony se jaao...

Main-woh raasta bandh hogaya yahaan se kon dekhega waise bhi... Bc ek baat Hai kya Mast room Hai humein toh chutiy... I mean bakwass saa room diela Hai...this is not fare Haan...

Kri-just get out...

Main-google Karo fir apne bhai dadaji yaa pitaji se pucho ki ye gentlemen kon hain tab Bolna get out... Tabtak k liye bye...

Ye bolke Maine gate khola or idhar udhar dekha koi nahi Tha toh aaram se nikalke uppar chadd gaya humaare room k saamne aaya knock karne he waala Tha ki Maine darwaaja thoda saa push Kiya or woh khull gaya bhenchod lawde ki planning hogi yahaan saala Gate khulla chhod rakha Hai bclog ne... Main andar aaya aaram se toh woh log khidki se niche dekh rahe they ki main kahaan gaya wagairaah - 2 Sab k Sab bc wahin jhumrakhe they...

Rohit-dikha kya be...?

Ravi-nahi re iss balcony mein se he dikhega bc Pata nahi kahaan marrgaya...pakka bhosdkaa yaa toh pakada gaya yaa fir line maarne lag gaya main likh k deta hun...

Main-aji Haan bhen k lawde kareena kapoor baithi hain udhar toh...

Ye sun woh log ekdum se palte...

Ravi-bhosdk darra diya...

Sam-ek minute tu andar kaise aaya be gandu...

Main-lehen k bawdo Gate takk lock naa Kiya tha tumlog ne bichmein koi aajata toh marrjaati na gand...

Sam-ye Ashish ko Bola Tha main...

Rohit-woh chhod ye Bata niche Kya hua....?

Main-jyaada kuch nahi ek chance milgaya woh boli abhi budhau ko nahi bataaegi lekin fir bakchodi ki toh pilwaadegi sabko...

Rohit-bc aise kya pataaya itani jaldi jo raaji hogayi...

Main-frankly speaking Maine kuch nahi kiya I mean thoda eye contact hua Tha but jyaada nahi toh ye sab usne khud k hissab se he Kiya... Yaa ye ho shakta Hai woh meri shakal par already fidda ho...

Sam-waah bc Mast Hai dikhne mein toh...

Main-Haan but bc apne type ki nahi Hai..

Rogit-tabhi sochun bc Bina flirt kiye kaise aagaya chutiya...

Main-haao flirt nikala he nahi mera it means apne type ki nahi Hai....apne type ki hoti toh Mera flirt uchall-2 k bahaar aajata... Even bc humein theek se jaanti bhi nahi....

Rohit-lol..

Main - bolke aaya main ki Google Kar maadarjaat Pata Kar inshaan Hai ki bhagwaan apun...

Ravi-maadarjaat toh nahi Bola hoga tu...

Main-of course nahi ladkiyon k saamne gaali naa deta main...

Ami-iska Matlab main kya hun...

Main-tu chill Kar tujhe aadhi gaali samjh nahi Aati toh koi dikkat nahi..

Rohit - woh chhod be ab aage kaa kya plan Hai...

Main-Firse bhaagta hun bc kutton ki maai chhod dunga..kholo khidki..

Continued...

UPdate-38(Do not Mess with Us)

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Main uss room se nikalke niche ki Taraf aaya Mera mood kharaab hogaya Tha what if main yahaan chutiyon ki tarah padda rahun or Bahaar koi problem aajae koi problem kya lagaalo John he attack kardey toh kya lawda ukhaad paaunga main bc.. Niche woh log garden mein they jahaan tent wagairaah lagrahe they shaadi ki taiyaariyaan suru hochuki thi or humaare waale lawde help karwaa rahe they...

Main-bhosdko tumhaare papa ki shaadi Hai kya jo lage paddey ho...

Rohit-time pass ho nahi raha thoda kaam he karletey hain kya Pata jaldi chhod dein...

Main-bhenchod...

OK AP OK first of all calm down gussa nahi karna naa beta naa gussa toh karna he nahi Hai nope... Aise Karega toh gand marrjaaegi...gussa nahi ssshshshshsh...

Main ek side aagaya or garden mein ek bench par baith gaya....As I said earlier Mera gussa bahot kharaab Hai yaa toh aata he nahi Hai or Aata Hai toh fir bahot gand maardeta hai... Meri bhi or saamne waalon ki bhi... Isliye main control Kar raha Tha yahaan baithke...

Main-fuckkkkkkkkk...

Main puri frustration se chilaaya jisase thoda gusse kaa weight Kam hua thoda mind fresh hua...

Main-Yes like that... Gajab hell yeah bud ab bakchodi nahi aaram se aaram se.. OK all good... Easy...

OK let's go now... Main waapis unlog k pass aaya Wajir bhi wahin Tha...

Main-Time kya hua re...?

Wajir-1:30 baje hain...

Main-wtf 1 Baje utha main... Gajab.

Rohit-humaara lunch ho chuka tu karle...

Main-naa bookh nahi Hai...

Wajir- kyun...?

Main-Kyun...? Bhook se puchun..? Ki kyun nahi Hai tu...? KYa jawaab degi woh maalum..? Ki a lawde meri marji nahi hun toh nahi hun...Teri gand mein kya panchayat Hai.....

Main wahaan idhar udhar ghumta raha bc sochraha Tha kutton k sath dosti Karlun par woh bhi nahi ho paaya because kuttey dikhe he nahi Maa k lawde keval raat raat ko kholtey ho kya... Isliye main room mein aagaya or jab thodi derr tak or wohlog nahi aaye toh main waapis unko lene niche ki taraf aaya lekin jaise he main first floor par aaya mujhe kuch awaajein aane lagi... Jaise koi Ladd raha ho Maine uppar se he niche dekha toh hall mein puri family ikathha thi.... Sab k Sab log they udhar... Jyoti or woh thakur k bich conversation chal rahi thi..

Jyoti-aap samjh kyun nahi rahe dadaji... Woh bahot khatarnaak Hai Maine dekha Hai wahaan isko he is a bloody beast.. Ye jo tumlog Surendra Surendra kartey rehtey they naa uske piche AP he Hai...

Ye sun woh sblog solid chownkey...

Jyoti-haan sahi suna koi aam ladka nahi Hai woh jisse aaplog uthaaloge woh kissi ko kahi chhodega... Wohlog pura haryana chalaatey hain haryana kya pura North India chalaatey hain police power paisa public Sab inka Hai... Log devta maangtey hain Inko... Aap pure pariwaar ko khatre mein daal rahe ho...

Thakur-ye Sab usko in Sab mein paddney se pehle sochna caahiye Tha...

Jyoti-insab mein paddney se pehle...

? Daji woh mereko jaanta bhi nahi Hai aaj pehli baar usne dekha mujhe... Or uske pass itana time nahi Hai ki woh aise harr matter mein ghussa firre even usse Pata bhi nahi Tha Ashish ne uska naam Liya hai...

Ye sun wohlog maano sapne se bahaar aae..

Thakur-Toh usne kaha kyun nahi...

Jyoti-kyunki Ashish uska dost Hai...

Wajir-Ab jo hogaya so hogaya kamjorr hum bhi nahi hain dekhlenge usko or uske baad uske Deva ko...

Ye sun Mera dimag jo already ghumma hua Tha or jyaada ghumma main boltey hue niche aaya...

Main-Deva bhai bol... Yaa deva ji bol...

Wajir-kya Bola...

Main bilkul uske saamne aake khadda hogaya...

Main-jo tu suna tere jaise chindi chorr Pata Hai humaare yahaan hath jodke sirr jhuka Kar aatey hain jis deva ko tu naam se bulaaraha Hai unki Pooja hoti Hai... Tu humein dekhega Haan itani goli padengi ki laash bhi pehchaan mein nahi aayegi... Bhagwaan kaa naam Bina respect k nahi letey..

Thakur-tum...

Main-bich mein nahi bolna chicha.... Ab tu sun kahaan Tha main Haan yaad aaya Kiske dum par uchhal raha Hai tu ek ko bhi nahi bakshunga jab tak shant hun toh shant hun warna fir Shaitan hun woh haal kardunga ki naa marrega naa jinda rahega...

Woh Sab log kuttey k maafik mujhe ghurr Kar dekh rahe they... Or tab mujhe realize hua ki bhosdk gussa nahi gussa nahi... YAAD rakha Kar gand Marr jaaegi...

Main-actually I am sorry... I didn't meant that...

Ye sun wohlog blank hogaye ki bhenchod aadmi Hai yaa paayjaama... Or main uppar ki taraf aagaya... Ami wagairaah Sab gate par khaddey ye sab sun rahe they woh bhi mere piche piche uppar aagaye.... Uppar room mein aatey he Main firse chilaayaa...

Main-"Fuck this Shit"...

Rohit - Kya hua re...?

Ami-gussa aaraha Hai usko... Or gussa usko karna Hai nahi... This is bad humein nikalna hoga yahaan se...

Sam-Matlab...

Ami-Matlab jitana ye gussa Karegi utana ye waapis past waala AP banegi.. Vertigo ye gift deke gayi hai isko...

Ravi-what the fuck...?

Ami-yep... Aise ye bimaar hojaaega fir.... And that is bad very very bad...

Main-Thodi Derr chup rahoge be bhosdko...

Ye bolke main utha...

Main-Ami k room mein jaaraha main tumlog bakchodi continue Karo...

Or main Ami waale room mein aagaya... bc ye log ko tapka bhi nahi shakta bechaare innocent Hain ek thakur k liye sabki gand maarna not good... Lekin Agar dimag ghumma toh Sab marrenge isliye dimag ghumaana nahi Hai bhenchod kya chutiya Tarah se kidnap huein hain kissi ko shakk takk naa hoga ki hum yahaan Hain even main bhi bahaar hota toh dhund nahi paata because koi link he nahi Hai naa koi saboot... Ab toh Parson shaadi Hai uske baad he nikalna hopaaega lagta Hai... Shaadi Hai iska Matlab guests bhi aaenge guests aaenge Matlab bheed hogi family Chutiyaapa hoga
Matlab jeena bahot mushqill hoga lekin mouka ho shakta Hai bhaagne kaa yaa koi mobile hath lagjaae... Woh aasaan hoga... Lekin bc abtak ek bhi mobile yaa land-line phone dikha takk nahi lagta Hai budhau ban kardiya Hai phones ko.. Main kuch soch he raha Tha ki darwaaja knock hua.. Or fir khulla as Maine lock nahi kiya Tha... UDHAR se woh Kritika andar aai... Kritika k thobdey ko dekh lag raha Tha ki usko Pata chal gaya hai main kon hun...

Kri-AP....

Main-not now baad mein...

Kri-Please listen...

Main-Listen girl now Is a very bad time I am telling you do not start..

Kri-My Uncle and Aunty wants to talk to you..

Ye sun Jyoti k mom and dad Yaani thakur Arjun singh or unki wife Archana andar enter hue... Main aksar loggon k thobdey padhleta hun lekin yahaan main confuse Tha because unke cehre par darr, Majburi or sadness k mixed expressions they... Unko dekh main khadda hua...

Main-Ji boliye...

Arjun-We want your help....

Main-I see I see... What kind of help can you please explain ....

Arjun-Please listen .. Mere papa ek bahot ache insaan hain... Gareeb or laachaar logon k maseeha Hain woh aaplog ki Tarah toh nahi but jitana Kar shaktey hain logon k liye utana kartey hain... Aajtak kissi ne bhi unpar ungali nahi uthaai Hai log bahot ijjat kartey hain unki... Lekin jaise he unhe ye sab kaa Pata challa unhone apni ghar ki ijjat k liye Bina kuch soche samjhe aap Sab ko kidnap karwaa Liya kyunki Jyoti ki shaadi pehle he tayy ho chuki thi Yahaan k ek bade gharaane mein bahot achaa khaandaan Hai unka or uss jaisa ladka humein nahi millega.. Isliye papa ye shaadi k bich mein kuch bhi nahi aane Dena caahtey they... Lekin Shor sharaabe k bich ye baat ladke waalon ko Pata chal gayi... Unhe double chinta sataaney lagi ek ki Jyoti kaa Sachmein affair Hai joki Tha nahi dusri or main problem tumhaare pareewar kaa naam bhi aagaya insabmein isliye woh log darr gaye or shaadi k liye mana karne lage par papaji ne unse baat ki woh papa ki kaafi ijjat kartey hain or unse darrtey bhi hain isliye unhone shaadi nahi todi or ye baat maanli ki Jyoti kaa affair nahi Tha lekin tumhaara darr toh unlog ko tabhi bhi satta he raha Tha aaplog kya ho sabko Pata Hai toh jaahir si baat Hai darr toh lagega he... Isliye unhone ek shart rakhi ki jab tak deva ji khud Yahaan aake unke saamne ye saaf nahi karenge ki humaara Insabse koi naata nahi Hai tabtak shaadi nahi hogi....

Main-what the hell...???

Archana - Ji Haan... Ab papa kissi k aage jukhenge nahi or deva bhai Bina jukhaae unki baat sunenge nahi kyunki already unhone aaplog ko kidnap karke galati ki hai... Or Aise ye shaadi hogi nahi or pure pareewar ki badnaami hogi woh alag..

Main-toh fir humein kyun kidnap karwaaya... Jab tumhe Pata he Tha affair Hai nahi...

Arjun-Woh shaadi naa hone Dene waali dhamki k Kaaran... Unhe laga jawaan khoon Hai kya Pata kya kardey...

Main-so let me get this straight tumlog bahot ache Inshaan ho OK good...jyoti is a very sweet girl I know... SHAADI horahi Hai good or sath sath shaadi nahi bhi horahi not good... Shaadi karaane k liye aap sabko Deva bhai ki permission caahiye good or dusri taraf tumlog deva bhai ki beijjati Kar rahe ho... Very bad...

Ab ladke waale bhi tumlog se darrtey hain toh shaadi cancel woh karenge nahi lekin good humlog se bahot jyaada darrtey hain toh shaadi woh Bina shart puri hue karenge nahi...what the fuck this is so confusing....

Continued....

Update-39(Ok Let's Go)

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Arjun-Ji Haan bilkul sahi samjhe aap...

Are lawda samjha main confusiya gaya hun bhosdk....

Main-or aapko ye lagta Hai ki deva bhai yahaan aaenge or fir maafi maangenge... What the hell... Halwa Hai kya tumlog ko baksh dein wahi bahot Hai waise hota hua woh bhi naa dikh raha mereko...

Arjun-isiliye aapke pass aae hain... We need your help...

Main-and why i should help you? .. .. After all You guys kidnapped me...

Arjun-Because we know you... You help people in need always and we need you more then anyone now... Ek kidnapper nahi ek laachaar Baap banke aaya hun... Meri beti ki jindagi kaa sawaal Hai... Agar ye shaadi nahi Hui toh pure area mein beijjati hogi woh alag... Baaki force main aapko Kar nahi shakta... Hath jodke vinatti he Kar shakta hun please save us...

Ye bolke woh wahaan se chala gaya... Or turant uske jaatey he uski wife mere pair pakadne lagi ye dekh main chownka or jump maarke bed par Chadd gaya...

Main - No no no please don't do that... Dont ever do that..

Archana-please humaari madad kijiye Agar ye shaadi nahi Hui toh thakur khandaan ki ijjat mitti mein mill jaaegi or Agar aisa hua toh papa toh yun he shadme mein challe jaaenge.. Please madad kijiye humaari...

Main-ok OK please durr hoiye ek baar...

Woh thoda piche hatti toh main bed se niche uttara...

Main-ok main aapki help karunga...

Archana - pakka naa...?

Main-Boldiya Matlab hojaaega meri baat pathar ki lakeer hai....

Archana-bahot bahot dhanywaad...

Main-ok here is the deal mujhe karna ye Hai ki deva bhai ko manaana Hai jo ki easy Hai lekin sath sath bahot tuff bhi... Unko yahaan leke aana Hai or tumhaare ladke waalon se baat karwaani Hai is that right...?

Archana-Haan... Par ek problem Hai phone wagairaah hum use kar nahi shaktey as papa ko Pata chal jaaega..

Main-Phone se baat banegi bhi nahi phone par samjhaaunga toh woh kuch naa samjhney waale ulta yahaan aake bakheda khadda kardenge... face to face samjhaana padega...

Archana - toh aapko yahaan se bhaagna padega...

Main-arey abtoh help k liye jaaraha hun abhi bhi bhaagna he padega Matlab.....

Archana-Agar Papa ko Pata chal gaya toh woh kabhi nahi jaane denge aapko... Isliye aapko bhaagna he padega...

Tumhaare papa ki Maa kaa bhosdaaaa...bhenchod budhaau seedha-2 boldey help caahiye gand mein ghussalega ego ko...

Main-ok toh ek kaam karna aaj raatko kuttey bandhwaadena baaki main dekhlunga...

Arch-woh nahi ho shakta... Woh raatko khulle he rahenge...

Main-toh tumlog aae kya karne Hon yahaan par Bina help kaise nikalunga yaar thoda toh help Karo...

Arch-aapko subah mein nikalna padega Kal...

Main-gajab kya plan hai... Din k ujaale mein Sab guards k bich se nikalunga... MR. India samjha Hai kya...

Arch-Guards ki jimmedaari humaari... Pichli side se nikalna jahaan se pehle try Kiya tha... Kritika ne bataaya mujhe...

Main-shabbas...

Arch-Kal subah theek 5 baje tum piche ki wall se jaaoge dusri side khet (fields) hain kaafi unko cross karke tum gaon mein enter Hoge... Woh bhi gaon k bilkul outside jaise he khet khatam honge tumhe ek pakki sadak dikhegi jo gaon k bahaar se nikalti Hai ussi se Jaana woh tumhe seedha agle gaon mein chhodegi wahaan se tumhe ek or gaon cross karna Hai lekin wahaan humaare jyaada bandey nahi hain so aaram se karloge lekin iss gaon mein bahot bandey hain isliye be careful... Dusre gaon k addey par tumhe private bus millengi town k liye wahaan se tum apne ghar k liye nikal Jaana or please please Parson subah 11 baje takk aajaana... Shaadi kaa wahi time fix hua Hai...

Main-pehle risk leke haweli se bahaar nikalun fir tumhaare Bandon se bharre 2 gaon cross Karo... Gajab sounds like an amazing plan...

Arch-ab jo bhi Hai yahi Hai... Aap he humaari aakhiri aasha ho...

Main-ok OK karlunga main...

Arch-ye rakhiye...

Ye bolke usne kuch paise Orr ek Kagaj diya jispar ek mobile no. Likha Tha...

Arch-ye Mera no. Hai mujhe phone karke bataadena kya hua kya nahi...

Main-sure... Lekin subah Sab hoga kaise guards and all...

Archana-Papaji rojj subah 5 baje kutton ko ghumaane lejaatey hain sathmein jyaada tar guards bhi jaatey hain exercise k liye... Pichli side toh 2-4 guards he rehtey hain woh bhi gate par main din mein he wahaan ek lohe kaa drum rakhwaadungi jisase aaram se chadd paao aap uppar...

Main-cool... OK Deal done...

Arch-bahot bahot dhanywaad...

Main-aise Matt Karo yaar mujhse bade ho aap hath wagairaah Matt joddo please...

Thodi derr or emotional bakchodi Hui or fir woh chali gayi... Wahaan keval Kritika baaki rehgayi...

Kri-aap Sachmein humaari help karoge..

Main-Haan.. Or ek minute tum se seedha aap ye sab kaise hua...?

Kri-sorry Haan mujhe Sachmein aapke baare mein nahi Pata Tha but now I know everything...

Main - everything maane...?

Kri-ki aap bahot ache insaan ho or helpful bhi..

Main-Helpful yes bilkul hun main helpful but achaa no no no I am no good I am the baddest person you will ever meet in your life I guarantee you that.. Tum aajtak jiss bhi Bure se Bure ladke se milli ho unsabse saikdon gunna jyaada bura hun main I had done some really shitty work over the years some people hate me for that some people hate double me for that some people pitty me for that some people sympathize me for that some people love me for that but but but you see the point is they all are afraid of me they can't stand me they can't touch me they can't do anything about me I am what I am and I am bad very very bad..

Ye sunke woh confusiya gayi sath sath impress bhi Hui lawdo dialouge maara Hai woh bhi gand faad woh bhi itana lamba impress naa hogi kya bc...

Main-... Chalo Main sabko bataadeta ki kya scene Hai...

Kri-sure...

Uske baad main waapis humaare wale room mein aaya or unsabko puri Kahaani bataai toh as expected wohlog bhi confusiya gaye...

Rohit-Ek minute toh galati kiski Hai yahaan Ashish ki, Iss thakur family ki yaa ladke waalon ki...?

Ravi-Honestly speaking I guess kissi ki bhi nahi because Sabne jo Kiya ache k liye he Kiya ab koi family apne betey k liye Yun he ladki nahi chunn lenge unhe proofs toh caahiye he honge chalo unhone maanliya Jyoti kaa affair nahi Tha but humlog se toh fattegi he unki...

Sam-I agree...

Main-Toh jaldi vote Karo ab jaaun yaa nahi because main Haan bolke aagaya tumlog kahoge toh mana kardunga...

Rohit-Nahi I think we should help them...

Sam & Ravi - Yep...

Ashish - kahin naa kahin Anjaane mein he sahi galati meri bhi Hai toh I will be happy if you help them...

Ajit-yep from me...

Main-Shabbas toh nikalta hun fir...

Ravi-Rukk be Ami kaa vote rehgaya...

Main-uska vote dediya Main...

Ravi-lol...

Ami-Anything you like.... :D

Main-toh subah 5 baje time dekhtey rehna bc...

Ami-mere waale room mein watch Hai...

Main-cool toh Kal subah 5 baje apun yahaan se gayab... Woh hojaaega par bc aage bhai ko samjhaana impossible Hai uppar se saala jaanwar toh abtak gusse se paglaa gaya hoga gand mardega woh...

Ravi-Wahi karna jo humlog bhai ko manaane k liye bachpan se kartey aae hain...

Sam-Yo... EMOTIONAL...

Main-BLACKMAIL...

Ravi-Exactly...

Main-yahi karna padega let's see kitana kaam Karega...

Uske baad shyaam Hui humlog ne kuch nahi kiya room se bahaar he naa nikale as guests aane lag gaye they and we hate strangers greeting us so bahaar he naa gaye.. Raatko dinner humne niche Kiya or Bina kissi bakchodi k seedhe room mein aagaye... Or aatey he jaldi sogaye Ami ko humein subah jagaana Tha or usne waisa he Kiya theek 4:30 baje usne humein jagaaya bc aaj Pata chala kya gandugiri hoti hai subah jaldi uthne mein saala aankh bhi dhangse naa khulli 5 baar munh dhoya tab jaake thoda theek hua... Humne same wahi bedsheets ki rope banaai saara plan wahi Tha bus new Tha no dogs and less guards... + woh drum bhi aaj sahi jagah par Tha... Kaafi andherra Tha bc niche lights jall rahi thi as usual or thodi derr baad humein haweli ka main gate khulne ki awaaj aai or fir Kutton k bhonkney ki... Humne 10 minutes wait Kiya or fir bedsheets niche latkaa di and aaram se niche uttar gaya... Ab mujhe keval problem thi gate waale guards se unse main kaafi durr Tha but still Agar dekhliya toh bc chase karenge or main caahta hun ki unko Pata chale usase pehle main ye dono gaon cross Kar jaaun... Unko waise bhi Pata nahi chalne waala Agar abhi nahi dekha Toh mujhe bhaagtey hue because inke according toh humlog room mein he hain...

Main Ahista-2 Deewar k pass aagaya or fir aaju baaju dekh k Deewar ki taraf douda or fir Uss drum par se jump boost leke Deewar par latak gaya or fir uske uppar chadd gaya... Holy fuck that was exhausting... Haweli ki lights idhar bhi aarahi thi THODI BAHOT.... yahaan keval khet he dikha mujhe or unke bich mein ek kacha raasta jispar mujhe jaanekaa tha... Main dusri side latak k uttara... Lekin uttartey waqt kaafi awaaj Hui as niche koi kachre kaa polythene padda Tha or main uske uppar uttara.. Or iss awaaj se andar harkat Hui... Bhenchod lag gaye lawde ek mission theek se karne nahi detey....

Continued....

#1,466

Update-44(Bhai's Way)

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Baljeet-ji maine toh kuch nahi kiya...

Babhi-sabko pata hai aaplog ne kya kiya kya nahi kiya woh decide karna yaa uspar baat karna mera kaam nahi hai woh Mere husband sambhaalenge thodi derr mein aake woh unka kaam Hai... Mera kaam Hai yahaan jo humari misunderstandings thi unko clear karna...Ladke k Mom-dad kon hain...

Ispar ek aadmi saamne aake bola 45-46 ki age kaa hoga...

Aadmi-Ji main ladke kaa Pita hun Krishan Chaudhary... Or ye meri dharam patni Sujaata devi...

Babhi-toh meri baat aapse hai or ladki k maata pita se jo aap hain...

Arjun and Archana-ji...

Babhi-dekhiye first of all main clear kardun aapki beti k sath inmein se kissi kaa koi bhi relation naa toh hai naa he Tha or naa he hoga... Secondly humein iss Shaadi se koi bhi problem nahi hai or naa he hogi humaara kuch bhi nahi jaata isme balki bahot achi baat hai kissi beti ki Shaadi dhum dhaam se ho.. Isliye humari taraf se iss Shaadi ko Haan hai khussi khussi...

Krishan-ji bus yahi sunana tha humein hum chotey log befaltu mein nahi caahtey they ki humaara koi kaam aaplogon ko dikkat de... Isliye bus confirmation k liye aapko aana padda...

Babhi-ab koi maafi wagairaah bhi caahiye...

Krishan-kyun chotey loggon se majaak kartey ho madam ji... Aap se maafi mangwaake uppar waale ko kya munh dikhaaenge....

Babhi-Archana aapko kuch or sunana hai...? Koi sawaal...

Arjun-are nahi nahi nahi madam ji.. Humein toh koi pareshaani hai he nahi aap humaare yahaan aae bus Bhaag khulla gaye humaare...

Babhi- toh Shaadi pakki...??

Krishan-ji ji humari taraf se bilkul...

Archana - bus aap agar ladke or ladki ko ashirwaad dene takk rukkjaaein toh bahot aabhaari rahenge aapke...

Krishan - ji bahot sahi baat kahi...

Babhi-sure... Bus thoda jaldi karwaai ye....

Hum sablog bahaar aagaye dulhe ki car aagayi thi thakur and family sablog khuss hogaye they thakur awkward saa bana ghumraha tha or bhai ki entry baaki thi... Suna entry abhi baaki thi... Dulha mandap mein aaya pandit baitha hum sablog thoda piche khadey hogaye...

Ravi-babhi that was so cool...

Sam-seriously sabki fatt gayi thi...

Main-aakhir plan kiska tha...

Babhi-I hate show off but manana padega that shit was dope...

Abeer-lol...

Rasham wagairaah suru hogayi thi...

Bhabhi-Khaana kab khilaaenge yaar i am hungry AF...

Abeer-same...

Main-Inko bol naa re jaanwar ki ferrey baad mein karwaana pehle Khaana he lagwaado...

Babhi-lol..nahi re... Sharam karo...

Main-lambi chalegi ye Rasham toh...

Archana - ji aaiye aage aaiye aap he kaa ghar hai...

Babhi(aaram se) -humaare ghar mein jab caahe tab Khaana Khaaletey humlog...

Main-ahaha...

Sam-lol... Nice...

Humlog mandap k bilkul pass mein aagaye bc aage piche mehmaan log khadey they isliye hum dusari side jaake khadey hogaye jahaan log naa they...

Ladki ko bula liya gaya kritika jaake leke aai usko.. Bc kya mast lagreli thi woh... Kritika nahi be jyoti... Kritika toh Bola naa apne type ki hai he nahi...

Usko ladke k bagal mein baithayaa gaya.. Tabhi main gate se 3 gaadiyaan aai or gaadiyaan dekhtey he humlog lage chuppne...

Main-ye aaye bade bhaisahaab...

Babhi-sambhaal liyo bus tu...

Ab bheed fir lagi udhar dekhne even pandit bhi rukk gaya bhosdk ferre karwaa jaldi se...

Sabse pehle deva bhai uttare ab mehmaan log jo humein nahi jaantey they woh deva bhai ko toh jaantey he they isliye unke munh khulle k khulle rehgaye ki bc kya vip Shaadi Hai.. Bhai k alaawa Mangal, Rishi, Anjali, Rajat, Gupta ji, Jiya, Pooja, Deepak and Ajay uttare... Mandap waale log uthey ab thakur or uss mla ki gand fatti ki bhenchod ye kya hua...

Tabtak wohlog mandap ki taraf badhe... Or bilkul humaare bagal mein aake rukke...

Deva-are baitho baitho sab pehle Shaadi niptaao baaki main baad mein niptaata hun... Pandit ji suru kijiye...

Mla-bhai..

Deva-chup chaap baith be bola naa Shaadi hone de fir baat karenge...

Main-chalo chalo continue continue...

Sablog ko nervousness ne Gherra but pandit ne chaalu kiye mantar...

Piche se anjali ne mereko punch diya...

Main-offff. ... Ahem ahem... Wassup darling...

Anjali--AP the great kidnapped... Gajab...

Main - AP the great Escaped... Orr bhi gajab...

Anjali-AP the great helping his kidnappers... Orr bhi gajab...

Main-AP the great helping some good peoples... This one is the best... Waise you guyss failed... Mujhe dhund naa shake...

Anjali - dude you don't have any idea humlog ne kya kya kiya hai kahaan kahaan gaye hain kiss kiss ko uthaaya Hai...

Main-I know I know I can understand...

Anjali-Thakkk gayi yaar...

Main-chall kopche mein teri thakan dur karta hun...

Anjali-shut up... Sapne naa le din mein...

Main-as you wish...

Anjali-my wish is my wish none of your wish... Lol..

Main-lol...

Anjali-waise sab theek toh hona...

Main-Haan bus kal bhaagte time junk food khaaya kabhi bhi ulti aa shakti aisa lagraha hai...

Mangal-ek punch mein breakfast lunch dinner sab nikaal dun...

Main-Wassup chutiye...

Mangal-lawde.. Teri gand fodd dunga...

Anjali-language Mangal...

Mangal-sorry... Sun L...de.. Teri G fodd dunga...

Main-lol...

Anjali-lul..

Deva-ssshhh... Saamne Shaadi horahi hai re chup karo...

Main-Wassup bro...

Deva-all good all good...

Main-see media shouldn't know this story...

Deva-ok OK...

Main-thakur family media ko bataaegi nahi naa he ladke waale bataaenge bacha ye mla...

Deva-dekhlenge isko bhi...

Ferrey suru hue humein fool diye gaye unke uppar fainkne k liye... Maine mere waale Pooja OR jyoti par faink k maare jo bilkul he khogayi thi Shaadi mein... Jaise meri he Shaadi Hai.

Pooja-what the fuck...

Jyoti-you just scared the shit out of us...

Main-Wassup..

Jyoti - matt puch yaar darra diya tha tumlog ne...

Main-I know I know sorry yaar...

Jyoti-Jaan bujh m kidnap hua tha kya...?

Main-Lol nahi...

Jyoti-toh sorry kyun bol raha hai...

Ferrey khatam hue or Shaadi sammpann hui unlog ne Maa Baap and then bhai babhi se ashirwaad liye and then photos wagairaah or khaane kaa time hua...

Deva-hogayi Shaadi samppann...?

Main-yep... Have your fun now... Lekin in a gentle way..

Deva-ok let's do it...

Ab wahaan keval thakur and family or ladke waale he they dulha and dulhan thoda side mein apne stage par baithey they photo session jaari tha... Mehmaan log photos khinchwaarahe they...

Deva-Haan ji toh kahaan se suru karwaana passand karoge tumlog... Main toh keh...

Thakur-Deva Ji dekhiye...

Deva-dekhna dikhaana baad mein doobara meri baat bichmein kaati toh ye thakur giri yahin nikaal dunga meri baat suno.. Mujhe maalum Hai kya hua tha kyun hua tha kab hua tha kaise hua tha wagairaah wagairaah isliye tum mein se kissi ko safaai dene ki jarurat hai nahi mera mood abhi theek hai isliye bichmein bolke usse kharaab karna nahi.. Sunlo bus chup chaap itana kaafi hai jo puchun uska jawaab do.. First of all iss baat ki main jadd hai ye MLA baljeet Singh iska ilaaj hogaya hai lagaalo bus thode din mein iski aukaat k anusaar isko fall mill jaega..

Baljeet-b. B. B. Hai...

Woh aage kuch bolta usase pehle Mangal ne uske munh mein gun thusss di... Ye dekh un sabki gand fatt ke hath mein aagayi... Wohlog ek ek kadam piche ko hattey..

Deva-are bhai ek baar Bola naa chup raho kyun befaltu dimag ki dahi kar rahe ho ache khasse chupchaap samjhaa raha hun tum samjh naa bhai... Ab jabardasti karta acha lagunga kya pure pareewar k saamne... Hata re mangal... Tu nikal le side mein Tera hogaya tere sath baat karke main khudki beijjati naa karwaana caahta Abe Tumhaari party kaa leader haina jo tera maalik woh daily mere manager k pass 25 phone karta hai uske saamne hath jodta hai ki ek baar deva bhai se baat karwaa do toh teri kya aukaat hai mere saamne soch tu mere khilaaf planning Karega jaanta haina mujhe tu.... maine elections Jeettey he Speech mein loud and clear kahaa tha ki opposition ko kuch karna hai toh mereko karo meri family ki taraf dekha toh politics he nahi ye desh bhi chhudwaa dunga uska.. Tere jaise 800 mlas sunraha hai 800 mlas jinmein se 90% kaa rootbaa terese 50 gunna jyaada uncha hai woh sab k sab mere liye kaam kartey hain samjha... Teri aukaat kya hai be jo tu Teri baat mere saamne rakhega... Side nikal jaa warna yahin thokdunga...

Mla k maathe par paseena aagaya tha munh lawde jaise khulla rehgaya bechaare kaa plan kya tha or kya hogaya woh ek taraf ko hatt gaya... Thakur kaa scene bhi khatam tha uski thakur giri bahot niche thi deva bhai k saamne..

Thakur bahot saare hain duniya mein bahot saare but Deva bhai ek he hain or ek he rahenge...

Continued...

Update-45(Done)

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Deva-Ab baat kartey hain tumlog ki tum jaantey ho main kon hun..?

Ispar sab chup rahe...

Deva-are bolo..

Unlog ne mundi Haan mein hilaai..

Deva-toh fir kya sochke inlog ko hath lagaaya kya socha tha Deva toh sareef aadmi hai politics mein Hai samjhaaenge toh samjhjaaega...yaad rakhna "" "Meri Adaalat mein Vakaalat nahi hoti or Saja hojaae toh jamaanat nahi hoti.. ""

Main-oh my goodness that dialogue was fire.... Holy hell...

Deva- aise nahi chalta Thakur Sahaab bilkul bhi nahi Saare duniya k kand karke yahaan aaya hun main.. India ko sudhaarne k liye main khud badla hun loggon ki madad karne k liye yahaan aaya hun agar tum mere pass aatey ye baat leke toh main wahin k wahin matter suljhaadeta mere bhai hain toh kya hua galati karne par maar inhe bhi padti hai... Par tumlog seedha action le liye main caahta toh Abtak toh khel khatam tha tumlog kaa lekin ye Sanki ne mana kiya mujhe ki ache log hain or belive me ye bahot he kam loggon ko bachaata hai because he is more good then he is bad...

Main-time please... Baat bich mein nahi kaati OK puri hogayi thi... Ab suno hogaya ye log ko galati kaa ehsash hogaya doobara nahi karenge... Chalo jaldi nikaltey hain fir...

Deva-shutup... So that being said ek chance deta hun tumlog ko warna "No one hurts my family and lives".. Lekin ab galati kari hai toh bhugtaan toh karna padega... Haina...?

Thakur-j. Ji... Ji...

Krishan-aap jo kahoge wahi hoga Bhai...

Deva-Dahej mein kitani jameen di hai thakur sahaab...

Thakur-W. W. W.. Wo. Oh...wajir ko pata hai..

Deva-juth Matt bolna mujhe pata chal he Jaana Hai...

Wajir-Ji 250 Acre.... Aap sab rakhlo...

Abeer-oye thappad maarunga toh yahin hugg dega tumhaari saari jitani jameen haina utani bhai daan dechuke hain tum humein jameen doge...

Deva-chupre... Suno 250 k 250 acre dono gaon k gareeb pareewaron mein baraabar baantdo...125 iss gaon mein or 125 Dulhe waale gaon mein..

Krishan - ji ji humein nahi caahiye kuch sab dedenge aap maafi dedijiye bus...

Deva-ye karo maafi miljaaegi...humlog chaltey hain... Or dhyaan rahe ek he galati maaf karta hun main... Goodbye Sorry for the inconvenience... Let's go...

Arjun-deva ji sabse pehle bahot - 2 dhanywaad hum ye ehsaan kabhi nahi bhullenge aapka aapki wajah se meri beti kaa gharr bass jaaega....

Deva-dhanywaad uske liye Matt karo meri wajah se agar kissi beti kaa gharr basse woh mere liye garv ki baat hai...

Main-(aaram se) aaya politician aaya...

Deva-agar dhanywaad Dena he hai toh iske liye do ki tum sabko chhod diya... Warna koi bachtaa hai nahi aise...

Main-(Aaram se) aaya aaya bhai aaya..

Arjun-Ji uske liye hum jitana dhanywaad dein utana kam hai bahot suna tha aapke baare mein aaj sab clear hogaya... Hum khuss naseeb hain jo aap yahaan aaye lekin agar yun bina Khaana khaae chale jaayenge toh humaare liye Sharam ki baat hogi...

Deva-dekhiye main parties wagairaah kaa Khaana khaata hun nahi but Haan ye log Khaalenge...

Main-bilkul bilkul...

Arjun-vinay bahaar Khaana lagwaado jaldi sabka...

Vinay - Ji...

Ye bolke woh bahaar chala gaya...

Arjun-Ji aaiye Khaana lagwaadiya hai...

Ye sun hum log uske piche piche chal paddey...

Archana-AP please aap 2 minute rukiye...

Main-bookh lagi hai aunty...

Babhi-2 minute rukkjaa Marr nahi jaaega...

Main-ok.. Aaplog chalo...

Woh sablog nikal gaye ab wahaan keval main thakur archana kritika thakur k dusre betey and unki family bachi thi...

Archana-Bahot bahot dhanywaad...

Main-isiliye main nahi rukk raha tha i hate this emotional shit... Ek baar thanks bola woh kaafi hai...

Ye sunn thakur ne mere kandhe par hath rakha uski aankhein namm thi...

Main-kyun chicha pata chal gaya kon hun main..

Ispar woh Hans diya...

Main-Jokes apart sorry maine aaplog se rudely baat ki...

Thakur-sorry toh mujhe kehna caahiye tumhe...

Main-tumhaare sorry k liye he rukka tha chicha...

Thakur-ek baat loud and clear boldun main jo aaj tumne humaare liye kiya hai woh koi Anjaan Aadmi kissi k liye nahi kar shakta...

Main-I am great... Am I?

Thakur-Indeed you are... waise tumhe humari jarurat padegi nahi lekin fir bhi humaare laayak koi bhi kaam chhota yaa bada ho toh beshak bata dena...

Main-uski jarurat nahi padegi fir bhi thanks... It was nice staying here... Loved this place loved you guyss... Or Haan chicha aage se sab kaam soch samjh k karna thakur giri se uppar parivaar hota hai...

Thakur-ye lesson sikha chuke tum mujhe already...

Main-ab aaiye sab Khaana khilwaatey aapko bhi...

Ye bol main un sabko sath leke bahaar ko aagaya bahaar ek side ko tent mein 3-4 tables ko join karke ek bada saa dining table banaaya tha or uske agal bagal kaafi kursiyaan lagi thi jinpar deva bhai and all baithey they... Main sam or Ravi bhai or babhi k bichmein chairs par baithey...

Main-baithiye baithiye thakur family baitho.. Akele thodi Khaaenge humlog...

Woh sablog bhi humaare sath baith gaye...

Main-I am hungry Af.. Waiter bhai jaldi lagwaa do..

Deva-media kaa kya karna hai....

Thakur-Ji idhar se humaare alaawa baaki kissi ko nahi pata kuch or humlog kissi ko bataaeNge nahi...

Main-Abhi kaa kya scene tha koi FIR wagairaah karwaai thi tumlog ne yaa koi statement diya tha ki humlog gayab hain...

Anjali-nahi but media waalon k sources tagdey hain Unlog ne guesses karna suru kardiya tha ki tum ho kahaan kya kidnap hogaye wagairaah wagairaah...

Main-toh kartey ye hain ki boldetey hain humlog yahaan aae they thakur chicha k invitation par Shaadi attend karne or attend karke nikal liye..

Deva-Ashish or Ajit k papa ko kya kahega... Wohlog bhi pareshaan hain bechaare...

Main-aap boldena koi personal matter tha misunderstandings hui or galati se ye sab hogaya baat bataane ki jarurat he nahi hain.... Aap bologe toh jyaada details naa puchenge.

..

Deva-ok... Jaldi khaao Khaana fir nikalana bhi hai.. Waise Idhar kaam wagairaah theek hua haina...

Krishan-Ji bilkul kaam jorron par hai saari galliyaan pakki hain government school and hospital kaa renovation hogaya animal hospital bhi khulgaya kull millake ekdum tejji se vikash horaha hai...

Deva-or fir bhi harwaadiye tumlog idhar se humein..socho humaara mla hota toh kitana kaam hota... Agli baar jitwaana...

Krishan-agli baar takk toh aap pm k liye nikal jaaoge..

Deva-are nahi nahi usme time hai abhi woh chalane do abhi dusron ko pehle North India sudhaartey fir whole India... Sabse jyaada kachara idhar he hai...

Aise he bakchodi mein Khaana hogaya humlog ne unse vidaa li or nikal gaye wahaan se... Or nikaltey he mujhe uss tau ki yaad aai jisne mujhe invitation diya tha bus mein jo Milla tha Mahesh naam tha uska yep uske yahaan bhi jaake aatey hain... Teesra gaon hai uska... Rr mein ab main bhai abeer Sam or Babhi they... Baaki alag alag cars mein...

Main-Abe jaanwar woh jo third gaon haina ussme rukkna hai...

Deva-udhar kya karega ab...

Main-aapko apne party k ek kattar supporter se milwaana hai uski beti ki Shaadi bhi hai aaj or mujhe invitation diya hai...

Maine unko bataaya fir ki kya scene tha...

Deva-It always feel nice to meet a genuine supporter lets go...

Humlog uske gaon mein pohanchey uska address pucha log baag chownk gaye itani gaadiya dekh kar... Uske baapu kaa naam mereko maalum tha nahi lekin fir bhi unke ghar Shaadi Hai aaj bolne par woh samjh gaye kiss Mahesh ki baat Kar rahe hain unhone humein uska address diya... Jo pass mein he Tha wahaan pohanche toh aage galli thodi patli thi toh cars humne piche he rokk di uske alaawa wahaan 4-5 normal cars bhi khaddi thi Maruti 800 alto type.. Uss galli mein 3rd makaan Mahesh kaa tha jo chota saa tha pakka... lower class se belong karta tha Mahesh thodi si jameen thi ussi se gujaara hota tha... Uss ghar k just side mein ek khaali plot tha jisme tent laga tha Khaana wagairaah chal raha tha... Humlog ko kuch gaon waalon ne humlog ko kya bhai ko kuch gaon waalon ne pehchaan liya or woh namaste namaste kartey hue sath holiye wohlog shock mein they ki jiss gaon mein aajtak mla naa aaya usme khud Deva bhai aae hain... uss plot k main gate par Mahesh khadda tha mehmaano k sawaagat k liye uske side mein uska bete they shayad ek 23-24 age kaa dusra 20-21 kaa jaisa Mahesh ne bataaya Tha....

Continued...

Update-47(No its not Him)
​

Or iske turant baad he channel bandh hogaya...

Main-holy fucking shit...

Anjali-Did you just see that...

Main-yes i did... Listen send someone to pick us up fast... Or Pooja ko bolo sab details nikaale kon kahaan Hai kisne kya kiya hai or sab details leke haweli pohancho..

Ye khabar sun ashish and ajit gabhra gaye as jin 3 kaa uss aadmi ne naam liya tha Usmein se ek Raju kaa bhai surjit tha yaani Ajit kaa cacha...

Maine phone cut kiya tabhi Deva bhai kaa call aagaya...

Main-laga hun kaam par haweli pohancho jaldi...

Deva-ok...

Call disconnected...

Main-tension naa le Ajit I got this.... Tumlog ghar pohancho...

Tabhi Nicki mam kaa call aaya mujhe...

Nicki-what the hell was that.. Usne tumhaara naam kyun liya.

Main-simple attention paane k liye abhi current mein sabse hot topic kya hai haryana mein AP and abeer usne ussi ko use Kiya taaki attention Mille nothing serious... Gotta go ttul...

Call disconnected...

Tabhi bahaar Jiya aagayi Anjali ki car leke...

Main-aao be Police Assistants..

Main rohit ravi or sam car mein baithey...

Jiya-what the fuck was that...?

Main-no idea...

Ravi-Red John aagaya bc...

Main-chutiya hai kya be ye jhantu kahaan se red John laga tujhe...

Rohit-ye John nahi hai...?

Main-off course nahi hai what the fuck John is legendary killer or ye koi nosikhiya John aise chutiyaape nahi karta kabhi tv and all... Baaki reason haweli mein bataaUnga...

Humlog haweli pohanche and seedha garrage mein aaye.... HUMAARE piche piche Abeer mangal aagaye and then Bhai or Rishi aaye.. Kuch derr baad Anjali and Team bhi aagayi....

Main-so first of all this is an state emergency secondly main bataadun ki Ye John nahi hai bilkul bhi nahi... Kai reasons hain no. 1) Iske sareer se ye john ki age kaa nahi lagta... 2) John kabhi attention k liye kuch nahi karta woh pehle karta hai fir usse attention milti hai.. 3) iske bolne se or bodylanguage se saaf dikh raha tha ki ye noshikiya hai... 4) isne jo gun lee thi woh local thi agar koi Bada criminal hota yaa Red John gang kaa koi hota toh ye sab nahi karta isliye ye keval ek behrupiya hai...

Anjali-lekin kyun abhi he kyun yun achanak...?

Main - Abhi kaa toh pata nahi but i think motive ye hai ki Loggon ko maalum Hai John aachuka hai toh ye John ko impress karne ki tarkeeb bhi ho shakti hai kissi Phsyco ki yaa uska ye mindset bhi ho shakta Hai ki agar John itana sab karke khulla ghumraha hai toh koi bhi ye sab karke bach shakta Hai... But beshak woh noshikiya ho yaa John naa ho but he is serious about it woh kuch bhi karega apna waada pura karne k liye he is coming for them... And usne humein challenge kiya hai and we have to stop him...

Deva-but what is the plan you know politics bahot garam hone waali hai...

Main-hogi he woh toh aap politics sambhaalo plan mere pass hai...

Anjali-what is the plan...?

Main-woh baad mein pehle Pooja mujhe details do ye 3 log kon kon hain or kya kand Kiya hai inhone or kya Tumhaari channel waalon se baat hui kaise hua hack unka system...

Pooja-Haan boss average channel hai security wall kamjor thi toh easily bina tracking k unka system hack karliya gaya or jabtak channel chala uski location badalti rahi isliye trace nahi kar paaye... Rahi baat in 3 ki toh 3no ne bade kand kiye hain kaale log hain.. No. 1 NITIN ye ek lawyer hai corrupted AF paise leke criminals ko bhi innocent banaadeta hai ye..

Abhi recently isne 4 aadmiyon ko chhudwaaya jinpar 3 maasoom ladkiyon kaa rape and murder karne kaa aaropp tha according to people woh 4on culprit they but he saved them court mein prove kardiya isne...

Main-ok this is fucked up...

Pooja-no. 2 Lakshay Ye ek business man hai medicine kaa business hai iska Millionaire hai ye... Apni he city kaa hai ye recently ispar case hua tha iski medicine ki quality ko leke according to reports isne Jaan bujh k sasti dawaaiyaan banaai jiski wajah se 25 gareeb bache aaj seriously ill hain and not sure kitane fully recover ho paaenge usase handycap hona pakka hai sabka...

Anjali-I knew about him isse arrest kiya tha Jiya ne...

Jiya-par again prove naa hua kuch...

Pooja-No. 3 Surjit Singh...

Main-we know him Raju kaa chota bhai hai ye... Usne kya kiya but...?

Pooja-Isne abhi THode din pehle apni city k outside kaafi jameen khareedi thi jahaan 12 gareeb pariwar rehtey they so basically isne unhe beghar kardiya and they are in serious Trouble right now..

Main-first things first baaki baad mein I know they deserve a punishment but not like this bhai first of all un 25 bachon ko badhiya hospital mein turant shift karwaya jaae...

Deva-hogaya samjh...

Main-secondly un beghar pariwaaron ki madad ki jaae...

Deva-ye toh already ho huki hai unhe temporary shelter provide karwaa diya tha agle din he..

Main-finally jab hum iss aadmi ko pakad lenge yaa udaa denge uske baad mujhe 3 cbi teams caahiye in teeno k liye har ek k liye alag or inke har kand ki jaanch ho or prove hotey he saja ho unko...

Deva-sure...

Main-so now all said and done here is the real deal 3 bandey hain uske raddar par inmein se ek ko lega, toh humein karna ye hai ki agle 48 hours takk as unke bodyguards rehna hai...

Deva-matlab..

Main-matlab ye ki humlog 13 hain 3 teams mein divide honge or unko protect karenge agle 48 hours takk or jaise he uski time line end hogi uske piche lagenge kyunki abhi hum unki life risk nahi kar shaktey...

Anjali-basically what you are saying is hum unhe protect karein agle 48 hours takk..

Main-, exactly like a bodyguard 48 k 48 ghante unpar najar rakhna So here is the deal Main, Ravi, Ami and Abeer Lakshay k yahaan jaaenge Anjali Rajat Sam Pooja and Deepak Surjit k yahaan Mangal, Rohit, Jiya, Rishi, and Ajay Nitin k yahaan... Get to work guyss next 48 hours humein kuch bhi karke unko bachaana hai jaldi se apni - 2 location par pohancho per team ek banda tum sabka samaan wagairaah le aaega baaki sablog nikalo Asaap...no way woh humlog ko beat karke un takk pohanchjaaega isliye be cool stay alert agar wohlog Tumhaari baat naa maane toh force karo arrest karo yaa deva bhai se baat karwaaOo unki....

Sab-ok boss...

Wohlog turant wahaan se nikal gaye ab wahaan keval Meri team yaani MAIN, Ami, abeer and Ravi rehgaye...

Main-bhai aapko loggon ko sambhaalna hai opposition waale ab aaenge loggon mein darr nahi failna caahiye bus that's it...

Deva-i got this tumlog ye dekho bus...

Main-don't worry...

Humlog ne jaldi se samaan daal liya as Hum sab haweli se he nikalne waale they or 4on haweli waale he they... humlog RR mein jaise he baithey mere pass calll aaya main pick kiya toh saamne se raju ki awaaj aai...

Raju-AP what is all this..

Main-don't worry we got this...

Raju-mere bhai kaa naam hai usme AP don't tell me to not to worry...

Main-I know I know isiliye bolraha hun..

Raju-I want your help..

Main - tere bina maange he kardi hai help... Anjali and team wahaan pohanchrahi hai...

Raju-no no i want you here...

Main - Abe Anjali is smarter then me uppar se police waali hai yahi kaam Hai uska...

Raju-nahi..

Main-toh mangal ko bhejun team k sath...

Raju-nahi I want you here...

Main - Abe chutiye already teams decided hain or pohanchney bhi waali hain chup chaap baith...

Raju-AP bhulo Matt tum last time mere pass aae they permission k liye mere area mein aane ki maine bina koi sawaal jawaab kiye Tumhaari madad ki thi... Ab tum piche nahi hatt shaktey...

Main-Abe...

Raju-mujhe kuch nahi sunana i want you here no one else...

Main-ok ok aata hun...

Call disconnected...

Main - (chillaake) FUCKKKKKK.....

Gussa nahi lawde gussa nahi....

Abeer-kya hua...?

Main-Raju caahta hai ki main uske gharr jaaun emotional blackmail kar raha lawda Jaana padega...

Abeer-toh dikkat kya hai change karletey place...

Main-dikkat lawde Riya hai woh Riya kaa ghar hai uske yahaan 2 din lawde kaise nikaalunga main bhenchod...

Abeer-fuck bhool gaya tha...

Main-lawda Mera... khaaya peeya yaad naa rehta tujhe gandu insaan...

Abeer-toh ek kaam Kar main jaata hun Tu Anjali ki team k sath chala jaaiyo...

Main-yahi toh problem hai uss bhen k lawde ko AP he caahiye kya lawda chussega mera pata nahi gandu kahin kaa...

Abeer-pehle toh gussa bandh kar ahista-2 sans le...

Main-lawde k baal gussa nahi hai frustration hai...

Ami-and your frustration always leads to Anger...

Main - shut up...

Ami-sorry...

Abeer-toh ab...

Main-ab lawda Mera chal Raju k yahaan...

Bhenchod life k lawde he lage paddey hain harr taraf ab Riya k yahaan Jaana padega kaise rahunga wahaan bc gandu life bhenchod...

Continued....
​

Update-48(New Location)

​

Basically I don't care about riya that's the truth but working k time bakchodi nahi caahiye mujhe isliye pehle he main durr jaaraha tha but leave it jo hai so hai thodi frustration seh lenge... Humlog Raju k yahaan pohanchey car park ki and Andar aae... Andar hall mein Anjali and team + Raju, Surjit, Riya, Ashish Ajit, Ramu and ek 22-23 ki Mast si ladki khaddi thi bc aajkal new ladkiyaan bahot milne lagi hain... Gajab...

Ashish kaa scene bataadun pehle toh main ashish k papa Ashok yahaan opposition party k ek respected neta hain or apne area se Mla hain pichle 11 saal se unka area yahaan se durr padta hai or wahaan itane bade and reputed school yaa colleges nahi hain isliye usne Ashish ko Raju k yahan chhoda hai school time se he Raju or Ashish k khandaan ki kaafi puraani yaari hai like 50+ saal puraani isliye ye yahin rehta hai taaki college k liye koi dikkat naa ho...

Back to present...

Anjali humein wahaan dekhtey he chownkgayi...

Anjali-AP tumlog yahaan everything all
right...?

Raju-ji maine bulaaya hai unko...

Main-wanna switch places...?

Anjali-yeah sure why not... No problem at all..

Main-aajao bahaar takk chhod deta tumlog ko...

Anjali-So sweet of you...

Hum sab bahaar aae...

Anjali-kya hua..?

Main-that fucking Raju yaar...

Maine unko bataaya ki kya hua...

Pooja-Basically that's fucked up...

Main-oh come-on Pooja it's my life it is always fucked up...

Sam-true that...

Main-see I don't care now you all know past is past for me but I don't want this awkward shit going on while I am trying to do my job here it pisses me off...

Anjali-yeah yeah I can understand but work is work we gotta do the job...

Main-isiliye toh aagaya warna lawda iss Raju k liye aata main...

Anjali-best of luck dude so we gonna take your place you guys have fun stay safe...

Main-you too... Mujhe phone karke update detey rehna...

Anjali-sure...

Wohlog nikal gaye or humlog waapis andar ki taraf aae..

Main-abeer tu lead kar i will take a pass on this one...

Abeer-naa i hate it...

Main-then Ravi tu kar..

Ravi-lawda karun.... main lead nahi karta bc kabhi cricket team ki captainship naa leta main baat karta hai... Ami ko boll..

Ami-I love it i can lead...

Main-yeah sure... Tu lead karegi toh hum nikaltey fir..

Ami-bahot ache karungi main...

Main-bahot ache se karungi main ye hota hai ganwaar...still i dont care tu kar we are chilling...

Humlog ne Ami ko aage aane diya or hum uss hall mein aagaye...

Raju-toh AP kya kiya jaae...

Main-talk to her she's the leader of our team... Let me introduce her she is Ami the best in the business of everything that involves violence... And she is my good friend.. Aage woh sab samjhaa degi...

Ami-so let's start, my Hindi is little bad but still tum sab samjhjaaega... So first of all Kitane members hain total yahaan...

Raju-inside toh keval Main, Surjit, Riya, Ajit, Ashish, Sneha Orr Ramu he hain or sathmein 2 noukar hain ... Bahaar guards and humaare bandey wagairaah hain...

New laundiyaa kaa naam Sneha hai matlab.. Gajab baat ye thi maine abtak riya ki taraf dekha bhi nahi tha aise he 48 hours nikalne they...

Ami-cool... So Mr. SURJIT first of all aapko kahin nahi Jaana Hai agle 48 hours takk this is the protocol yun samjo hum aapke bodyguard hain and trust me we are very good at it so aapko kuch nahi hoga i promise you that... Isliye no tension stress free... Secondly Koi bahaar se nahi aaega other then us and your family not even a vip can enter without my permission.... Bus yahi they rules that's it and guys don't even worry about it its nothing we got this...

Raju-thanks AP....

Ami-dude that's bad I made this up for you I told you the rules and you are thanking him instead of me...

Raju-itani bhi English nahi aati beta thoda toh hindi mix karo taaki idea aae...

Ajit-papa woh bolrahi hain ki thanks usse kaho sab ussi ne set kiya hai even sab rules wagairaah ussine bataaya aapko...

Raju-ohh! Thanks aapko bhi...

Ami-thats cool...

Raju - ab humlog bina tension reh shaktey hain... AP Uppar k rooms lelena aaplog main thoda kaam niptaalun aao surjit....

Ye bol woh dono andar chale gaye ab wahaan bacha party rehgayi khaali...

Ami-So hello guys i am Ami...

Sneha-hi Sneha... You are so cute...

Ami-awwww! Thank you...

Riya-Riya here... Nice to meet you..

Ajit-Hi Ami..

Ami-you both i know... Kal tak ek sath he they sab..

Ravi-lol...

Ashish-hahaa...

Ramu-Ramu...

Main-tu jinda Hai be Marra nahi abtak...

Ramu-I am Undead...

Main-what the shit is that... Undead matlab...

Ramu-Undead matlab amar.. Marrunga nahi...

Main-gajab gajab kahin English k professor k liye Apply kar bhai pakka job millegi...

Ramu-hehe.. Itani bhi achi nahi hai bhai...

Abeer-chup be.. Room bataadey humaare ... Process ye hai khaali 2 rooms caahiye ek ami k liye and dusara jisme 3 bed hon...

Ramu-lagwaadunga 3 bed abhi rukko...

Abeer-nahi abhi toh bola tha be bahaar se koi andar nahi aaega tumlog lagaao main help karwaa dunga...

Main-tumlog lagwaao main status leleta sabka...

Abeer-OK...

Main or Ami bahaar ki side aagaye haweli se... Jahaan garden tha chota but pyaar saa.. Usme space tha kaafi and benches lage they baithney ko....

Maine dono teams ko call karke status liya sab pohanchgaye they 2 bandey humessa ghar k bahaar rahenge and 2 andar... Bc kya din aagaye bodyguard banana padd raha hai ye lawde ko maar he denge arrest wirrest chhod detey hain...

Ami ne tabtak Raju k Bandon or guards ki position set ki keval wahi bandey rakhe jo saalon se raju k parti loyal hain like keval 7-8 guards he rakhe wahaan baaki jo uske chutiya lawde type aadmi yaa so Called gundey they sabko bhej diya udhar se... 3 bandey front gate par 3 bandey back gate par or 1 humessa patrolling Karega haweli ki.... Easy tha no fucking way woh humaare saamne se Surjit takk pohanchjaaega... Nope basically he lost... But still fight karna humaara kaam Hai...

Main or Ami bahaar he baith gaye benches par..

Ami-So she is the one...

Main-yes... RIYA...

AMI-by the....

Main-no more on this topic...

Ami-ok ok... Ye bata how was my leadership skills...

Main-great i must say you did very well...

Ami-awww! Thanks...

Main-ye ladkiyon waali chutiya harkat naa Kiya Kar tu..

Ami-what do you mean main ladki he hai...

Main-I mean baaki sab normal ladkiyon jaisi tu normal nahi hai...

Ami-OK ok sorry...

Thodi derr baad Abeer bhi bahaar aagaya... Uske sath sath Ajit Ashish or Sneha bhi bahaar aae... Ravi andar he rukka as thakk gaya tha toh rest leraha tha..

Abeer-all set boss...

Ami-good job AB....

Ashish - A AP kya situation hai...

Main-bola toh tha be chinta Matt Kar we got this kissi ko kuch nahi hoga...

Ashish - sure...

Main-Haan be chuti.. Haan be churan...

Ashish - thanks men... Waise aajkal Din unche hogaye humaare AP humaara personal bodyguard bangaya...

Main-chup re warna raipta khaaega...

Ajit-lol..

Main-A jaanwar chal thoda ghum k aatey...

Ashish-kidhar be...

Main-tera gaon dekhne bc tujhe kya itani panchayat haibe...

Ami-main bhi chalti...

Main-no you stay...

Ami- please..

Main-yahaan koi toh caahiye naa yaar aise naa Kiya Kar tu I hate when you do this...

Ami-ok.. I'll stay..

Sneha-Ami come on you can chill with us if you don't mind...

Ami-sure... Thank you.. I am already liking you...

Main jaanwar, Ashish or Ajit bahaar aae dukkan ki side nikale wahaan se cigarettes ki dabbi Lee..

Main - woh ladki kon haire...

Ashish-sochna bhi nahi lawde cousin hai meri...

Main-cousin he haina behen toh nahi...

Ashish - behen he lagaale mere mamaji ki ladki hai...

Main-fuck that rakh apne pass... Lawde puch bhi naa shakta ab...

Ashish - tera puchna maalum Hai mujhe...

Main-chutiye I am changed now last time kab flirting kartey dekha tha tu mereko...

Ashish - hmmmm..

Main-let me tell you kabhi nahi... Even woh thakur ki maal kritika takk ko chhodke aagaya main no. Takk naa diya usko lawde...

Ashish-baat toh teri theek he hai...

Main-toh gandu befaltu shakk karta hai..

Continued....

Update-49(Ami is Insane-1)

​
Humlog cigarettes peeke waapis andar aaye sabka status liya...

Abeer-Mujhe nahi lagta woh kuch Karega itana risk nahi lega what you say...?

Main-risk woh already le chuka chutiye live murder karke or fir police ko chunouti deke.... Toh ab ye kare yaa naa kare he is dead but agar karke bach gaya toh bc criminal sensation banjaaega attention millegi isko... He shouldn't have taken our name bro I am so pissed right now...

Abeer-yeah I know...

Main-like bhenchod I am here hiding and shit and you just fucking giving it to me... Like seriously bc... Isliye bolraha isko tapkaa detey hain...

Abeer-main kya bolta hun protection me and ami dekhlenge tu isko dhundle tabtak chalaa le Dimaag...

Main-nahi uth raha bc dead padda hai jab tak aafat sir par naa aajaae tabtak mera dimag matter ko seriously nahi leta bc... Bhenchod gandu hai mera dimag..

Abeer-pata hai bc Tera dimag terese bada bakchod hai...

Main-shyaam hogayi bc but nothing here...

Abeer-i am telling you bro that was a fraud...

Main-let's see lets see..

Abeer-But bc what the hell is his plan mujhe kissi bhi angle se woh ye samaaj k liye karta hua nahi lag raha... Ek nosikhiye mein itani himmat kahaan se aai...

Main-I told you Red John shit men like sabko maalum Hai ki John yahaan hai or jab John yahaan hoke khulla ghum Shakta Hai toh fir ye log kyun nahi ye sochke inmein himmat aaajati hai...

Abeer-But usse theek se maalum nahi tha humlog kon hain karke...

Main-wahi toh warna naam he naa leta... Iski Death baaki sabke liye open letter hogi jo aisa kuch karna caahtey hain karne se pehle he fatt jaaegi bc log ki..

Abeer-1.5 years and shit got real...

Main-It doesn't matter men shit will keep happening at least ab hum taiyaar toh hain... 9000+ hours of hard work, Dedication in hell finally pays off...

Abeer-Hard agree bc true...

Humlog garden se andar aae hall mein Raju and family baithi thi... Ami or Ravi bhi they toh abeer bhi baith gaya...

Raju-AP come here and sit with us....

Main-no thanks... I have better things to do Mera dinner le aaiyo ami...

Ami-OK boss...

Main room mein aaya kuch tha nahi karne ko I was bored as fuck bc kya karun kya karun isliye main waapis niche aaya...

Main-Jaanwar let's go something came up we gotta go we'll be back soon...

Abeer-kidhar....

Main- udhar he...

Abeer-ohh...

Raju-kahaan jaarahe...

Main-something serious came up we need to go asap...

Raju-AP please can you please take our security seriously...

Main-I am serious I told you ami is the best in the business she got this...

Raju- suna tha maine but ladki hai woh how much can she handle...

Abeer-ohh she can handle a lot more then you guys think trust me on that... She is the beast...

Raju-majaak Matt karo...

Abeer-tere 10 bandey woh akeli..

Raju-bus kar re hansa matt...

Abeer-comedian lagta hun main... Right now bula tere best 10 bandey and woh akeli...

Raju-kahin lagjaaegi bechari ko...

Abeer-i challenge you right now agar main jeeta toh tumlog woh jameen waapis dedoge free of cost Unlogon ko and agar main haara toh main woh jameen market price se double par khareedUnga tumse..

Main-rehndey re leave it...

Ami-please boss i am bored for like days now I need something..

Main-no you don't... Shut up..

Abeer-ab challenge hochuka ami ready hai chal raju...

Raju-well mujhe maalum Hai humaare bandey tumhaare Bandon ki tarah trained nahi hain but itane kamjor nahi hain ki ek ladki se maar khaajaaein phone karke bulaata hun abhi aajaenge gaon se..

Humne raju k bandey ghar bhej diye they toh usne bulaaya as gaon se he they woh... Sablog bahaar lawn mein aagaye I don't like this at all bc gand futtegi unki chalo bore hone se achaa Hai...

Main ashish ajit sneha and ami ek side khaddey hogaye... Riya Raju surjit Ramu and abeer ek taraf...

Tabhi raju k 10 hattey kattey bandey wahaan aaye raju ne specially motey tagdey bandey bulaae they... But doesn't matter she is just so good at this...

Ashish - kya lagta hai AP... Gaye paise tumhaare....

Main-lol you don't know her yet...

Sneha-still guess karo..

Main-I hate guessing i love to be sure... Starting me 1 aaega befaltu k swag mein 10 seconds nahi tikkega then shock k baad jab pata chalega ye kya hai tab 2 yaa 3 aaenge 70-80 seconds maximum lenge woh bhi... then jo boss hai usko chhodke Sab aaenge but jitane jyaada aaenge utana jaldi jaayenge because she love to trick people... Wohlog 1 minute tikkenge then boss aaega full form mein but gussa and darr usko confuse Karega and bam then she'll strike...

Ajit-what the hell future dekh k aaya kya...

Ashish-halwa Hai kya...

Main-wait and watch bc wait and watch...

Ek taraf ami thi saamne woh 10..

Raju-aaram se be jyaada nahi maarna ladki hai.. Aaram se... Daya karna... 1-1 jaao..

Ami-main daya nahi dungi..

Abeer-Ami dushman nahi hai play cool... Let's go...

Pehla banda aaya jo already distracted tha first kyunki ami usase size mein kam thi or ladki thi uppar se secondly bc ami ko dekh k blush kar raha tha... Smile karta hua woh aaya gentlemen banane ki koshish ki.. Lekin ami ne time waste nahi kiya jaise he woh uske pass aaya usne bhayankar punch uske pait mein diya bc punch mein speed itani thi jisase power double hogayi lawde ki aankhein bahaar aane ko hogayi naak or munh se Paani bahaar aaya or woh ghutno par girra or girtey he ami ne thoda boost leke uske thobdey par apna ghutna jadd diya jo lagtey he woh piche ki taraf jaagirra.. That took her 8 seconds... She is so fast... Uski speed uski power hai... Uske skills uski shield... Ab gand fatti Raju and company ki kyunki woh banda gaya tha hospital lambe time k liye thobds surgery se he theek hoga knee lagne k baad... baaki 9 k bhi thobdey khullgage they... Sath mein raju or family k bhi... Ab woh samjh gaye ki what they are dealing with... Abki baar 3 bhaagtey hue aae uski taraf Ami apni jagah par he rukki woh line se aarahe they ek k piche ek pehle ne ami ko punch maarna caaha par ami ne niche jhuk k usko dodge kiya woh aage ko nikal gaya as Bhaag raha tha and jhuke jhuke he Ami ne dusre k pait mein punch diya or then third se fir dodge hui... 2nd banda niche baith gaya as punch bahot tejj tha... Ab bache 2... Pehla hawa mein aaya or akela he aage badha usko maarne k liye lekin uska punch uth paata usase pehle Ami ne uske thobdey par ek jordaar punch diya... jisase woh thoda chakra gaya or uske turant baad he uski chest mein ek bhayaanak kick di jisase woh piche ko jaa girra... Ab bacha no. 3 woh ahista se aaya Ami ki taraf usne punch ki jagah kick maarni caahi lekin Ami sab kuch expect karti hai toh usne uski taang hawa mein he pakad li or right hand se uske thobdey par ek k baad ek 4 punches diye jisase woh bokhla gaya and then uske pait mein ek laat jamaadi uska pair chhodtey he woh niche jaa girra abtak first waala khadda ho chuka tha or uske khadda hotey he Ami uski taraf badhi or usko judge kiya and then left hand se ek fake punch diya jo usne rokk liya fake punch keval distraction k liye hota hai jo kaam Kar Gaya jaise he usne left hand kaa punch rokka Ami ne right hand se Uske munh par punch diya rakh k bc ki naak he tutt gayi hogi isase uska balance bigda or Ami ne ek or laat uske pait mein jamaadi boom woh bhi niche... Sabki gand fatt gayi thi udhar bc unko samjh mein he naa aaya ki ho kya raha hai aadhe time toh Unlog ko punch keval saamne waale ko padta hua dikhraha tha kyunki reactions Ami k itane fast they... Ab fir aae 3 bc kya chutiya log they yaa toh sab ek sath aajao yaa ek ek kar k aao aise kya bakchodi Kar rahe.. Teeno ne ami ko gherra ek Ami k piche tha and 2 aage Ami ne pehle piche waale ko judge kiya or Bina muddey he uski gotti par kick rakh k di woh goti pakadke niche baith gaya bc ki aankhein bahaar aane ko hogayi... Bc usne expect he naa Kiya hoga ki mujhe lage ga uski taraf toh dekh bhi naa rahi thi Woh... Saamne waale bhi yahi sochrahe they ki usko kaise laga or yahi unki sabse badi galti thi fight mein caahe jo bhi ho tumhaara dhyaan Opponent par hona caahiye tum distract hue saamne waala tumhe distract karega... Or aisa he hua ami ne saamne waale k munh par punch diya or dusre ko ek jumping kick di naak par holy fuck that kick was insane bina run boost liye khadey khadey he jump liya and itani power generate ki, k woh hatta katta aadmi niche jaa girra.. Or 3rd k girtey he usne dusre ko ek Orr punch diya and bam woh bhi niche....

Ami-come on come on lets do it...

Continued...

Update - 50 (Ami is Insane-2)

​
Ab bache last k 3, 1 unka boss tha as expected unmein se 2 badhe Ami ki taraf but abki baar ami ne strategy badli woh khaddi nahi rahi woh ulta unki taraf doud paddi or wohlog kuch samjh paatey usase pehle jump leke sabse aage waale k chest mein kick di bc Bruce Lee horahi thi puri... Kick lagtey he woh niche girra sath mein dusre ka bhi balance bigaad diya...jisase woh akela rehgaya bc darr gaya tha woh and woh sambhal paata isase pehle Ami ne punches ki bhochhar kardi uske pait mein bc woh react takk naa kar paaya saale ko 10-15 punches lage honge pait mein digestive system gaya hoga uska... Woh niche girra munh se thook ugalta hua... Jisko kick lagi thi bc woh utha he nahi Jaan bujh kar maalum tha Orr padegi... Ami uski taraf dekh k hans paddi or tab woh jo aakhiri boss bacha tha usne ami k side se aake ribs par punch diya Distraction is the key to losing ami ne wahi kiya aadmi kitana he tejj ho choti se choti galati usase bhi hojati hai... Punch lagtey he Ami niche girri or ye usse bilkul passand nahi aaya woh seedha jump lagake uthi kung fu style...

Abeer-opps.. Bhai you fucked up...

Woh firse ami ki taraf badha punch maarna caaha ami ne punch rokka or naa keval rokka balki dono hathon se uska hath pakadke jump lagaake dono taangon mein uska hath fans liya jisase woh niche girra Uss boss ka hath Ami k pairon or hath mein fansa tha usne Ami ko punch maare chuddane k liye..

Main-your hand is gone...

Or ussi time 'katak' karke Ami ne uska hath todd diya bc woh chilaaya buri tarah... Bc straight hogaya hath kandha uttar gaya uska wtf...

Sneha-ohhh godddd...

Ami ne hath chhoda toh woh ladkhadaata hua khadda hua or khadey hotey he ami ne ek jumping kick uske munh par di woh fir niche girra or girtey he ami ne uska dusara hath bhi pakada or bam same haalat uski ki..boss kaa bhosdaa bangaya bc uska... Ami kaa gussa abhi shant nahi hua tha bahot kuch tuttane waala Tha uska bc...

Abeer-bus kar re...

Lekin ami ne uski taraf dhyaan nahi diya...

ABEER-AP...

Ab jyaada hogaya tha Isliye maine he uska roukna theek samjha...

Main-Ami...

Or woh ye sunke jaanwarpann se bahaar aai...

Main-Done...

Ami - i just started to enjoy it...

Main-done I said...

Ami-OK ok...

Ami wahaan se side mein hatti Raju and team ki gand fatt gayi thi ki bc hai kya ye and she was indeed my deadliest weapon... She is the best at being the worst...

Un 10 mein se kuch girrtey padtey ladkhadaatey uthgaye they but baaki ko sahaara deke uthaaya bahaar waale guards ne...

Sneha-how do you...? How do you...?

Main-how do i what..?

Sneha-Ye sab kaise jaantey ho tum...

Main-Main Ye sab nahi Ami ko jaanta hun..

Ashish-bhai ye toh kuch Orr he hai Human nahi hai ye... What the fuck was that kick... Log Bhaag k naa kudd paatey itana he khaddey-2 kudd jaati hai...

Ajit-Or bc punching speed dekhi dhadaa dhadd palak jhapakney se pehle 3 punch maardeti hai...

Ashish -wahi toh bc Bruce Lee k 1 inch punch k baad yahi hai...

Main-Mujhe aata hai 1 inch punch...

Ashish - Abe jaa naa re chutiye.. Kuch bhi naa boll.. Kitane skills caahiye uske liye maalum..?

Main-maalum dikhaun...

Ashish-Bhaag be fainku...

Main-Matt Maan teri marji...

Abeer-toh Raju We win Kal he jameen louta dena...

Raju-woh toh theek hai, par ye hai kya mera matlab hai aisa bhi koi hota hai kya or hota bhi hai toh kaise... Ye itani tejj kaise move karti hai...

Abeer-it is what it is...

Raju-by God half time toh mereko punch uthata hua or fir saamne waale ko padta hua he dikha bich waala part tha he nahi....

Abeer - lol..

Ami-boss how was that...

Main-7.5...

Ami-oh come on I deserve an 8 Atleast that was SO cool...

Main-lol tu distract hui and even punch bhi khaaya I mean seriously...

Abeer-True...

Ashish - tumlog kya baat Kar rahe ho it is a 10 from us...

Ami-awww! Thank you..

Mela samaapatt hua and humlog waapis andar aaye ab time pass hogaya tha toh bahaar Jaane ki jarurat thi nahi... Isliye main wahan se seedha room mein aaya or Movies dekhne laga you know 'Netflix and Chill'... Or uske baad Ami dinner le aai mera abeer and Ravi kaa humlog ne dinner kiya...

Main-Shift leletey hain abhi se leke raat 1-2 baje takk main sambhal Lunga as meri movie baaki hai toh bahaar dekhlunga uske baad tu dekhliyo.....

Abeer-ok...

Main dinner karke apna lappy, meri pyaari deagle and earphones leke Niche aaya sathmein ek kambal bhi liya, bc thodi shardi jarur thi raatko bahaar aake main ek Pathar k bench par baith gaya bc Ajit Riya Ashish or Sawari chutiye wahaan badminton khelrahe they... What the fuck... I mean seriously... This is so fucked up bro.. Bhenchod badminton raatko woh bhi without net and ground...

Maine Lappy on kiya and jo movie baaki thi woh continue ki thodi derr mein woh log bhi bandh kiye khelna Riya seedha andar chali gayi Jabki Ashish Ajit and Sneha udhar aae...
Bc Sab sahi tha abtak toh maine riya se theek se eye contact takk nahi banaaya tha.. WOH Mujhe fully ignore kar rahi thi jabki main usko Orr jyaada ignore kar raha tha...

Ashish - sona nahi hai kya be..? ..

Main-Main sogaya toh tumlog permanently so jaaoge...

Ajit-lol take care men tu kahe toh main baithun idhar....

Main-naa chill maar mujhe waise bhi movie khatam karni hai tu baithke bore hoga idhar sojaao jaake...

Ashish - cool.. Good night bro...

Main-Night...

Sneha-Good Night..

Main-Good Night..

Wohlog wahaan se challe gaye or ab main wahaan akela tha bc Mast movie dekhunga... Maine aise he 2 bajaa diye movies dekhi and bich-2 mein chakkar lagaa leta.. Lekin kuch hath nahi laga... Thodi derr baad Abeer wahaan aagaya...

Abeer-bc jaag raha hai you'll make a brilliant guard...

Main-bc gand fatt gayi pathar par baithey baithey ab Mast sone diyo...

Abeer-mast sojaa as I told earlier it ain't gonna happen bus publicity stunt tha woh...

Main-tu dhyaan rakhiyo...

Abeer-haan be lawde...

Main room mein aaya and Mast so gaya bc bed par girtey he nind aagayi and subah apne aap be khulli... Time dekha toh bc 11. 30 baje they 9 ghantey soya bc gajab... Main fresh hua niche aaya toh Ashish Ajit Riya and Sneha college jaa chuke they uske alaawa sab apne apne kaam mein lage they bc bakchodi - 2 mein shyaam hogayi lekin kuch nahi hua kahin par bhi thoda saa bhi kuch nahi hua abtoh mujhe bhi shakk hone laga tha ki kuch hoga yaa nahi.. But mera dimag kehraha tha jarur hoga 100takka hoga and mera dimag kabhi galat nahi hota... Except jab maine pee rakhi ho tab chhodke tab mera dimag bhand hojaata hai...

Continued...

Update-51(AP Saved The Day)

​
Shyaam ko main Abeer, Ashish And ajit bahaar ko nikal gaye cigarettes laane as usual...

Main-Abe kya bola tere papa ne uss kand k liye...

Ashish - nothing maine bhi same Keh diya deva bhai ki tarah thodi misunderstandings hogayi thi isliye ye sab hua...

Main-Bc... Gajab...

Humne cigarettes pee thodi bakchodi peli and 20 minutes mein waapis aagaye haweli thodi piche ki taraf hai Raju ki udhar normal log k ghar wagairaah hain nahi as ye Gaon kaa Sardaar hai toh ye vip treatment mein rehta jo bahot he chutiyaa lagta mujhe bc...lekin jo hai so hai humlog waapis aaye or jaise he haweli k close aaye toh humari gand fatt gayi kyunki bc gate par 3 guards paddey they abeer ne nabaj check ki unki ...

Abeer-behonsh hain.. Lekin kaise...

Main-Woh sab baad mein bandey andar hain for sure 2 minutes maximum hain
Jaldi bhaag.. Tumlog rukko or backup bulaao.. Call Rohit...

Hum dono andar ki taraf bhaage toh raaste mein baaki guards bhi behons paddey they or jaise he haweli kaa gate kholla toh bc andar se dhuaan he dhuaan nikala woh bhi normal dhuaan nahi gas thi koi unknown abeer ko turant khaansi aagayi mujhe itana jyaada effect nahi karne waali thi as i said earlier koi bhi poisonous thing mujhe vertigo k kaaran jaldi he effect nahi karti... Maine deagle nikaali... Wahaan se hall mein mujhe 2 bandey khadey dikhe dhundala saa dikha par ye sure tha ki woh humaare aadmi nahi they kyunki unke munh par mask type kuch laga tha...

Main-ssshhh! Right Mera left tera inke mask lelenge fir .. ..

Abeer-wahaan takk pohanchjaaunga..?

Main-main pohanch jaaunga tera dekhle...

Abeer - behonsh he hounga marrne waali gas naa Hai chloroform type kuch hai...

Main bhaagke andar ghussa or just unke pass aagaya... Unko time nahi dena tha maine isliye turant pehle ki khopadi mein deagle daagdi or awaaj hotey he woh dusara kudda ussko abeer ne goli maari par bakchodi ye hui bakchod ne goli uske mask par maari jisase woh bandey k sath sath mask bhi gaya... Wahaan sofa par Riya Sneha Ami Or Ravi paddey they..

Main-tu mask le or Inko bahaar nikaal jyaada inhale kargaye toh gand marrjaaegi... Main andar dekhta hun...

Abeer - bina mask bc...

Main-time naa kharaab kar bhosdk.. Wohlog surely surjit k room takk gaye honge sab plan karke aaye honge bc itana sab kiya hai toh maalum hoga surjit kahaan millega...

Ye bolke main seedha Surjit k room ki taraf bhaaga jahaan gas bahot Kam thi bc gand Marr rahi thi isliye lambe time takk sans rokk k leraha tha surjit k room kaa gate khulla tha or andar 3 bandey they 2 k pass gun thi and 3rd ne Surjit ko pakada tha wohlog kidnap karke lejaanaa caah rahe they maine andar enter hotey he bina wait kiye pehle ko goli maari jisase Unlog ki gand fatt gayi or jabtak dusara meri taraf moodta tabtak uspar bhi goliyaan barsaa di atleast 3 goliyaan lagi hongi usko chest par dono gun waale gaye or abtak teesre ko realise hua ki ho kya raha hai to usne surjit ko meri taraf dhakka diya or turant room se bahaar bhaaga...

Main-bahaar bhaagiyo seedha or hall mein se sabko bahaar nikalwaa...

Ye bol main uss bandey k piche bhaaga woh haweli se Baahar nikala he tha ki saamne abeer ne uspar gun taandi...

Abeer-kahaan jaarahe bhai sahaab...

Bc bahaar hawa mein aake dhangkaa sans aaya Abeer Ravi or Sneha ko nikaal chuka tha..

Main-holy shshshsshshit ahem mm ahemmm... Bhosdk ab Bhaag..

Aadmi-tum usse kabhi nahi pakad paaoge...

Ye boltey he usne turant kuch capsule type apne munh mein daala or humlog kuch samjh paatey usase pehle uske munh mein se jhaag nikaleor usne apna galla pakad liya and niche girr padda khaanstey hue..

Main-what the fuck this is some alkaayeda level shit...

Surjit andar se ami or Raju ko sahaara deke laaya halke halke honsh mein they woh log main waapis andar gaya hall mein Riya Paddi thi maine usko godd mein uthaaya bc Pehli baar itana closely dekha hai kitane time baad same wahi masoomiyat uske cehre par thi main usko bahaar leke aaya tabtak woh aadmi marrchuka tha or baaki loggon k cehre par Paani maara jaaraha Tha jisase wohlog honsh mein aarahe they Ashish Ajit andar aagaye they unhone Rohit ko call kardiya tha ussi time.. Sablog bc aise uthe jaise hangover mein hon...

Ami-my head hurts.. What the fuck happened... Gas kahaan se aai ekdum...

Main-kand hogaya tttttttt....

Main bich mein he rukk gaya kyunki bc ekdum se pait mein gudgud hogayi main piche ko hatta bc ulti girregi surely .. main dusari taraf munh karke jhukk gaya or bc jo bhi khaaya tha woh sab nikalne laga munh se... Gand fatt gayi... Bc jyaada gas inhale karne k kaaran hua hoga...

Ami-AP you ok...?

Abeer-AP...?

Main-ppppppaaani...

Abeer ne hath mein liya Paani kaa dibba mujhe diya bc sans lene mein dikkat horahi thi maine hath munh dhoye or piche bench par lait gaya.. Aankhon Mein se Paani naa rukk raha tha bc or sans lene mein takleef horahi thi...

Abeer-AP...?

Main-Ruuuuuuhi...

Abeer-Ravi Ruhi ko call kar bol Ambulance leke pohanch ASAP... Yaa hospital he chalein...

Main-naa be not so serioussssss... Baaki Sab theek hain...? Unko dekh...

Abeer-sab theek hain tujhe k hua...

Main-jyaada Inhale karliya tha naa bc...... fuck...

Tabhi wahaan Anjali Or mangal ki gaadiyaaan aai... Jinme se Anjali mangal and Rohit Uttare...

Anjali - What the fuck happened here...?

Abeer - Don't ask bc log kaa plan toh brilliant tha but in the end AP saved the day...

Anjali - Kya hua tujhe... AP...?

Abeer ne unko pura kand samjhaaya...

Anjali - Holy fuck kya plan tha Unlog kaa...

Mangal-Sachmein bc Dimag pura ladaaya tha Unlog ne...

Main-Yep.. Humlog bhi use kar shaktey hain kahin naa kahin kaam aaega ye plan but unke bandey chutiya nikale or jagah galat chunni Unlog ne....

Mangal-Humaare wahaan hua hota toh lawde lagne they bc woh toh achaa hua tu tha yahaan jo gas mein ghuss gaya or jhell gaya humlog toh sab jaatey or behosh miltey..

Rohit-Good job captain...

Main-Bc lawde kaa captain gand marrgayi...

Or ek baar firse ulti hui bc pregnant hogaya hun lagta hai...

Anjali - hospital chalein..?

Main-Ruhi aarahi hai..

Abki baar ulti se bc thoda theek hua Sans normal hua or main Raju and family k pass gaya..

Main-Sab ok hai...?

Raju-Haan sab theek hain behonshi se bahaar aarahe guards bhi... thanks to you guyss...

Main-issi liye toh aae hain dude... Chill..

Tabhi ek ambulance bhi aagayi jisme Ruhi or ek doctor or 2 ward Boys bhi aaye...

Ruhi-what the hell happened..

Maine usko pura kand bataaya toh woh jo doctor tha uske sath usne mujhe check Kiya..

Doctor - achaa hua jo vomit kardiya aapne chinta karne ki koi baat nahi hai 2-3 baar or vomit karoge toh saara kachara nikal jaaega bus khaansi or Sans mein thodi dikkat rahegi 24 hours takk...

jyaada poisonous gas nahi thi or aapki body capable hai isase jyaada k liye bhi isliye don't worry all good bus ye medicines mangwaalijiye...

Main-thanks Doctor...

Uske baad uss doctor ne baaki sabko check Kiya Kuch guards ko ambulance mein daala gaya and Sneha or Raju ko hospital lejaaya gaya...

Thodi derr takk Fire brigade waalon ne woh gas nikaalo wahaan se laashein uthwaai gayi Anjali ne report banaai or thodi police waali routine hua and uske baad main seedha room mein jaake bed par girr gaya bhai ko call karke situation bataai woh Delhi mein they uske alaawa thodi normal bakchodi hui Ashish k bapu aaye wagairaah wagairaah raatko kuch khaaya nahi main lekin halki-2 vomiting puri raat rahi raat ki shift Abeer or Ami ne sambhaali iss kand k baad sab jagah security double kardi gayi subah takk uske 24 hours bhi khatam hojaaney they or uska behtreen paln fail hone k baad ab woh kuch na kar shakta tha isliye mere hissab se koi Orr attack naa hoga lekin fir bhi security double kardi gayi thi in case....

Continued...

Update-54(Its Time)

​

Jiya-Ab niche chalein almost 3 hours se Paani takk naa peeya hai iss room mein baithey baithey....

Main-Let's go...

Humlog wahaan se niche aae toh sablog hall mein he baithey they... Riya Ashish Ajit or sneha bhi aachuke they... Uske alaawa Anjali, Rajat, Ajay, Deepak, Abeer, Mangal, Babhi, Sam, Ravi,Rohit.. Surjit Raju or Ramu baithey they... Even Deva bhai bhi aachuke they wahaan par...

Deva- Pakadliya naa...?

Main-Aise kaise bhai he is too smart..

Deva-No way tera chehra bataa raha you got him... Or tujhse smart nahi hai woh.... Bol naa be...

Babhi-bataa naa re pakadliya....?

Main--Orr kya Jaane deta halwa Hai kya we got him....

Ye sunsabke cehre khill uthey bc maano Red John he pakada gaya ho...

Main-But the thing is abhi tumlogon ko batane waala nahi hun main woh kon hai thoda rukko saamne he laake khadda kardunga... Bus thoda rukko...

Abeer-abe suspense bandh karbe...

Mangal-wahi toh bc...

Main-shut up...wait and watch...

Humlog wahaan baithey or bc Paani peeya galla sukkh gaya tha.... Bc itana bada kand kardiya tha lekin Riya abhi bhi nahi bhaaw derahi thi gand marwaae caahiye bhi nahi bc bhaaw... Ek toh lawde tu koi ladki dhundale warna aise he gand marrti rahegi gand mein ghussaale Riya ko... Bc single pann tere sirr par chadd gaya hai.. Ek time hota tha jab harr week nayi girlfriend hoti thi teri bc or ab single single... Ok ok shaant bc dhundlunga koi ladki part time he sahi but yep dhundlenge...

Abeer-Humlog wait kiska kar rahe hain fir...?

Main-Uske phone kaa...

Abeer-what the hell woh tujhe phone Karega..?

Main-Yep....

Mangal - Ek second Woh killer khud tujhe phone karega...

Main-Yep...

Mangal-how...?

Main-Main msg Kiya tha usko..

Tabhi mera phone baja jisse dekh mere cehre par muskaan aa gayi... Maine phone answer kiya...

Main-Hello Mr. KILLER...

Saamne se ek bandey ki awaaj aai...

Aadmi-How... I mean how... Kaise...

Main-They call me AP for these reasons ... I am too fast dude way more faster then you like 1000 times faster then you... Isliye isme Matt padd paglaa jaaega...

Aadmi-Tune msg mein likha hai ki abhi police ko nahi bataaya Hai tune kuch bhi...

Main-Kissiko bhi nahi bataaya Hai...

Aadmi-toh kya caahiye...

Main-Main bore horaha tha yaar... Or tujhe challenge caahiye Tha toh dediya... Your Gang vs Us...

Aadmi-Or Agar main jeeta toh...

Main-Nahi jeetega...

Aadmi-Agar jeet gaya toh...

Main-"Agar" bc matlab confidence tujhe hai nahi khud par chal agar tu jeeta toh tera raaj raaj he rahega...

Aadmi-Jubaan deta hai apni...

Main-Haan... Ab jagah bata teri yaa meri...

Aadmi-Meri..adress message karta hun 1 hour mein wahaan aaja... No police force no additional force...

Main-Khaali meri team k bandey honge...

Aadmi-OK... Done... Lekin lekin usase pehle apne loggon ko toh sambhaal...

Main-Mere aadmi sambhale hue hain already...

Aadmi-Sab nahi sambhale abhi baaki hain..

Main-Matlab..

Aadmi-Matlab ye ki Meenu, Tumhaare Guptaji or Rishi woh kahaan hain maalum...?

Maine turant ishaare se pen and paper maanga Ashish ne turant mujhe pen and paper diya...

Main-Tere pass toh nahi hain ye maalum hai...

Aadmi-But ho shaktey hain agar jaldi Action naa liya toh...

Maine Paper par Likha pooja, Ajay and Sam secure Rishi then jiya, Ravi, Rohit secure Meenu then Rajat and Deepak secure Guptaji... Or ye dekhtey he wohlog turant nikale wahaan se...

Main-Untak naa pohanchega tu.. Woh secure hain don't worry...

Aadmi - Dekhtey hain... Address bhejta hun main theek 1 ghantey mein aaja... Or dhyaan rahe koi shyaanpatti nahi...

Main-See you soon...

Call disconnected...

Deva-kya hua...?

Main-Bulaaya Hai bhai sahaab ne..

Deva-or tu chala jaaega..?

Main-offcourse jaaunga plan toh mera he hai...

Deva-Chal main bhi sath chalunga...

Main-Nahi aap idhar he rukko babhi or Raju family k pass Main Ami anjali Mangal or jaanwar jaatey hain easy peasy...

Deva-easy kaise..?

Main-Uske pass utane bandey hain nahi... Sab research karke he toh plan kiya hai warna aapko toh maalum he hai main befaltu kuch naa karta... Ab kya maalum ye uska plan ho or humaare wahaan jaatey he woh yahaan aajae isliye aap sab k sath yahaan rukko...

Deva-theek..

Main-Or Haan humaare piche koi force yaa bandey nahi bhejna warna dikkat hojaaegi uska ilaaka hai najar harr jagah hogi..

Deva-ok take care be dhyaan se Jaana tumlog....

Main-Sure...

Ashish-take care bhai...

Main-I will... Let's go guys...

Uska message aachuka tha industrial ilaaka tha yahaan se 15 minutes ki drive par wahin ek bandh paddi building mein Tha woh... Uske pass mujhe address dene k alaawa koi chaara tha nahi kyunki maine usko dhundliye tha toh address bhi dhundleta or fir force lejaake gand maardeta uski ab uske kamsekam 5% chances toh hain ki hum force leke naa aaenge...

Ami-mera samaan kidhar hai...

Main-Rr mein he hai wahi lejaaenge humlog..

Ami-then cool...
Humlog ne apni guns Lee or seedha RR mein aae... Abeer drive kar raha tha...

Abeer-kya lagta hai....

Main-easily jeetjaaenge humlog no. 1 uske pass bandey kam hain no. 2 woh bandey bhi chutiya hain no. 3 unka leader chutiya hai no. 4 woh darrpokk hai or gandu bhi... Gand fodd denge ek ek ki...

Abeer-Ek Minute gand humlog fodenge tu durr he rahiyo...

Ami-yep you are not getting involved here....

Main-What...?why...?

Abeer-bhoolgaya kya be chutiye tu befaltu fights mein naa paddiyo... Warna dikkat hojaaegi...

Main-Usne kahi thi or tune maanli thi.... Bc aise thodi naa kuch hota hai...

Abeer-i don't care kya kuch hota hai bus tu ladega nahi... Jabtak hum khaddey hain tere liye tujhe ladne ki koi jarurat hai nahi...

Ami-exactly we got this...

Anjali - ek minute ye ho kya raha hai bc...

Mangal-Exactly what the fuck...?

Main-oh shit tum log bhi they kya...?

Anjali-Haan or jarra samjhaa mujhe what the fuck are you guys talking about...?

Main-we. W. W. W. Oh...

Abeer-Main bataata hun...

Main-Shabbas bata...

Abeer-actually jo iska doctor tha naa udhar USA mein woh bahot he behtreen tha tabhi ye bacha hua hai uppar se iska trainer bhi badhiya tha un dono ne isko theek hone k baad kaha tha jitana ho shake khudko violence se durr rakhna beshak apna dimag usme ladaa Dena lekin Khud jahaan takk ho shake Physically involve naa hoiyo.. Because vertigo kaa time bahot Khoon kharaabey mein beeta tha apan sabka surendra k kaaran toh iske dimag ko aadat hogayi thi Insabki usko khoon kharaabey se lagaav hai jo ki achi baat hai nahi... Ab ye waapis ladega toh uske kya kya side effects ho shaktey woh kissiko nahi maalum but chances hain ki woh side effects jaanlewa honge...

Shabbas bc gajab kya Kahaani sunaai hai lawde...

Mangal-Then tu fight nahi karne waala nope not happening...

Anjali-bilkul humlog sambhaal lenge...

Main-lawda bc OK...

Hum ilaake mein pohanch chukey they ye ek simple c puraani bandh paddi building thi jiske parking lot mein humein Jaana tha... Gaadi seedha parking lot mein he ghusaadi humlog ne... Toh ye ilaaka baaki building se behtar tha jaise haal he mein renovation kiya gaya ho underground tha toh pure hall mein lights jall rahi thi badi badi.... Or ye puraa khaali tha ek kone ko chhodke udhar kuch samaan padda tha computers, stand lights, cables chairs etcetera toh ye tha jahaan se live filming hoti thi... Or uske just side mein khadey they kareeb 10 aadmi or unke aage khadda tha woh mask waala aadmi same mask lagaae.... Humlog ne unse thodi durr gaadi rokki or apni apni guns taangli..

Main-Kissi bhi time hamle k liye ready rehna Mangal tu andar he reh dikhna nahi abhi usse... Kya pata kya bakchodi kiya ho woh..

Mangal-ok-...

Mangal andar he rukk gaya waise bhi car par black film thi toh bahaar dikha nhi hoga hum kitane bandey they... Humlog niche uttare... Or uski taraf badhey or thodi durr jaake rukk gaye... Wohlog bhi thoda aage badhe or humaare saamne aake rukk gaye...

Main - Wassup...

Aadmi-Aagaye tumlog marrne...

Main-Nahi maarne... Bahot farak hai dono mein...

Aadmi-All things apart pehle toh ye bataa tune mujhe pakada kaise...

Main-Tu yahin atka hai abhi lol...

Anjali-bataa re humein bhi toh Pata chale....

Main-Toh ladies and gentlemen Ye hain Saurabh Tiwari... Ummar 38 peshe se builder they lekin real mein UP k Saharapur k local gundey rehchuke hain ye... Paisa bahot tha inke pass... Toh 1.5 saal pehle Inko realise hua ki inki gang ab chotti hoti jaarahi hai or income kam hoti jaarahi hai or police bhi ghar takk aane lagi hai tab inhone dimag ladaaya or socha ki kaala dhanda bandh kartey hain toh Ek bandey se Inko kaafi paise lene they jo apne news channel 24 kaa puraana maalik tha usase Inko paise lene they lekin paise uske pass they nahi ab ye thehrey gundey mawaali toh inhone usse darra dhamka kar channel khareed liya uppar se inki almost bachi khuchi kamaai bhi lag gayi lekin channel inka hogaya channel bhi uss time north India mein top 10 mein tha toh khussi khussi leliya but dikkat ye hui ki uske kaafi naami cehre puraane maalik k sath nikal liye or ab channel k lawde lage kyunki main cehre jaachuke they toh ye nuksaan mein gaya bechara ab tak toh ye pura kaa pura karj mein hai toh ab woh kehtey haina once a criminal always a criminal toh isne firse apna dimag chalaya or ye sab plan kiya taaki iska channel uth shake or aisa hua bhi check karo last kuch din mein iska channel kahan se kahaan pohanch gaya hai.. Lekin afsosh ye pakada gaya...

Abeer-what the fuck...

Anjali-seriously...

Main-yep..

Abeer-lekin iske pass itane loyal bandey kaise aaye jo iske liye apni Jaan dedein bc suicide karlein...

Main - actually yahaan ye kaafi sahi khel gaya tha... Tera mask hata be... Abtoh maalum
He hai sabko..

Usne apna mask hataya toh uska chehra saamne aaya...

Main-Abeer iss bandey ko thodi much and daadhi k sath imagine kar...

Abeer-hmmm... Ek second what the fuck.. What the fuck... Ye toh wahi hai jisne Suicide ki thi...

Ye sun Anjali or ami bhi chownkey...

Main-exactly but thodi dikkat ye hai ki suicide ki nahi thi khaali acting ki thi... Isne woh dawaai khaali jisase isko ulti wagairaah honi thi baaki isne acting ki or jab humne check Kiya toh bc Marra hua laga and jaise he gaadi yaan wagairaah aai tab gayab hogaya... Nakli makeup k sath aaya tha ye...

Abeer-holy fuck that was awesome...

Continued.....

Update-56(The Flirty King Returns)

​
Wahaan se humlog Raju k yahaan aae Rishi Guptaji or Meenu ko bhi wahaan leke aaya jaa chuka tha humein dekhtey he wohlog bc firse jhum gaye chaaron taraf...

Deva-done...?

Main-Done Dana done...

Ye sun sabke cehron par muskaan aagayi Rajat Ajay Pooja jiya or deepak crime scene k liye nikal gaye...

Deva-kya scene Tha...?

Main-Noob log easy tha detail mein gharpar bataaUnga...

So raju men all done thanks for the Cooperation humlog nikaltey hain ab...

Surjit-Thank you very much AP.. You saved my life...

Main-Anytime men anytime...

Raju-Thanks AP...

Main-welcome... Lets go guys..

Wahan se humlog haweli aaye or maine raaste mein sabko bataaya kya hua Bhai ko media k liye story bhi bataadi Anjali or bhai thodi derr mein Press conference karne waale they and that was about it ye khatam hua or ab suru hua main mission...

Kon RedJohn.. Nahi re lawde.. Toh kon Sanjay... Nope.. Toh bc kon principal toh nahi... Lawda Mera Naya mission hoga AP'S Flirty image returns.... Gajab bc...

Let the Flirt game begins...

Actually main bahot jyaada bore tha aisi life se like bc kissi se theek se baat bhi naa kar paata tha main kyunki humessa kand mein he ghussa rehta hun or ab mujhe waapis old AP banana tha gand Marrae Riya harr week badalenge ab.. Unleash The old AP... Let's see kitana tejj hai itane time baad..

Ab yahi hona tha aaj kaa din bakchodi mein he nikal gaya or next day main college k liye ekdum chakachakk ready hua full show off mein bc.. Main ravi or Sam Breakfast k liye baithey they..

Ravi-What the fuck... Ye kya pehna haibe kiski Shaadi Hai.?

Main-Bhosdko bahot hui bakchodi itane time se kuch nahi Kiya Hai lagta hai firse virgin banjaaunga... Bhosdko old you ko jagaao apne andar let the fucking game begin...

Ravi-Seriously... Waise dekha jaae toh I am bored as fuck bhenchod harr koi ladki k sath ghumm raha hai...

Sam-Wahi toh bc chutiyon ki tarah dikhtey hain hum...

Main-Woh kehtey haina "EVERYONE IS A PLAYBOY UNTIL THE REAL PLAYBOYS WALKS IN" or real toh hum he hain thode slow he hue hain kya hua baaki se toh ab bhi tejj he hain...

Sam-let's fucking go... Let me change my clothes again...

Ravi-Same...tu car kaa jugaad karbe... Apne waali saari lejaa chuke new dekh koi jaa garage..

Main-Abe rishi mujhe gift dene waala Tha ek or car uss din jaldi jaldi mein maine pucha nahi... Usko jagaata tumlog kapdey change karo...

Ye bol main seedha rishi k room par gaya or darwaja knock Kiya..

Main-Uth be lawde... Kitana soega marrjaaega sotey sotey..

Rishi-dekho bol kon raha hai jo khud 15 ghante takk soleta hai.. Aaja gate khulla hai..

Main andar gaya toh woh laptop par kuch kaam Kar raha tha..

Main-Kyun be lawde maardun teri gand..?

Rishi-Bhag bc... Ye kya ready hua hai kidhar jaaraha..?

Main-Past mein...

Rishi-what the fuck time machine banaaya kya be lawde..

Main-Past means past waala AP is back.. The flirt king returns...

Rishi-what the fuck seriously bhosdk...

Main-Hell yeah... Tu ye bata tu mujhe ek or car gift karne waala Tha konsi hai woh...

Rishi-Mast suit karegi image par...

Main-naam bol bhosdk naam.. Intejaar naa horaha...

Rishi-Bentley Bentgaya...

Main-aahhhhh... Holy fuckkkkk....

Rishi-bhosdk yahin muth maardega kya... Sun car nahi beast hai 4 seater ..approximately 4000 cc engine 320 to 440 kw horsepower.. Top speed 300 KM/Hour.. 1 se 100 km/hour in just 4 seconds... Fully GPS .. Black tinted bulletproof windows...

Main-what the fuck... What the actuall fuck...

Rishi - 4 crore 19 Lakh I spent on this fucking car bro... This is a beast..

Main-bhenchod ye toh Maserati se bhi uppar ki hai what the fuck.. You fucking rock bhai...

Rishi-Surendra k business kaa saara profite yaa toh Gareeb loggon ko jaata hai yaa trusts ko anaarth aashram and old-age homes wagairaah mein or kuch hissa apan 4 (You Me Sam and Ravi) ki cars and luxury life mein or fir bhi tere bank account mein kaafi aajaata Hai...

Main-ok nikaltey fir college jaanekaa Hai I love you thanks...

Rishi-Anytime bro anytime.. Dhyaan se chalaana bus handling thodi ruff Hai...

Main-apun sambhaal lega... Apun is bhest driver...

Main niche aaya toh Ravi or Sam bhi chakkachak ready hochuke they...

Ravi-Kaunsi gaadi hai be.

Main-teri gand fatt jaani hai bhosdk.. Aaja dikhata hun...

Hum garrage mein aaye toh wahaan par ek 23-24 age kaa ladka duty par tha jo mujhe Jaana pehchaana laga like kidhar toh bhi dekhela tha usko... Yaad aaya bc ye toh wahi hai apne shyaam kaka kaa ladka jo last time humein CD bar mein Milla tha jidhar main Breakup k baad daru peene gaya tha or iske sath baith ke pee thi...

Main-Rahul...?

Rahul-Arrey AP bhai yaad hun aapko..

Main-off course bc keval ladkiyon k naam bhoolta hun doston k nahi...

Rahul-Kaise ho Bhai...

Main-bindaas men.. Teri duty yahaan hogayi...

Rahul-Haan kabse yahin hun abhi kuch din ghar gaya tha toh dusra tha yahaan par...

Ravi-CD bar k bandh Hone k baad se yahin hai ye...

Main-shabbas.. Sun check kar bentley Bentgaya kidhar par hai bol toh...

Rahul-ek second bhai...

Usne apne laptop mein check Kiya toh bc ye lambi list thi cars ki...

Rahul-Chamber no. 17 mein bhai left mein...

Darshall haweli k just back side mein garage hai ye ek badi si building hai jisme 3 parts hain underground, ground and first floor underground ko humne Office banaaya Hai Crime fighting k liye and first or ground floor par gaadiyaan hain and believe me bahot saari gaadiyaan...

Main Car k pass gaya toh bc ekdum chakkachak shining maar rahi thi bc gajab look dekh gand fatt jaaegi loggon ki.. Maine hanger se key Lee or car start ki bc gand faad awaaj thi car ki..

Main bahaar leke aaya toh sam or Ravi ki toh aankhein bahaar aane ko hogayi...

Ravi-Are maadarchod ye kya hai.. Gajab...

Sam-Bc faadu.. Tabaahi hai bhai...

Rahul-Fire bhai.

Main-Yo chalo Bc late horahe...

Wohlog baithey...or hum college k liye nikal liye.. Ekdum makhan ki tarah chal rahi thi car... Full paisa wasool..

Sam-Aatey hue main chalaaunga..

Main-ok..

Humlog college pohanchey or jaise he college mein entry Lee toh bc students lage ghurrne ektak lawdon ne life mein aisa kuch naa dekha hoga even tv par bhi...

Wahaan se main parking mein gaya toh wahaan bc lovers point Banaa hua tha ladke or ladkiyaan baithey they wahaan bikes par scooteys par kuch cars mein lekin keval baat he kar rahe they not that much. But fir bhi bahot bakchodi thi.. Or humaari entry hotey he unki baatein hui bandh or ghurrna hua chaalu... Car park karke humlog uttare pure goggles woggles lagaake bc maahool he alag tha pura...

Humlog wahaan sabko ignore kartey hue nikale as sab chutiya log booked they.. Maine rohit ko call kiya...

Main-Kidhar bhosdk....

Rohit-Just aaya hun Car Park karke... Ye bata woh bentley mein tumlog they kya lawdo..

Main-Yo.. Wassup...

Rohit-Gajab bhenchod gand faad car bhai...

Main-Yep.. Canteen pohanch humlog aarele...

Rohit-Yo..

Call disconnected...

Humlog canteen pohanchey toh wahaan kaafi bheed thi or humein group waali tables milli jispar Rohit baitha tha uske alaawa Divya Arushi, Sana, Ritu, Ashish, Ajit, Mouni or Sneha baithey they... Humein bhi udhar he baithna padda...

Main-What the fuck.. Itani bheed kaise hai aaj...

Rohit-thoda jaldi aagaye apan log...

Main-Cool.. So Wassup everyone all good...?

Sab-yep..

Mera mobile baja Nicki mam kaa call Tha....

Main-Wassup madam..

Nicki-kaisa hai tu..

Main-mast...

Nicki-yaar ek toh tu time se phone naa uthaata... Maine Deepu or Sam ko call karke situation pata kari Kal...

Main-sorry kaam mein ghussela tha main you know my dimag. ..

Nicki-yeah yeah... Waise kahaan Ho tumlog ..?

Main-canteen... aarahe classmein on time...

Nicki-shabbas.. I'll see you here then..

Call disconnected..

Main-Nicki madam Kal tereko call ki thi kya..?

Sam-Yep like 3 times.. Tu uthaa nahi raha tha so..

Rohit-Ab free haina bhai tu yaa or koi kaam baaki hai..

Main-Abhi free hun lekin Kab tak ye maalum nahi bc mere kaam tujhe pata he hai bataake nahi aatey... Kya pata kab aajae..

Rohit-Sun Cricket tournament aaraha hai.. Tu khel raha haina.

Main - Hell no bro...

Ashish - what the fuck kyun be...

Rohit-Abe abtoh tera Steve Smith bhi waapis aagaya abtoh khel bhai... Dude we need you badly...

Main-Kab hai tourney...

Ashish-This Sunday...

Main-what the fuck 2 din mein ghanta practice naa hogi saalo kitane time se khelna toh durr cricket dekha bhi nahi hai befaltu haaroge tumlog...

Rohit-Biatch please you are AP dude by far the best cricketer I have ever played with you don't need practice bc bina practice he theek hai tu...

Ashish - Haan bc tu ulta bhi KHELEGA toh bhi hum jeetjaaenge.. Warna pakka haarenge bc...

Iss bich mera main motive tha Mouni ko line Dena or ye thoda bahot kamyaab bhi horaha tha dude Mouni bahot he hot thi like fire... Bc Bengali beauty at its best.. Target lock hochuka tha bc... She was like haawt as hell..humdono kaa eye contact hua toh usne mujhe ek smile di.. Waisa he maine kiya..

Main-next time yaar abhi haaro tumlog..

Cricket is life bc but tournament mein Bina practice Jaana matlab beijjati thi isliye main naa bolraha Tha...

Continued...

Uodate-57(Nope Not Happening)

​
Divya-So the AP show dekhne ko nahi millega ab...

Main-Not in tournament but in future hell yeah...

Mouni-Ye kya hota hai...

Ashish - You'll know once you see him play cricket dude he is best in cricket... He's so good at everything...

Sneha-Seriously even better then Abhi...

Rohit-way way more better then him..

Main-Ye Abhi kon..?

Rohit-President.. Aaya hai aaj..

Main-Nice nice... Chalo be class kaa time hogaya..

Humlog wahaan se uthkar class ki taraf chal diye toh hum bahaar nikale toh saamne se lucky or 3-4 bandey aarahe they...

Sam-Woh Black shirt waala Abhi hai president..

Maine dhyaan se dekha toh dikhne mein theek tha fashion sense badhiya tha or show off bhi.. Hatta katta 21-22 age kaa ladka tha.. Wohlog just mere saamne aake rukk gaye..

Abhi-So finally we met.. Myself Abhi.. Hello..

Maine usase hath milaya...

Main-AP..

Abhi-Oh come-on dude I know tum kon ho..

Main-Great Nice to meet you...

Abhi-Same here.. See you around..

Main-You will actually..

Abhi-kaise Rohit Bhai? . Sam Ravi how are you guys..

Rohit-badhiya badhiya...

Sam-cool.. Cool..

Ravi-tu bata be theek hogaya naa abtoh...

Abhi-Arrey bilkul fit.. Cricket Practice mein miltey hain...

Ye sun Rohit wahaan se Apni class ki taraf cut liya or Main sam and ravi apni class ki taraf... Bichmein Paani peene ko rukkey and then class ki taraf waapis..

Class k bahaar as usual Students Nicki madam se doubts clear kar rahe they... Bhen k lawdon class toh suru hone do bakchod aisa kya doubt hai jo class se pehle he aajaata Hai.. Class k baad bhi doubt class k pehle bhi doubt bhenchod padhtey kya hain...

Wahaan Mouni Sneha Ashish or divya they..

Main-Wassup Nicki mam..

Nicki-good good.. On time...

Main - Hell yeah.. How Do I look..?

Nicki-Ahem Ahem..

Main-I was asking Sam..

Sam-Dirtbag.. Just the same..

Main-Shut Up..

Ye sun sablog hanspaddey..

Sam-Nicki mam Class mein aaoge yaa aaj bahaar he lagaaoge class..

Ravi - Yeah I don't understand this at all aisa kya doubt hota hai yaar jo clear he nahi hota.. I mean class end par bhi class mein bhi even class se pehle bhi..

Nicki-Samy You know the difference between them and you 3 you guys study for passing marks and they study for 1st devision...

Main-First that's racist of you mam.. Second what do you mean by you 3 main toh kuch bola bhi nahi and you know i can study all this in less then 24 hours...

Nicki-I am damn Sure you can but I know for a fact that you won't... AP I known you till now for what 12 years or something like that..

Main-13 years..

Nicki-exactly main 13 saal se tumhe jaanti hun i know tum kuch bhi kar shaktey ho but I also know tum kya karoge..

Main-ok you sounded exactly same as Deepu Babhi...

Nicki - Because we both are the same..

Main-I am bored.. Let's go guys..

Nicki-see you inside...

Hum 3no andar aakar baith gaye apni apni seats par...

Sam-Bc I think tujhe khelna caahiye...

Ravi-Same isase better chance naa hoga tera impression pure college par daalne kaa....

Main-woh pata hai bc but you know kitane time se cricket naa khela hun main ye plan ulta pad jaaega toh bc beijatti bahot honi hai..

Ravi-oh come on bc koi Australia ki team k against nahi khelna hai dusre colleges ki he team aayengi khaali you can easily get back your form... And ek baar bc even ek match mein bhi tera touch waapis aaya toh tu fir harr match mein faad dega..

Main-lekin agar touch aaya he nahi toh...

Sam-bc you are AP bhoolgaye kya you can do anything.. Or cricket toh tere baaein hath kaa khel hai..

Main-ok bc let's see aaj practice time dekhtey hain..

Nicki mam class mein aai or unhone padhaana suru kiya and as expected mujhe lawda kuch samjh naa aaya...

Uske baad Ritika madam aai same usne bhi kuch padhaaya jo durr durr takk mujhe maalum nahi tha.. But ab ek faayda tha ab main jyaada bore naa hota tha class mein puri class nikaal deta tha easily.. Uske baad apne Amit Sir aae woh banda Mast time pass karwaagaya padhai k sath sath majaak bhi chalta raha and finally aaj ki classes over hui..

Main-Abe tumlog chalo ground main aata hun thoda kaam niptaake..

Actually mujhe Anshul dikh gaya tha woh Doctor Ruhi kaa bhai and woh Mouni k sath kaafi rehta hai so confirm karletey hain ki kya scene Hai uska bc kahin issi ki setting naa ho woh.. Waise hogi nahi I am sure shakal se he dikhjaata hai... Main Anshul k sath canteen mein aake baitha..

Main- sun ye bata ye Jo Mouni hai ye teri kya lagti hai.. I mean Girlfriend yaa fir koi relative toh nahi hai..?

Anshul-Nahi bhai keval dost hai..

Main-You sure..?

Anshul - damn sure bhai..

Main-dekh baad mein main set Karlun toh bolnaa nahi...

Anshul-Bindaas karo bhai i dont have any problems...

Main-shabbas.. Ye Bataana nahi kissiko bc..

Anshul-nope..

Main-gajab... Oye Lax isko special peela ek..

Laxman-OK bhai..

Ye bolke main wahaan se seedha ground mein aaya udhar Par puri gang mojuud this Sam Ravi Ashish Ajit Rohit Lucky or 2-4 punter ground mein they unke alaawa Sneha Mouni Divya or kuch students side mein baithey they... sam wagairaah Sab dress change kar chuke they...

Sam-Kapdey change kar aa..

Main-naa i am good khaali dekhna hai kuch baaki hai kya sareer mein.... Bat de be lodu..

Rohit-le bey..

Maine bat pakada bc ajeeb saa lag raha tha main crease par aaya ashish ball liye khadda tha..

Main-chutiye sam ko dede ball.. Tujh jaison ko toh main nind mein bhi maardunga jab test karna ho toh humessa best k saamne karna caahiye...

Sam ek gand faad fast bowler tha or ek kaafi sahi middle order batsman agar uski bowling main thodi bhi khel gaya toh hum tournament khel shaktey hain...

Sam ne run up liya maine only helmet lagaaya or hogaya ready sam ne Pehli ball daali jispar maine kaafi late defense kiya lekin ball rokkney mein kamyaab rhaa...

Sam-bc what the fuck itana slow dhyaan kahaan Hai...

Main-Bc reflexes takk slow hogaye hain be... Jaa doobara jaa bc...

Sam ne wapis lamba run up leke ek or fast ball daali maine abki baar bhi defend karna caaha but abki baar kaafi late bat aaya tabtak ball meri gilli udaake nikal Lee... Clean bowled bc..

Main-Nope Not happening see you all around fuck this shit...

Rohit-Abe woh Sam hai iss jaisa bowler dusri teams mein Hain he nahi.... Chutiya types bowlers hain...

Main-nope fuck no... I aiNt playing shit...

Ye bol maine helmet nikaala or seedha ground se bahaar aagaya... Wahaan Sneha or Mouni mojuud thi or sneha ek side mein phone par lagi thi.. Main seedha Mouni k pass gaya...

Main-Hi...

Mouni-Hey... Bad day in field..

Main - kind off i am little bit off as I told them but still unko lagta hai ki main khel shakta hun..

Mouni-I mean jab itane Bandon ko lagta hai toh even mujhe bhi lagta hai you should play..

Main-naa naa I don't want to be a liability to the Team... bloody no. 1 cricketer in University still getting out on ducks and all nope not happening...

Mouni-So hum introduce nahi hue they theek se...

Main-My bad Main gayab he rehta hun humessa..

Mouni - But for a good reason...

Main-off course.. So you know me My name is AP you know what my family does... My bio is little bit boring so let's switch to yours..

Mouni-Yeah LOL.. I AM Mouni We are originally from Kolkata...

Main-that I can see by sweetness in your voice...

Mouni-oh god please..

Main-lol..

Mouni-but my dad shifted here way ago before I was born..

Main-kya kartey hain dad..

Mouni - Oh he is the principal of the college...

What the fuck.... What the fuck... What the fuck...

Main-oho toh principal sir ki beti ho aap nice nice nice to meet you again...

Mouni-same...

Main-so enjoy the match I'll take a leave.. . Bye...

Mouni-buhbye..

Ye bol main wahan se cut liya bhenchod seriously lawde kya chutiya hai meri kismat bhenchod... But no worries we will find someone else fuck her...

Continued...

Update-59(Lets Play)

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Unke baithney k baad ab meri baari thi..

Nicki-By the way AP listen..

Main unke saamne jaake khadda hogaya...

Main-Ji mam..

Nicki-woh actually the doubt you were asking about...

Main-yeah baad mein karlenge no problem let's enjoy the match for now...

Nicki-OK ok cool sit naa..

Nicki mam ne mujhe apne side mein baithney ko kahaa...

Main-no i am good mam aaplog comfortably baitho...

Nicki-Arrey 4 seater hai we good baitho sab baitho aise khadey hoke kaise dekhoge baitho baitho.. Ek or aajao yahaan...

Lekin sabki gand fattey madam k pass baithney se toh Ravi he bacha jo samjh chuka tha as hum school mein ye sab kartey they woh bc hanse jaaraha tha andar he andar...

Main Nicki mam k bagal mein baitha...

Nicki-OK Ravi tum aajao...

Ravi aake mere side mein baith gaya...

Rows k bichmein kaafi space tha toh piche waalon ko jyaada kuch sunane waala nahi tha ab...

Nicki-Hansna bandh kar be Bhaanda fodega kya...

Ravi-Sorry mam.. That was so cool... I am dying lol...

Nicki-Shut up..

Riti-you guys are so bad... Aise koi karta hai...

NICKI-SHUT Up... This is called smartness.. Tu tips maangrahi thi naa merese toh listen first pehle apne perks kaa use karna seekho.. Note it down..

Riti-If you say so...

Main - Kya situation haibe...

Ravi-99% chance humlog group stage par he bahaar hojaaenge....

Nicki-what the fuck... Are you fucking kidding me...

Riti-Eeewww di language students k saamne...

Nicki-oh my god i am tired of explaining it to you kaan khol k sunn dhyaan se you know tere doubts clear kar deti hun main you see these two here Ravi AP and other one over there Sam they are like family to us.. Deepu ko toh tu jaanti he hai..

Riti-offcourse jaanti hun..

Nicki-so uski wajah se main and AP almost 13 years pehle Mille they uske baad Sam or Ravi se mulaakat hui and from that point they are with me in every situation whether be it good or bad... You know how much deva bhai helped me bahot jyaada..... And main or ye 3 are like best buddies forever... Class mein they are just my students but bahaar they are like...

Main-hold a second don't call me your brother...

Nicki-they are like family to me i love them and they love me equally you know in past 13 years humlog ek sath bahot saari situations se gujarr chukein hain together so isliye main Inke saamne kuch bhi bol shakti hun kuch bhi kar shakti hun even Inko maar bhi shakti hun jinko hath lagaane se sab darrtey... Because they trust me and I trust them more then myself... You know AP or Maine Toh 6 din takk ek room bhi share Kiya tha hotel mein...

Main-oh my god that was a fucked up situation.. Mumbai mein right...

Nicki-Right Mumbai mein Deva bhaiya or Deepu k sath ek marriage mein gaye they humlog...

Main-yep sam and Ravi ko ek room Milla tha and hum do ko ek.. That was too much fun...

Nicki-it was.. So basically Riti they are like family to us and trust me you can trust them more then anything more then even me isko dekh rahi hai kabhi bhi kahin bhi problem mein ho toh call him he will get you out like a family member... They are the best persons I have ever seen in my life... Inse jyaada frank main mumma k sath bhi nahi thi lol... So isliye ye students baad mein Or friends pehlein hain.. That'd why I love them so much..

Ravi-ok mujhe aaplog kaa maalum nahi but that speech made me emotional.. I love you Nicki mam..

Riti-Same here like mujhe maalum tha you guys are close but ye nahi maalum tha itana close so I am really impressed by the way...

Nicki-so ab doobara aisa kuch nahi puchna.. Di aap AP k sath aise kyun behave kartey ho..? Di aap Sam ko punishment kyun nahi deti... Di aap ravi k sath itana frankly kyun baat karti ho.. Etcetera etcetera... Ok...

Riti-I got this...

Nicki-And also they are like a family to me that means...

Ispar Riti mam ne unki baat bichmein he Kaat di.. .

Riti - that means they are like family to me too...

Nicki-exactly so kuch hojaae toh call him iski harr jagah chalti hai...

Main-hell yeah.. So kya main flirt kar shakta hun inke sath...

Nicki-No not at all...

Riti-Never...

Main-Joking..

Nicki-khussar fussar bandh karo ab piche waale awkwardly ghurr rahe unhe samjh naa aaraha kuch..

Main - LOL...

Dhoop jyaada thi toh 5 minute kaa break hua or Sam Abhi rohit or baaki players dugout ki taraf aae dono teams kaa agal bagal he hai dugout so sab wahin baith gaye Paani waani glucose wagairaah peeya...

Rohit-Morning Nicki man Morning Ritika man..

Nicki-Morning morning Captain Sir Oh sorry Ex captain...

Rohit-Lol...

Nicki-By the way kya lagta hai..?

Rohit-Humlog group stage mein he bahaar hojaaenge most probably...

Nicki-what seriously...?

Sam-Sadly yess...

Nicki-Oh God..

Lucky-because mere alaawa koi practice par bhi nahi aaya inlog ne pichle 2 months se cricket dekha bhi nahi tha or kya bakwas performance hain sabki even meri bhi itani theek nahi hain you know JN college waale daily 2 hours practice kartey hain and unhi se humaara 36 kaa aankadda hai... Bahot buri tarah haarenge humlog...

Riti-OK thats bad...

Ravi-Yep see you next time Trophy...

Nicki-You all listen tumhe pata haina principal sir cricket k kitane badey fan hain woh harr match dekhenge tumhaara or Agar tum Keh rahe ho waisa performance raha tumhaara toh woh bahot naaraj honge and according to me woh uske baad college se cricket he nikaal denge...

Ye sun sab students par bijli si girri...

Lucky - What..?

Rohit-Holy Mother...

Ravi-seriously...

Mouni-Yes I am sure woh yahi karenge belive me..

Abhi - matlab no cricket at all.. Ye toh bahot bakwas hai..

Rohit-bina cricket marrjaaenge yaar...

Nicki--At this point you guys need a game changer and in this ground I can see only one game changer around here... And you guys know kon hai woh.

Lucky-AP you should play.. Dekh I know hum dono are like opposite to each other and we have our issues but still yahaan humsab ek he jagah fanse hain so tujhe khelna he hoga...

Main-bhai I am happy to play mujhe koi problem nahi hai but you saw my form Abe bahot kharaab hai befaltu team mein ek bandey ki jagah khaaunga..

Rohit-oh come-on yaar try toh kar...

Lucky-Haan perform kar paaya toh fir hum jeet jaayenge warna haar toh rahe he hain... Or dusri teams mein bhi maximum wahi school waale bandey hain jinko school tournaments mein kabse haraata aaya hai tu you got this play naa yaar...

Ashish-aisa kya kar raha haibe..

Nicki-ye khelega don't worry...

Main-Sachmein..?

Ravi-Yep don't worry guys he is going to play...

Nicki-Ab khuss...

Sab-hell yeah.....

OK ab ye lage lawde beta AP itani beijjati hogi ki gand fatt jaaegi... Bhenchod.. But fir bhi I am Mr.

CRICKET the point here is agar main nahi chala toh beijjati lekin agar chal gaya toh saamne waalon ki gand faad dunga...

Continued...

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